2/3 (continued)
When I was 16, I was sexually assaulted on multiple occasions on a school camp by a fellow male student and not only did the school sweep it under the carpet, but because of what my family put me through, I was too scared to go to the police- I figured, considering what my family were like, I could expect no different from the police.

As often happens with abusive boys, I attracted abusive women as partners, just as abused girls often attract abusive men. My worst relationship was the one where, besides being sucked dry in every possible way, I was serially raped. She didn't need to physically overpower me or use a physical weapon.

When she wanted sex, she'd simply use my child abuse as a psychological weapon, knowing just what to say to hit me with the most damage, and she'd keep up with that and then accusing me of needing to "be a man" or just needing to "get over it" until I capitulated. You'd be amazed at just how effective psychologically incapacitating a rape victim can be, when the rapist knows just how and where to strike.

It took two years from leaving the relationship until I could admit to what it was and I'm still scarred by it to this day. A recent qualitative study (which I should point out is the type of study which the vast majority of those "thousands of studies" you refer to are) into battered men found my experience to be in the majority.

Liz, let me put something out there which feminists like you cannot seem to get into your tunnel-vision-filled minds (caps for emphasis, not screaming):

VALIDATING MY BEING ABUSED DOES NOT INVALIDATE YOUR BEING ABUSED IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM.

None of my hell makes your hell any more or less horrific than mine. None of my hell makes my hell any more or less horrific than your hell. (to be continued)

3/3 (continued)
But you radical feminists don't seem to get that. You're psychotically driven by this vile notion that to be taken seriously and validated, you have to invalidate any male victim out there.

This is the problem with WRD. If it was about solely about male-on-female violence, while still taking the stance of "yes, reciprocal IPV, female-on-female IPV and female-on-male IPV do exist and are serious problems but that does not diminish the severity of the problem of male-on-female IPV in any way shape or form"; I'd not only not have a problem with it, but I'd even actively support it. Heck, if it took that route, not only would it stop obstructing campaigns for other forms of DV, but it would even open up for cooperation and create a united front where nothing was ignored. Furthermore, such an approach would be no less effective with spreading the message that non-reciprocal male-on-female violence (as opposed to reciprocal IPV which while equally wrong, has never been the focus of WRD) is unacceptable for any reason.

So I put it to you, why would WRD taking that route while still having a female-on-male IPV focus, be such a problem to you?

Bowspearer, I don't understand why Liz45 doesn't believe your story. After all the mantra in the DV industry is that you should believe the victim. She is such an expert on domestic violence you'd think she would know that.

Its official:"It is important that you believe what they tell you. They will not exaggerate about the abuse."

http://www.communityservices.qld.gov.au/violenceprevention/aboutdfv/support-victim.html

For your sake Bowspearer I hope the word exaggerate encompasses the word lying.

"For your sake Bowspearer I hope the word exaggerate encompasses the word lying."

Ros, if you're trying to be a troll by acusing me of lying about my abuse, don't bother. I'm used to being acused of making it up by feminists and by traditionalists, and to be honest, after the first attack in a place, the others tend to lose their sting.

I have to say though that I find your post rather ironic. The article was about the evils of gender based approaches, yet this last bit is textbook evidence of what male victims of abuse can typically expect to be on the receiving end of from society. Is it any wonder that the greatest cause of deaths of men in Australia is suicide....

Sorry Bowspearer, I am not a troll. This subject has been dear to my heart for many years but I am not going to go into my own story here.

In my previous post, all I was doing was stating what the official line is on believing someones domestic violence tale.

I am a little puzzled why Qld Dept of Community Services says "They will not exaggerate about the abuse." Therefore if alleged victims will not exaggerate does that mean that they will not lie, hence Liz45 has no choice but to believe your story irrespective of whether it is true or not.

If it is any consolation I am more inclined to believe your story than Liz45's.

Actually, if you had a really good look at the Qld Community Services website you would have seen what a gender based approach to domestic violence is. On the page headed "Get help if you are a person who uses violence and abuse" all the wording appears to be gender neutral until you get to the bottom where it highlights with a colored background:

"Anonymous and confidential advice is available by telephoning Mensline on 1800 600 636 (9am to midnight, seven days a week)."

Not really appropriate for those of the gender of your assailant.

http://www.communityservices.qld.gov.au/violenceprevention/aboutdfv/get-help-if-use-violence.html

@Roscop - " it is any consolation I am more inclined to believe your story than Liz45's." Well of course you are! Fancy that! Why is that do you think? Don't you think it interesting, that the males on here who call me a 'shrill" or whatever, insist that at best, the abuse/violence is 50/50 (regardless of evidence to the contrary)but when I speak of my abuse of at least 3 men they accuse me of being a "professional victim"? Show me where I've condoned violence towards anyone by any person, regardless of sex? If you can't do this, than admit that your assertions are also incorrect!

@bowspear - I do NOT condone violence perpetrated towards anyone. I find it at best interesting, that as I've asserted above, I've received all sorts of insulting comments; questions about the legitimacy of my assertions re sexual and physical violence, but you get oh so hurt if anyone questions your assertions? A bit one sided don't you think?

The facts are, that all around the world, there is one very sound bit of knowledge - that the overwhelming number of violent attacks by intimate partners are perpetrated by MEN against women, and regardless of all the insults and demeaning language, this statistic will not change - it's just that misogynists or men who've experienced some form of perceived or actual injustice in the family law court want to blacken ALL women and their legitimate claims!