pure-o
why is it so

its not about men
or what men want

there is nothing..'men' want..[genericly speaking]
we are all different*

we arnt your father
we arnt your former 'boy'-friend
and certainly arnt seeking to be your brother

my darling..its not what i want
or what men want

but what our partner needs
the one we become one with

knowing what i want
might not be..what your life partner wants..[or indeed needs]

i just want one who loves me [and me alone]
cares for the world..but dont put the world before loving me
[loves me before going out and loving the world]

one who when with me is fully..'with me'
not thinking about others[other things]

not thinking what if
not thinking what would he think
but here now being as one with me..just content in being here now

one who knows i need them as much as they need me
but isnt needing to change me..re arrange me..or derange me
nor estrange me..from that i need to love or chose to love..or chose to be

its not about men
but about your other half
together being the complete picture

not puting the kids before me
but also not neglecting their needs
[they need their mother..there will be no one who can love you that pure]

as you are
as i am
not as men think it needs it to be

anyhow..its not about me
its about you

if we want the same things
what we want isnt as important as that we found it in each other

ps i note the advets dont yet have the typical meet others [love links] yet..

so lets see how my post changes the adverts
key word is luv ment want it too

but it comes in too many different shapes sizes needs and wants

sex can be important
but closeness lasts longer
and makes the bonds stronger

Yes of course OUG, but that kills all the fun.

This is a topic where it is mandatory to talk in stereotypes and generalisations.

morganzola,

One thing I hope can be avoided is what I call the gender intimacy stalemate I've seen on relationship blogs (I read them to confirm that, yes, the single deserve to be so)

You'll get a whole bunch of women complaining they don't feel like sex unless they are warmed up with foreplay, they get lots of cuddles, and their partner talks to them more and they feel loved blah blah blah. It's always all about them for the singleton 'no good men' crowd.

When I can be bothered, I sometimes explain that a guy's needs are just as important, and ask why they feel that their needs must be met first.

But then the guys say they see sex as necessary for intimacy of that kind. They don't see why they should 'jump through hoops' to get sex, and that if they got more sex they'd feel like being intimate in other areas of the relationship.

When I can be bothered, I sometimes explain that it doesn't really take much to keep a chick happy and that foreplay can be fun.

It boils down to women saying they fake orgasms and men saying they fake cuddles to get sex. Both groups expecting their needs met first before they'll meet a partners needs in a bitter stalemate.

Mostly, I can't be bothered with it, as I think it's far more entertaining to berate the female posters for using sex as a bargaining tool and berate the male posters for being crap in bed.

Just listened to Jane Caro on Lifematters.

She interviewed a woman who'd hate testosterone injections.

Seems this woman became a 'monster' in the sex department and wore her husband out.

So, should we exchange hormones with each other, just to see how the 'other half' get through life?

Or just try to think of 'the other' before/at the same time as ourselves?

Or will putting the lav seat down solve every real and imagined 'problem' women have with men?

And if that worked, should women lift it up for men?

These are serious matters, where is Sells for a pointer on what Jesus did with his lav seat?

Houellie,

If you wrote a book dispensing your singular wisdom - I'd buy it.

As for women preferring to be warmed up - it's a bit like TBC's old Vauxhall - you wouldn't expect it to take you to Paradise if you didn't give it a chance to idle for a while. : )

TBC,

Testosterone is apparently crucial for maintaining libido in both men and women, so it's understandable that too much in a woman would alter her inclinations....did she start leaving the toilet seat up as well?

I remember a work colleague observing that,

"A man it is only truly happy when he knows that all those around him, male and female, think he has the biggest penis."

Plus,

It has been my observation that many males resent not being treated as MEN - especially when they're behaving like spoilt little boys.

I do believe she did Poirot, but didn't quite manage to pee down the outside of the dunny in quite as magnificent a manner as we men can.

She also spoke of a male specialist doctor (was he a 'groinacologist' maybe?)who took female hormones and his behaviour 'turned' too.

When asked by his wife how his day had been he'd burst into tears and spill the beans on how terrible it all was (her words not mine).

Her conclusion, having become aquainted with 'the base male urges', was that try as we might, there is a large degree of brain-gender-wiring that is hard to overcome (if any of us wanted to anyway).