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The Forum > General Discussion > Do as I do!

Do as I do!

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snake raises an interesting point<<..would like to know why there is a far greater incidence of bad behaviour,insolence,loss of respect, anger and violence since..any form of corporal punishment was abolished>>..mate i will give you a clue

when i was a child we had shows like my three sons..[casey jones,texus rangers,..when i had kids we had shows like seseme street[that dude going around doing good deeds etc[from bonanza]..almost an angel..in short we had movies that had good egsamples to copy

now we have simpsons,..that show on sbs,..non stop murder and cop and medical/cooking..biggest loser type shows..[in short the media shows perversion..[its like we all decended into the lower hells..[have you watched the abc kids shows now on even the abc..its a sad reflection on the abc that used to educate us]

in short i blame the media,[in large part..that has this violent programing..and the high flash rate[watcch the zombified kids sitting there getting uploaded with the most vile info..[sit up and watch the real evil revealed midnight to dawn...

kids are blank slates ..we write the programing into them...its as a previous respondant wrote...do as you like...because the tv says do as i [tv]..do,

anyhow its the tv programing...deliberatly done to divide the kids into consumers and sheep...add in the fact mum/dad is working..and teachers are only there to help the class score from falling too low,...no wonder it was said in the end times woe those who are having kids..

its pure hell out there..[and worse for those sitting hypnotoised infront of that big box of light..in the loungeroom/bedroom sending out its dark mess-age to the me..me-sages
Posted by one under god, Thursday, 4 June 2009 2:52:19 PM
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And here in Mikk we see the problem.
Sorry friend, just because your parents went over the top doesn’t mean it’s bad, perhaps you were overly sensitive?
Seriously, you honestly can’t see the difference between a grown person and a growing child? I would call that a perception disability.
All the rest of your post I find to be idealistic, non-rational, PC bulldust, sorry.
Finally, calculated, careful discipline is NOT assault, its education, and protection, and it’s lack is why the young today have so little empathy or self-control
Posted by Maximillion, Thursday, 4 June 2009 2:56:25 PM
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Jewely

My sister and I were never smacked - though we knew when we had crossed a line.

My sister never hits her children (and neither do I), again they know (boy and a girl) when they have gone too far. It is about setting boundaries and sticking by them. Very easy to hit; not so easy to be consistent with the rules you set down, but in the long term worth it, because those children are unlikely to grow up and hit their kids.

I was hit with a wooden ruler at school in front of the entire class when I was about 8 years old - FOR SOMETHING I DID NOT DO. These days, well I am more inclined to question authority than to immediately take orders. Treat me with respect and I am as sweet as a kitten. Treat me badly - well you take your chance.
Posted by Fractelle, Thursday, 4 June 2009 2:58:12 PM
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Jewely: "Kids are actually quite happy and comforted not being in control"

You are talking about controlling when they eat, where they sit, when they sleep and so on. Do disagreement there.

I am talking about being in control of their discipline. Let me put it a different way. When you can predict when something happens, you are in control of it if does happen. Thus the kid can not control the fact that he is not allowed to write on the walls. But he can control whether he gets disciplined because of it.

By way of illustration, lets assume the kid could not rationally control whether he wrote on the walls. He knows it's wrong, yet his rational mind can not prevent him from doing it. Disciplining him when he does write on the walls under those circumstances is totally counter productive. Now you say - well that never happens. Except it does - something very like this occurs when a person has Tourette's Syndrome.

In fact a similar thing happens all the time - not because the kid is behaving irrationally, but because the parent is. For example they are tired, tense and "discipline" the kid unreasonably. From the kids point of view this is no different. They are getting disciplined. They don't like it, but there is no way they can prevent it. In other words, they have been robbed of all control over what happens to them.

I am convinced it is this that is harmful - not whether the discipline is delivered via a smack, or time-out, or no dinner, having the play-station removed or any other action that doesn't cause serious pain, injury or anguish.

Most of us older ones were after all smacked and did suffer corporal punishment at school. Yet we somehow escaped unharmed. At the other end of the spectrum, you hear of kids committing suicide even through their parents didn't lay a hand on them. You don't have to lay a hand on a kid to be a very controlling parent.
Posted by rstuart, Thursday, 4 June 2009 3:30:10 PM
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At last some rational discussion and opinion. I am the first to admit that nothing is totally "black and white" Every child is a different case and circumstances differ. Of course it is also about having educated parents who have not been in a self perpetuating cycle of violence. As has already been mentioned, boundaries should be adhered to and physically chastising a kid should be a last resort. Sometimes this is the only thing they understand. I constantly see parents in supermarkets giving in to their kids, because the kids are bright enough to know their parents will give in if they badger them and frustrate them long enough.

For the first time I find myself actually agreeing with One-under-God. Television is a bad influence. We accept so much violence as normal, but show a naked breast under innocuous circumstances and the TV switchboard lights up in an instant from horrified viewers. We have strange priorities. I dislike advertising so much on TV I go to great lengths to avoid watching it. It is often very dishonest, it prays on emotion, it is noisy and raises everyone's expectations to an unattainable level to make them dissatisfied with their lot. This of course applies to children too and creates enormous influence. You only have to see their table manners and the way they eat to make it all "acceptable" and that's only one very small example.............I digress !
Posted by snake, Thursday, 4 June 2009 4:40:27 PM
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Whooops, that should be "preys" on emotion !
Posted by snake, Thursday, 4 June 2009 5:07:42 PM
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