Whether by chance or by choice there are millions of single parents who are struggling to make it through each day. Not only are they struggling financially, but emotionally too. For many of them, making it through each day without having a nervous breakdown is a miracle.

Single parents frequently get frustrated, lonely, and irritable, often feeling like a zombie going day to day with no life inside. Feeling that life has too many impossible demands as well as a lack of personal fulfillment leaves you burnt out and depressed. There is just too much pressure to do everything and to do it well all by yourself.

Family and friends try to understand but they can't truly know what a single parent goes through. They don’t know what it’s like to have endless nights of crying because there is no money for Christmas or the feeling of failure because they can’t afford to turn the heat up on a cold winter’s night. They don’t understand the humiliation felt when groceries have to come from a food pantry or have to constantly accept being the bad guy because they have to tell their children, "no" when there’s no extra money in the budget for the ice cream truck.

Hi, I'm new to this site so I thought I would introduce myself. I am a single mom of two wonderful sons and have written a book that is about my decision to be a single mom and how I survive it.

I am not an author; I am just a regular mom who often feels very alone and ashamed. I frequently feel like a failure as a parent and a provider. I wondered, "How many other women feel like I do and think that they are alone"?
I wrote my book hoping that by sharing my very personal story, I could help other single parents to feel less alone.

V.Amberlee

BEAUTIFUL TEARS, A SINGLE MOTHER'S STORY
(ISBN #1-4241-5445-6)
http://www.geocities.com/vamberlee3/beautifultears.html

Well come but maybe a first post should not be an ad?
And do not be so sure others do not understand, I see much pain from the fathers side too even attend funerals of those who could not take that pain.
Your struggle is by your own words self imposed and will be a life long one ,the rewards however are worth while.
Good luck.

V.Amberlee, welcome. I do hope you will be joining in discussions on the site and using it to advertise.

I'm one of the sites resident single dads (full time apart from some weekend time).

What were your reasons to decide to go it alone rather than shared care?

I'm fairly passionate about shared care as a default option except where one parent is unwilling to do so (and then they should not be the prime carer) or where there is confirmed abuse or neglect.

R0bert

Don't you hate that. The second part of the first line of my previous post should have read "I do hope you will be joining in discussions on the site and not using it to advertise."

R0bert

Hoped that was what you meant RObert, the debate however can continue.
I am most defiantly not anti female in this debate, some have true reason to not want fathers seeing the kids.
But my generation has always seen the male pay but not see much of his kids.
It is getting better but not yet as balanced as it should be , I grow weary of funerals that prove this.
My insights came a long while before I got involved in others problems I with some family help raised 5 kids not wanted by a family female who insisted on being free to continue to have unwanted kids on her own.
Bottom line children are not ours to own or use in a spite filled war.
We are privileged to be part of their lives and must always try to be a good part of it.

R0bert, a question for you, as I have my opinions but dont really know much about the mechanics. Is there anyway that shared care could work if mother and father had to live in different locations (say in order to make enough money to get by)? I can potentially see a lot of restrictions on options for jobs etc in order to make shared care work. Easy enough if you live in the city perhaps....