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The Forum > Article Comments > Angry, frustrated and powerless > Comments

Angry, frustrated and powerless : Comments

By Nina Funnell, published 9/12/2008

Vicarious trauma: the trauma incited by an assault is rarely confined to the victim alone.

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Antiseptic: "Don't get me wrong, I'm sure the NSW RCC does great work in its way, but it's still exclusivist and exclusionary on purely gender grounds and it still demonises men to achieve its ideological ends."

Can you give an example of what you mean?

Especially, can you point out how the site "demonises men" ?

If the vast majority of perpetrators of rape are men, then it can't be helped if you experience that statement as being demonized. Is that what is happening for you ?

Phanto: "One thing antiseptic is doing to fix the problem is to enter into the debate and present his opinions in a calm, rational and respectful way..."

Antiseptic's strategy to 'help' men is to stamp out any help available to women. One of the many things that he doesn't seem to understand is that stopping services to female victims also reduces services to male victims. He is clearly much less concerned with the plight of any victim of any sex than he is with maintaining male entitlement to resort to physical means, if necessary, to enforce their will on others.

He does them all a great disservice and sadly can't even see it.

Also, it's known that peer approval/disapproval of violence towards others is crucial in either stopping it or encouraging it to continue. People who really want to stop (any) violence could help by disapproving of violence, instead of putting so much effort into minimizing the violence experienced by others.
Posted by Pynchme, Thursday, 1 January 2009 1:46:01 PM
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Pynchme

Thanks for you comment. Really. :-) I'm really sorry to hear what happened to your child. I have no kids so I can only imagine what that must have been like but seeing what my own ordeal did to my parents I can guess that it must have been a really scary experience. Thanks for sharing it here. Unfortunately, others here clearly lack compassion, not to mention empathy. There seems to be a number of border line- if not outright- sociopaths on this site. It's frustrating to bother voicing my experience (plus expertise) when there are so many idiots and I'm unsure whether these people really are as uneducated and callous as they present themselves as, or whether they are just trying to get a rise out of me/ us. Either way, it doesn't bother all that much, as it just lends weight (not to mention material for my new book) on why we need to keep pushing for equal rights now, more than ever :-)

Hope you have a great holiday season with you family- and thanks again for the support :-)

Nina
Posted by ninaf, Thursday, 1 January 2009 4:09:08 PM
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Pynchme:"Antiseptic's strategy to 'help' men is to stamp out any help available to women"

LOL. "help help, I'm being repressed". You and Monty Python: a match made in heaven.

Pynchme:"He is clearly much less concerned with the plight of any victim of any sex than he is with maintaining male entitlement to resort to physical means, if necessary, to enforce their will on others."

Oh, that's a nice one. Do show us all your examples of me using threats or physical force or me trying to "enforce my will" on you or anyone else. On the other hand, I've frequently gone on record here and elsewhere expressing concern for fairness and for the proper treatment of victims of both sexes, as well as children.

Your trouble is that my arguments are correct and they cut straight to the basis of your own sense of entitlement to ride on the "feminist" bandwagon, which is discrimination. If it's not OK to discriminate against women, why is it OK to discriminate against men? Conversely, if it's OK to discriminate against men, why is it not OK to discriminate against women
Posted by Antiseptic, Friday, 2 January 2009 6:27:38 AM
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Phanto – Ya sa “They may well be victims and in a great deal of pain but it has little or nothing to do with someone else’s experience”. Ya shood bewear yar talken abowt sufwas of vic R’US torma.
Mate ya shood sho moor empaffy.

Medi evil signtists sa vic R’US torma isha mutashion off re-petty’ve stain and jury. Dis okurrd inan airwa wen womyn wid fad arsis gots loads of loot fur bean sufwas. Day dinner av to werk den. Anudder way of gedding loot is sticken da hand up de air n kryen grape. Taxpa’a sauced lukr wll cum fludden yur way unda viktum compo skeem witch dun re choir convic shun, juss priddy face.

Ef ya wanna sea uder sufwas of vic R’US torma take Kaptian Kook ad dis Anal Rapport re bellow.

B hine De smilen faeces ya c dare ar sufwas of vic R’US torma. Wylst ya ad it, getta lodda da grrrl inda middle wid da big wyde kut ad der frunt. Is dat Brazzillion me see? Hehehe!

http://www.nswrapecrisis.com.au/Resources/Annual_Report_2007-08.pdf
Posted by Roscop, Friday, 2 January 2009 3:44:35 PM
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Am I correctly reading this annual report? For one million bucks, half the calls are returned within 6 months.

Sounds like they could do with a lot more money (no doubt such shoestring budgets also constrain the number of pixels afforded to those proud displays of victorious trauma Brazilians).
Posted by Seeker, Friday, 2 January 2009 8:19:50 PM
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Hi Usual S: Sorry that it's taken so long to get back to this one.

Re: The Bulldogs. I've included some links below that show a few things:

1. The matter was concluded because of a lack of evidence not because the players were vindicated. Also, there had been a similar accusation about a year before.

2. A sample of "chauvenistic culture".

There is a listing of about 50 news articles in a Wiki page that refers to many incidents where players touched women, indecently exposed themselves to women, punched one or two in the face, urinated on others (one player explained that they have a bit of fun where they target a woman somewhere and urinate on her legs.)
Players also talked about their bonding by sharing a woman for sex.

3. Go through the list and see how many incidents resulted in charges of assault or indecent sexual assault or anything else.

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2004/03/01/1078117371473.html

http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2004/02/28/1077677017509.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Rugby_league_incidents#cite_note-1

http://www.abc.net.au/7.30/content/2004/s1097323.htm

Lastly, the figures I posted were from another State but are consistent with others collected elsewhere around the world.

Of 600 plus reports made to police - fewer than a dozen convictions were made. That's something like 60 reports being made to result in one conviction. Now bear in mind that a proportion of those figures refer to SA of children and of other men. Do you honestly think that they are all lying?

Also, again:

"The Gatehouse Centre child abuse support service at the Royal Children's Hospital had some 150 new referrals about sexual abuse each month of last year, and only 2 per cent resulted in convictions."

http://www.theage.com.au/news/National/The-rape-of-justice/2005/05/21/1116533577568.html

Is it rational to conclude that 148 children per month lie about being sexually abused ?

I think it's more reasonable to conclude that there often just isn't enough evidence to meet legal requirements for a conviction. Understandable really - it's one of those crimes that's so often hard to prove. However, I would say that the system is definitely working in favour of the accused.
Posted by Pynchme, Saturday, 3 January 2009 1:13:06 AM
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