Dear Yabby,

Pappa don't preach!

I can only hope that you're wrong
about the social conditioning not
going to work.

I can only hope that this latest
NRL incident will act as a stern
warning as I said earlier, to both
the players and young women to
re-think their behaviour.

Yabster, I know you mean well -
but we're going to have to agree
to disagree on this.

You see things one way - I see
things differently. I would never
have described myself as being "straight-laced,"
but perhaps in this matter that's not such a
bad thing, is it?

*I would never
have described myself as being "straight-laced,"
but perhaps in this matter that's not such a
bad thing, is it?*

Foxy, one thing I try not to do is to put a judgemental
value on other peoples sexual habits. It is their
concern, not my concern, what happens between their
sheets. I can think of far worse things in life then
sexual habits.

So I simply live by my personal ethics and morals,
for my own good reasons, but that is just me. For
instance, despite my many err experiences, I never
actually lied to get into anyone's knickers. I am
actually proud of that, but many would call it silly,
for deception is the oldest trick in the book in the
everlasting game of boys trying to get into girls pants,
whichever way they can. Anything goes out there. Its
part of nature taking its course.

So even if you were knocking off the pool boy once a week,
that would be your business, not my business.

IMHO the NRL clubs will have to been seen to be pulling their
heads in, for when sponsors like Westfield and others
close off the money tap, they are in deep crap.

Meantime the players and their girly fans will simply move
the whole thing to something like Facebook and meet in a less
formal manner then before. Young people don't take well to
being told what to do and defying authority is a thrill in
itself at that age. So don't kid yourself that there will
be less wild sex parties.

I am wondering why anyone, including me would respond to Ginx, a rudeness, willingness to insult and miss use names is always there.
Over night we hear ,just maybe who told Fox news, sorry ABC, its hard to find a difference.
A team mate, a Christian has been quoted ,not as the sorce but read between the lines.
Why did he wait this long?
Yes yabby has it about right, sex has its way many different tastes but I still see some do not want to think this girls form, her history of sex out.
And her workmates reports , see we all know some one like that, we may not know they are like that but they are not rare.

The whole thing separating opinions seems to swing on the word "consent".
IMHO, not screaming and fighting DOES NOT constitute consent, it is far too easy to say that. As she described it, it just happened, they just kept arriving, and joining in, she was trapped and in shock. I'm sure if a female relative or friend came to you and told you that it had happened to her, you just might feel a little differently! THINK ABOUT THAT!
As for the "men" involved, OF COURSE they're going to say she wanted it, it's classic rapist-speak, but you'll notice they're all so confident of that that they hide, true Heroes all!
I give NO credence to that work-mate's claims of bragging, it never came up until the media got into the act and started waving wads of cash around for related stories. Dubious, at best, and disgusting no matter what.
No matter what you think, the facts remain, it happened, she DID go to the police, and was simply ignored on the grounds that the offenders claimed she was "up for it", a disgraceful outcome at best, and a corruption of the legal system no matter which way you look at it.
Do we now accept that if a group of men rape a woman then claim she wanted it, then it's OK? After all, there's more of them, so it must be true? That's the precedent here!
She deserved a fair hearing and investigation at least, not to be abused as she has been here!

Maximillion:"offenders claimed she was "up for it""

And so did the rest of the 80 people that the NZ Police interviewed. Were all 80 of them lying? She may not have expected what she got, but the old principle of "caveat emptor" has to have some application, surely?

The fact that it was distasteful to you or me doesn't make it "wrong", or the people involved "offenders". As Belly keeps pointing out, they're just people. I'm sure there are many, many more incidents that go unreported because everyone enjoys themselves. If footballers were really such ravenous sex fiends, little better than rapists, do you not think that there may develop a shortage of women willing to be psrt of their "depraved" games? There aeems to be little trouble spreading all sorts of other good information via "girl talk". The girls still like to hang out with the boys, so something's not adding up...

People are prone to doing risky things, often much, much more risky than "pulling a train". People die doing some of them and yet we don't have hordes of people clamouring to ban mountain-climbing, or skydiving, or driving a car. The plain simple difference here is that there is an opportunity for some to jump on the bamdwagon in search of further increasing their own power.

If the most macho of men can be brought to heel, it's a clear sign that victory has been achieved for the career feminists: "Now stop being naughty, you boys." At which point Dad pipes up, saying "Listen to your mother".

The real irony is that the women's-libbing, bra-burning, affirmative-actioning, sexually-revolting 70's feminists have given rise to the New Wowsers of the 00's.

At times, the debate is polarised between two camps: those who think she asked for it and that's the end of the matter and those who think she was exploited. It could easily be that many of the views in the media have an element of truth in them.

OK, the girl is young and exuberant and naively thinks that she needs to get the affections of a high-profile league player. If she turned out becoming that player's wife, would anyone complain? No. That's probably the prize at the end of the rainbow she was looking for. However, she got more than she bargained for when the others came into the room – metaphorically, it's not the dog that's the problem, it's the flea on the back of the dog.

She bragged about her experiences to her friends over the next few days possibly trying to salvage something positive. When it became obvious that no one cared, she felt used and abused. The more she thought about it, the worse she felt until the pressure got so great that she had to speak out about it to relieve the pressure.

What has come out of this? She made a mistake and paid a high personal price and she reciprocally outed the bad ARL culture. That doesn't mean that because she asked for it originally, she wasn't abused and the bad culture doesn't exist. In fact, the clear-eyed will see that the episode just confirms it