Foxy lovely post but I do disagree with one point "both are equally likely to kill each other.". What I've read on the topic shows that there is a serious gender difference at the extreme end of the scale, women suffer more serious injury and are killed more often by a partner or former partner than men.

I think that there are a bunch of reasons for that, some men are strong and absolute bastards. For others it's a consequence of greater strength and an out of control situation, it's a lack of access to or knowledge of support services, it's maternal bias in the old family law system creating a loss of access to kids combined with crippling property settlements and CSA payments leading to despair. There will be other reasons less obvious.

R0bert

cont'd...

We all make mistakes in life - and the choice
of a partner can often be a 'biggie.'
To 'Stand by Your Man,' (or woman - as the case
may be) is not always possible -
especially if you're being abused.

"Melinda was mine,
till the time
That I found her
Holding Jim
Loving him.

Then Sue came along
Loved me strong
That's what I thought
Me and Sue
But that died too.

Don't know that I will
But until I can find me
A girl who'll stay
And won't play games behind me,
I'll be what I am
A solitary man
Solitary man..."
--- Neil Diamond.

Dear Robert,

Thank You for your kind words.

The reason I wrote that "they're equally likely
to kill each other" was that although women are
rarely a match with men in a fistfight, they're
more likely to use lethal weapons (notably
kitchen knives).

All rather sad really - when research of the
past two decades has revealed an astonishing
amount of family violence - between spouses,
between parents and offspring, and among the
offspring themselves.

Is the violation between pairs part of our ID as humans or part of our culture and civilization?
Is it any glue that keeps pairs together for long time without any kind of abuses? What is love? What is respect? what is the role of the sex? What other kind of glues can keep the pairs together?
How can we improve all the factors wich play a positive role keeping the pair closer without abuses and violations?

What breaks the relations between pairs, physical abuser always is the strongest one the man!
What is the relation between family problems, divorse, (the worst stage of pair's relations) and their financial problems?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse and unemployment?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse and low income?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse and unskilled persons?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse between people of diferent religious, cultures or national background?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse with low income men and high income women?
What is the relation between family problems, divorse with high educated women and low educated men? etc.
I am sure if we study some basic parametres we will find
1. most family problems caused of cause economic problems.
2. Many because men can not accept that their woman can have higher status,( professional, education, economic etc) from them as in our society men "should" have higher status!
3. Different cultures, interests, hobies, etc.
Antonios Symeonakis
Adelaide

Antonios "physical abuser always is the strongest one the man"

That's simply not true. If one party is unwilling or otherwise constrained from returning in kind then strength has little to do with it. One person may be gentler, have different values, more self control or perhaps just less coordinated, to always lay the blame at the feet of the stronger is a great injustice to many.

If I was to point out that women tend to have better language (and perhaps emotional) skills than men so therfore all vebal abuse/emotional was committed by women I'm guessing that you would see the problem, why does physical strength get treated so differently.

R0bert

R0bert
I wrote ONLY for physical abuser Physical abuse is the use of physical force against someone in a way that injures or endangers that person. all the other kind of abuses is an other story.
According to International Amnesty USA
One out of every three women worldwide will be physically or sexually abused during her lifetime with rates reaching 70 percent in some countries.
http://www.amnestyusa.org/violence-against-women/international-violence-against-women-act/i-vawa-background-and-resources/page.do?id=1051154

The United Nations defines violence against women as any act of gender-based violence that results in, or is likely to result in, physical, sexual or mental harm or suffering to women, including threats of such acts, coercion or arbitrary deprivation of liberty, whether occurring in public or in private life.
http://forum.onlineopinion.com.au/thread.asp?discussion=2998&page=4

Declaration on the Elimination of Violence against Women
General Assembly resolution 48/104 of 20 December 1993
http://www.unhchr.ch/huridocda/huridoca.nsf/(Symbol)/A.RES.48.104.En

Domestic Violence and Abuse
Warning Signs and Symptoms of Abusive Relationships
Violent Behavior is an Abuser's Choice
THIS WEBPAGE IS VERY GOOD, READ IT!
http://helpguide.org/mental/domestic_violence_abuse_types_signs_causes_effects.htm

Domestic Violence Dynamics
Common Psychological Traits Often Exhibited by Domestic Abusers
The Driving Psychological Forces of Domestic Abuse
http://abuse.suite101.com/article.cfm/domesic_violence_dynamics

Abuse is not an accident. It does not happen because someone was stressed-out, drinking, or using drugs. Abuse is an intentional act that one person uses in a relationship to control the other. Abusers have learned to abuse so that they can get what they want. The abuse may be physical, sexual, emotional, and psychological.
http://www.domesticviolence.org/who-are-the-abusers/

official rates of nonlethal, intimate violence are highest among women aged sixteen to twenty-four, women in households in the lowest income categories, and women residing in urban areas (Greenfeld). Couples who cohabitate experience more violence than those who are married
http://law.jrank.org/pages/1001/Domestic-Violence-Who-are-abusers-Who-are-victims.html

Antonios Symeonakis
Adelaide