Benk:"How do you know if you are a pirate?"

I do not know Benk, how does one know if they are a pirate?

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Q: What gets wetter as it dries?

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(Hey I found some private correspondance!)

Dear Fractelle,

I'm writing this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you forever. I've been a good man to you for seven years, and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today, and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had a new haircut and had cooked your favorite meal and then you sat posting messages on OLO all evening. You’re cheating on me, or you don't love me anymore; whatever the case, I'm gone.

Your Ex-Husband

P.S. Your sister and I are moving away to WA together.

Dear Ex-Husband,

It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good man is a far cry from what you've been. I did notice when you got a hair cut last week but my mother raised me not to say anything if you can't say anything nice and it was my sisters favourite meal you cooked. After all of this and with advice from OLO users I decided I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But when I got home you were gone. But have a nice life anyway.

Fractelle

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister was born my brother.

Ahhh, some wonderful jokes ladies, congratulations!

Keep em coming, its a shame that not more OLO posters had jokes
to contribute.

With your kind of sense of humour, you will always be popular
with the fellas.

What is the difference between outlaws & inlaws? Outlaws are wanted.
Why do elephants wear ripple sole shoes? To give the ants a 50/50 chance.
Man who lay undercar with tool in hand, not necessary mechanic
Man who fill tart with cream, not necessary baker
Man who has hand in pocket, not necessary counting money
Woman who stand near cliff in raw, sure to get knocked off
Woman who fly upside down in plane, sure to have big crack up
and woman who lay on inner spring in spring, sure to have offspring next spring
Thanks All have a great life from Dave

One Sick one:- Dad in bed with daughter says daughter your better than mum and daughter replies yeah her brother told her.
Good night All from Dave.

Son: "Daddy, I have to write a special report for school, but I don't know what Politics is."

Father: "Well, let's take our home as an example. I am the bread-winner, so let's call me Capitalism. Your Mum is the administrator of money, so we'll call her Government. We take care of your need, so let's call you The People. We'll call the maid the Working Class and your brother we can call The Future. Do you understand son?"
Son: "I'm not really sure, Dad. I'll have to think about it."

That night awakened by his brother's crying, the boy went to see what was wrong. Discovering that the baby had seriously soiled his nappy, the boy went to his parents' room and found his mother sound asleep. He went to the maid's room, where, peeking through the keyhole, he saw his father in bed with the maid. The boy's knocking went totally unheeded by his father and the maid, so the boy returned to his room and went back to sleep.

The next morning he reported to his father.

Son: "Dad, now I think I understand what Politics is."

Father: "Good son! Can you explain it to me in your own words?"

Son: "Well Dad, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, Government is sound asleep, the People are being completely ignored and the Future is full of Crap."

Piper

Q; How do you know if you are a pirate?

A; You just aaahhhhrrr me hearty.

Q; What gets wetter as it dries?

A; A towel.