O sung Wu the police were never ever called , but to this day and being nearly at the end of my life, the screaming, throwing of cups & sauces, the face hitting, manipulation of the family & friends left its mark on our lives, we were there for her, to the outside world when first met she was the most charming & happy person, to this day if we portray the opposite to those who met her casually, we are not believed, to all those men who have to cope with the mental anguish of a cruel spouse and mother you have my deepest sympathy
I see it daily now among my friends how manipulation by wives is alive and well with their menfolk.

@R0bert, Saturday, 14 June 2014 10:32:53 PM
Agree. Thank you for those interesting observations.

o sung wu,
I reckon that a lot of the angst about DV arises from deliberate misuse (abuse) of the provision, for instance to soften up the 'other' side in child custody cases.

Of course police are not responsible for the unforeseen (we hope it wasn't deliberate) negative consequences of re-jigging of laws by Left 'Progressives'.

ORIGINS OF MAN,
Why would the world go down the tube if equality applied to men too?

Ojnab,
There are many dominating narcissists around, far more than many of us ever imagined. Or is it that in our youth many of us were naive and didn't comprehend what was happening to our school friends at home? In hindsight I am sure there were and are as many female family terrorists/tyrants as there were drunken belligerent men.

Ojnab: I think you anecdotes and observations are at the centre of the problem. When men lash out in violence against women it is rarely the woman they hit that is really the woman they want to hit. Men can be seething with rage inside at the treatment they have endured from their mother over decades. It can take just one word or look from a partner to trigger that rage and an innocent person can quickly become a victim. I have seen men in their seventies who are still controlled and manipulated by their mothers into living their lives solely for the benefit of their mothers. I’ve known only sons who where told from the age of five that their purpose was to ‘look after mummy when she was older’. I knew a man in his late fifties who had a small medical practice and his mother was his receptionist. He also lived alone with her. Almost his whole life had been lived in the presence of this dominating emotional psychopath. He had in all essence been ‘killed’ by his own mother who had crushed the life out of him with her possessiveness and without ever laying a finger on him.

This does not excuse violence nor does it take away the responsibility for taking control of one’s life so that you are not dominated but it does show how hard it can be to break free of all the anger and fear that can be in one person.

What characterises the feminist approach to the problem is a complete lack of human compassion. Any approach that is without compassion will never succeed. There is even very little compassion shown by feminists toward female victims – they become just statistics or fodder for their real agenda which is to hurt men. If we do not feel compassion for all victims and for all those in pain then we are less than human. ... contd.

...To be totally unmoved by the pain that someone must be in which causes them to become violent shows a hardness of heart that will never be convinced by logic or reasoning. Men will never listen to the voices of those who appear so heartless and devoid of understanding about how human nature works and how emotions can dominate and lead to irrational behaviour.

When men are violent towards women it has nothing to do with mysogyny. They do not feel anger or hatred towards all women but generally towards one woman in particular and the nature of violence is that it strikes at random times when the perpetrator is most vulnerable. Women who want to hurt men also have someone in particular in mind perhaps their father, their partner, a teacher or someone else who has done something to cripple their life in a particular way. Violence and aggression is not our natural way – it is the way we choose when the pain becomes too much to bear.

Projecting our problems with one person onto someone else or even on to a whole gender is a cry for help because we do not know how to deal with that pain we carry from past relationships. The focus should be on providing that kind of help for people which will help eliminate further violence. Until we understand and see our own aggression and how much we want to lash out we can never have real compassion for anyone and we just go on looking for someone to blame for our uncontrolled behaviour. Until we examine our own pain we will not see how much we hurt other people not only by violence but also by emotional abuse and other behaviours that can strangle the life out of those around us.

OMG! For years I never believed Freud when he blamed everyone's mental health issues on their mothers.
Now I can believe him....

Suseonline:
Well one of the most common forms of aggression is sarcasm. Why do you feel the need to try and hurt someone just because they have a different opinion from you?