Ammonite,

you're all far too witty for me to join in (anyway I prefer one on one--with the opposite sex, age not necessarily a barrier :-)

Sheesh Houllie, don't take this the wrong way, but you remind me
of the smartest of my three dogs :)

To explain, she's pretty bright, but as life is a breeze for her,
with no real problems, she invents these little games to play,
to deal with boredom. You sound similar.

I guess if you had some real challenges, like running your own
business or something similar, you would not be so bored and
your brains would be channeled into problem solving etc.

My first marriage was all about game playing, great fun for a while,
but in the end it became quite tiresome.

After quite a few relationships with cute bimbos who rush off to
follow their feelings, I started to appreciate women who are
on a similar wavelength, are reliable, easy going and have a sense
of humour. Integrity matters.

I'm always amazed at how many women limit their reading to New Idea and similar. Now that's all very nice, but they just arn't for me.

Game playing, forget it. I prefer women who say what they think and
can actually express it, without flapping their wings or turning it
into a drama

Squeers is right about stereotypes. Generally if we look at women and men as less than indviduals and only in terms of gender, relationships are set up for failure. There is probably some argument for the existence of 'general' differences but character aspects are not gender dependent.

I tend to agree with Yabby (don't faint Yabs) about manipulation and game playing. If my husband and I want something done we might put on a jocular manipulative 'air' as a bit of a joke but it is not the aim, more a way of asking for something to be done. BUT wait...maybe that jocular approach is itself manipulation - by making the request not look like manipulation, or exposing or admitting to the manipulation means denying it is really there...oh the headaches just thinking about it.

As for sex, many people need closeness for sex to occur but some see sex as just sex. That is fine, different stripes and all that. Maybe we all judge each other too harshly one way or the other. I reckon if you are happy in your skin you don't really care about the way other people choose to live.

Too right Yabby, the only games should be fun ones you play together.

I had a lady who could sit beside me, as I slid a car through a gravel corner, in the forest at 90 miles/hour, & calmly read the course notes. She said what she liked most about rallying was that she told me what to do next. She did not like racing, where all she could do was cheer.

After we parted it was some years before I met a lady who could take the wheel of a yacht, surfing down 30Ft seas in a gale,while I went forward to get some sail off the thing, & drive it beautifully. The fact that she is useless driving an iron is of no interest to me at all.

It's over 20 years since we sailed anything, but I still know she's got the right stuff, if ever the chips are down.

I think you lot are blind to the constant manipulation that is part of all everyday conversations. The beauty in life is what's between the lines, in the subtext. Observing people's patterns of behaviour. How are you in tune with your partners if you don't look into what makes them tick? You have to poke and prod people!

I had a friend once who reckoned damaged people were more interesting. I've had some great times with damaged people. My partner isn't damaged though, and I still find her interesting.

I bet you lot love those SOAPs these days where they have to have a narrator to tell you what the themes are. I figure the whole point of the film/TV media is for the audience to interpret not have it spelled out. Then again the acting is atrocious.

I cant handle a woman who wont call me on all the BS I sprout daily. I need someone to bounce stuff off, to challenge, not someone who agrees with everything I do and say. Nobody needs a cheerleader as a partner, I prefer a critic. I've been that way always. I used to reject quite beautiful girls once I knew they were generally interested in astrology. I deplore flakes. And American accents.

'I'm always amazed at how many women limit their reading to New Idea and similar.'

Same here. But then I think there are more guys who don't read at all.

Yabby,

'To explain, she's pretty bright, but as life is a breeze for her,
with no real problems, she invents these little games to play,
to deal with boredom. You sound similar.'

That's quite perceptive in a way, more so relating to my school years. I created elaborate games to torment my teachers. Actually the poor teachers who encouraged me most were the ones who copped it more. It's the ones who were indifferent, who weren't mourning supposed lost potential that I went easier on.

I spent more energy getting out of doing work than it would have taken me to do the work. But I found it more entertaining that way.

hasBeen,

'Too right Yabby, the only games should be fun ones you play together.'

Oh we play them together. I'm not some kind of sociopath here man.