Mrs Pierno back again. Well it certainly is lively, isn't it? I was prompted to write when I read what I regarded as a thoughtful, well-written article by Jehane Sharah. I would like her to read what has been written in the last 24 hours. My husband was using prostitutes before he met me; it's just that he didn't tell me. I agree with Yabby - I was a poor judge of character. I agree with Pelican - if he wanted to keep going with the prostitutes, he should not have married someone like me. I found Sancho's remarks pretty startling. Take this Sancho - you know nothing about human sexuality; you are asexist pig; do you come from some backward ethnic village? To all young women: don't put up with sexist pigs like Sancho! Ciao for now.

Runner linked porn and prostitution. I think it is an unfair linkage. One might slake a desire for sexual variety by viewing porn and thus not betray a partner.

I see it as a wrong to betray a partner. I can't see it as wrong to view pornography.

As long as the porn is of adults engaging in consensual activities I don't see anything wrong with producing it or viewing it.

Dear Houellebecq,

I had no idea your attitude towards women is
one of adoration?

Well, that excuses everything.

Go for it.

Staple away to your heart's content.

And, talking about double standards? - why is it
when I made a joke about a specific male who
behaved badly, you came back with a comment
suggesting I advocated violence against all men?
I did no such thing. I was referring only to this
particular man.

But you're right about 'double - standards.'
I came across the following website:

http://www.jou.ufl.edu/sji/1999/opinion_03.htm

Read it. You may actually learn something.

Foxy,

'Staple away to your heart's content.'
Foxy I never condoned stapling, I explicitly queried whether you thought that was a justified response to cheating, since you thought gluing was justified if a man was cheating.

'I was referring only to this
particular man.'
Even if you took me to mean I did condone stapling, I also was referencing only women who cheat.

I'm beginning to wonder about your comprehension skills young Foxy.

I liked your link, it is a great double standard, and one that I have never subscribed to. If I was a young lass, I would be one hell of a slut. I see slut (I prefer slapper myself) as an affectionate term, that brings up memories of all the wonderful uninhibited sex loving women of the world. I fell for my partner because she was a slapper, who loves sex and is great in bed. Much better than a prudish judgemental starfish. Why anyone thinks a slut is a bad thing I'll never know.

BTW: That particular double standard is justified by the cultural expectation that men do the asking and women do the giving for sex. So in such a scenario, a woman only has to say yes to many men, but a guy has to be accepted by many women, hence the cudos.

*I tend to think the 'natural urges of men' approach is just an excuse for bad behaviour.*

You might think that Pelican, but you could be wrong. In fact
Betina Arndt is one of the few women who lately have tried
to understand the male perspective on this, many women can't.

Lets face it, there are plenty of women who say yes, yes, yes,
up until after the wedding, when they change to no, no, no.

Eventually any healthy blooded bloke will get jack of that
and walking out is sometimes not easy, with kids and sometimes
businesses, houses, money etc involved.

So we could make a list of practical solutions, which might
suit some and not others.

Perhaps a little piggy bank next to the bed, so that when
she really can't be bothered and he can't sleep, he could
donate some money towards the fund to buy that dress she
really wants. Better he spends it at home them elsewhere :)

By the way Pelican and off subject on this thread. I checked
the tomatoe paste at Coles today. All Australian, as much
as you want. No Chinese tomatoe paste that I could see.
Perhaps you should switch to an Australian supermarket,
rather then shopping with those Germans.

A couple of points:
A: How exactly are you a "victim"? Did he give you AIDS? Some other STD? Did he give the lady all you're clothes? Money? Hurt I can understand, but "victim"? Hardly.
B: How were you "betrayed"? Did he indulge in an affair? Did he give his love to another? I can't see him renting a source of satisfaction that wasn't being provided at home as a betrayal, it would seem more like he was relieving you of a duty you weren't able fulfill, an act of consideration. Perhaps you should read Bettina Arndt's latest book, you might gain an insight.
It always amazes me the way women scream "victim" every time a bloke does something they don't like, yet WE are supposed to be "understanding", and "accepting" no matter what a woman does!
Definitely a double-standard in operation there, methinks.