I just thought of something reading what Suze said about humor… it should have been in my vows and not the serious vows we were blindsided with.

My hubby is the toughest audience ever, I have to really work hard at making him laugh, and it has to be a most excellent jibe, joke, pun… even some purely physical moments of comedy.

Don’t get me wrong, we are grownups and we have big serious conversations about everything and especially all the kids that come and go where some situations just demand we be very sad for awhile or even angry about things that occur out of our control, however he is a more serious and thoughtful person by nature than me.

I smile seeing him smile, adore a grin, take pleasure in a chuckle and consider him actually laughing out loud the best noise on the planet.

Foxy, just go buy a new one, just go do it because you want it and it would make you happy. Fractelle is right, youtube is great. Plus you come up with the best stuff that you’ve gone and found on the internet to further most discussions so we need you in tip top technological form.

Dave, you funny guy. I read that book years ago then read one called “Why men don’t listen and women can’t read maps” which was really good. Last few years has been all child care books and the authors change their mind and retract stuff every few years.

Dear Antonios,

Thank You so much for your kind offer - but
I think I'll take Piper's advice and go and
buy a new computer. I really appreciate your
offer though - you sweet, gentle, man.

Dear Piper,

Yes - I'm going to do it! (Buy a new computer).
And Thanks again for all your compliments -
(You're giving me a swell head). But you're
right - I need to be more 'technologically
advanced.' Just waiting for stuff on the web -
takes ages - it's like watching grass grow.

But, back to the topic...

You asked in your opening post - whether
the vows still applied if the person you married
changed due to dementia, alzheimers, et cetera?
Of course they do - ('for better or
worse').

I've got my own mum as one example in answer
to that question. My father died of a massive
coronary years ago and mum remarried. My step-father
suffered a massive stroke - and was paralysed down
his right side and lost the power of speech. He
continues to have mild seizures. He's now in a
nursing home. Mum visits him every day, sometimes
every second day -
bringing him all sorts of food and fruiit et cetera,
as well as reading material - and whatever else she
feels he needs. She re-shaves him, re-makes his bed,
fusses over him, takes him for walks (in his wheel-chair),
and so on. She spends about four to five hours with him.
She goes in the afternoon.
She no longer drives due to her own dementia and
failing eyesight -
she catches a taxi. My husband drives her when we can
- (and we visit my step-father regularly). He knows he's loved -
and that mum and the family will always be there for him.

G'Day All,
This is one that I read on Spleen Vent,
Men have better friends than women.
A wife goes out at night & doesn;t get home until the next day, so the husband rings her 10 best friends to see where the wife was but none of her friends had seen her.
Subsequently the husband goes out & doesn't get home until the next day, so the wife rings his 10 best friends to see where he was & each of the 10 said he was with them.
Thanks from Dave.

Hey Foxy, good on you – I swear having a new computer would thrill me more than a new pair of shoes. I keep them all tidy and everything in appropriate files – inbox all sorted each day into appropriate folders then I kind of start sliding until everything is an abominable mess and I can’t find a thing. Something I would never tolerate in my home so no idea why I’m so computer sloppy.

You’re mum is amazing, I dread something like that happening. I know I will do it since I would not consider any other option but I wonder what happens when everything is totally one sided like that. Do spirits stay up, does one become resentful or tired?

I don’t have a good understanding of dementia, do they also forget stuff? See if one of the couple forgot who the other one was isn’t it the marriage vows null and void?

That’s what Houel made me think of – I think I always thought “better or for worse” was more about external things around a couple. And when does “worse” become intolerable?

What was that comedy movie where the young chick woke up each day remembering nothing and some guy fell in love with her and had to remind her each morning who he was etc? Good movie but the emotional stamina would freak me out. I’d be mean enough to give them the odd alternative reality just for fun too.

Dave that joke would go down a treat over in Belly’s new thread about faking it. Funny and true.

Foxy: “Dear Piper,
Yes - I'm going to do it! (Buy a new computer).
And Thanks again for all your compliments -
(You're giving me a swell head). But you're
right - I need to be more 'technologically
advanced.' Just waiting for stuff on the web -
takes ages - it's like watching grass grow.”

Get one of those fancy LCD monitors that will let you see more than 50 characters per line and don’t forget to upgrade from the dial-up service too – we’re all using a thing called broadband these days Foxy ;-)

Piper: “What was that comedy movie where the young chick woke up each day remembering nothing and some guy fell in love with her and had to remind her each morning who he was etc?”

50 First Dates. That’s what the movie was called Piper. See, you’re losing your memory already and your computer is in a mess and can’t find anything when you want it. What if you went gaga first and your hubby was wrestling with the meaning of the vows you both took way back then when you both agreed to “Till death do us part”. You can’t just take that back and pretend it didn’t happen (were you faking it?).

Why don’t you have a talk to hubby – I bet he took those vows more seriously than you.

Seeker:”Why don’t you have a talk to hubby – I bet he took those vows more seriously than you.”

Can’t [sniff] he’s out of town [sniff…]. That thing that flies people in the sky… well it better not crash and leave him paralyzed from the waist down or I’m outta here. That better or worse can only be interpreted by the individual saying it I’m starting to believe but to be fair a couple should get to write the small print together.

Tell ya something about my hubby – don’t tell anyone though. He was in an accident in his twenties (bent a car roll cage bar with a Liverpool kiss) and has short and long term dodgy memory, sense of smell is a bit wonky too, I swear he is going to forget he even has a home one day. I could probably put money on him not remembering any of the vows.

Weird that he is some IT God in the workplace but can’t remember to get the milk on the way home on account of his hideous car crash aye.

My ex was my witness at the wedding (see that memory just came flooding back) and there was the “richer or poorer” vow in there because my ex made a definite loud “pfft” noise when the minister looking dude said the word “poorer”. These guys that pay Child Support - nothing is sacred.

Cheers for the name of the movie Seeker, I do remember laughing lots.