"The genders on average are different, yet complimentary."

Ah, Yabby, would that this were true: then none of us would have anything to worry about.

Romany,
In regard to someone being "done over".

If someone questions feminism, the normal response from a feminist is to say that the person is a misogynist. If that doesn’t work, then the next step is to say that the person must have had a bad experience with a woman.

Of course the latter doesn’t equate to logical, as so many women will not call themselves feminist (as mentioned by the author). So these women must be misogynist, or they must have had a bad experience with a woman.

I’m just waiting for feminists to call for schools to start celebrating International Men’s Day as well as International Women’s Day.

I shouldn’t have to wait very long for that to happen.

Desipis

Thank you for your correction - I hope I haven’t inadvertenly misled anyone.

What is indisputable is that women are just as competent at running a business as men. I suspect they are also more inventive, entreprenurial. I know of one women who built up a very successful business; she then closed down her shop - thus overheads, and worked from home using an online site - and without losing one customer.

You ask:

"If feminists are seeking equality, should they be pushing to have women to become as career focused as men ...

First of all, please omit the word “feminists” ... the word “women” is much more accurate

I don’t think women can be pushed to become as career focused as men. Women are either career focused, or they are not; or they see multi-choices. Indeed, are all men career focused, or would they prefer to go into other directions.

However, we will stick to “career”: By the time a woman has reached a position where she is likely to meet discrimination, she has already addressed all her issues, which male colleagues now see as barriers to her promotion. She has made her decisions - often much harder than any man would have to make - knows exactly where she wants to go, and is committed to do so. She should not now be subjected to discrimination in either her advancement, nor income.

You continue: “ ... or should they be pushing to have men become more life focused?”

Pursuing a career, being so driven as to lose sight of yourself, I think is soul-destroying for either sex. I have seen men retire who have identified themselves solely by the job/career they have pursued - it is sad to see them now lost, without sense of identity. This should never happen.

cont ...

I just read an abstract co-authored by Scott Coltrane, Uni of California, published on the website on the “Council of Contemporary Families”, which stated:

“American men have doubled the amount of housework they do and may be having better sex because ot it. ... Wives report greater feelings of sexual interest in and affection for husbands who participate in housework (Joshua Coleman).

Also American men spend more time with their children.”

I do not consider “housework” being life focused, nor gender specific ... Sharing it and freeing up time so that couples have more time for each other, their children, and other interests, is certainly life-focused.

When a man identifies himself, soley by his career, he not only loses sense of himself, but also the couple risk losing sight of each other. This is the dominant feature of not being life focused.

The coming challenge, I think, will be to recognise the ability to work smarter, not harder and longer hours. Having worked for seven years in a $ multi-billion industry, I can attest that this was a serious problem. I suspect that this occurs in many places. Currently, big business, the “top end of town”, indeed, other areas traditionally dominated by men, carries a male mystique which is quite unfounded.

Both sexes must retain a sense of their own identity to be able better to maintain relationships, be supportive of each other, and follow personal interests - this means being life-focused. When this occurs, I suggest that the problems of inequality in the workplace will recede; indeed many inequalities between the sexes ... whilst never forgetting "viva la difference".

Vanilla,

at the moment of separation/divorce a woman's standard of living falls. So if unpaid domestic work was actually unpaid, she would not have experienced a fall in her standard of living.

Bronwyn,

Bettina Ardnts book "Taking sides" she wrote that when it comes to house work, it is who sets the standard. I have known house husbands who have said things like they could wipe down the kitchen bench just before she came home and the first thing she will do is wipe down the kitchen bench, another said he would vacuum the floor before she arrived home and the first thing she would do is.

You guessed it vacuum the floor.

I know women who regard the money they earn as their money and the money he earns is still their money.

A while ago there was an exercise in comparative worth, where the cost of doing certain household chores was compared to professional charges. This certainly inflated the cost of house work. Plus there were certain statistical exaggerations as some jobs tended to be grouped together, for example doing the washing, cooking and supervising children.

Now if a bloke lived by himself he might need a housekeeper once a week.

I know of dinks who do employ a housekeeper.

One of the major causes of conflick over what is descibed as 'unpaid housework' is that most women set a higher degree of 'what is clean and or tidy'.

My wife and I recently had a tift and she said that I could'nt even fold cloths. I replied, "yes I can, I just don't fold them as neatly as you do".

So I guess if you girls wish to set the standard that is what we guys consider to be 'above and beyond' well then yes you may well consider yourself as 'unpaid' in doing so.

Let's face it, some women can get out of bed, don a resonable dress, pair of thongs and go down to the shops for some last minue shopping, while, others have to look like an oil painting just incase they are spotted. No offence intended as some guys are the same.

So, in essence if you set the level of the bar then perhaps you should'nt expect your partner to kkep up, in which case, live with it or find another partner.