Benk, why do you attribute your apparent problem with masculinity to women? You imply that assertive and articulate women like Severin, Pynchme and suzeonline "hate men". There is absolutely no evidence for that view in what they post at OLO - indeed, they have all stated clearly that don't hate men in general.

It's only the unreconstructed knuckledraggers with whom they seem to have problems.

Benk

If my criticism of people like Warwick Marsh means I am a man-hater in your view, then, using your logic, my complete contempt for the likes of Margaret Thatcher or Sarah Palin must mean I am also a woman-hater.

At least I am balanced. What's your excuse?

ROFL.

CJ and Severin

I will attempt to explain my position again. I have no idea why I bother, since niether of you have made no effort to understand previous posts.

Many people here have expressed noble sentiments about wanting to end gender wars and move towards constructive collaboration. I merely pointed out that these platitudes can be difficult to accept while certain people exhibit certain attitudes.

Severin seems to believe that valuing the opinion of any man who expresses a viewpoint other than her own is beneath her. She equates any compromise solution as an attempt to control her. When she attempts to contribute to any debate, she views any rebuttal of her arguments, no matter how detailed, as evidence that people cannot accept a woman having an opinion.

If we are going to talk productively about certain issues without becoming split along gendered lines, then people need to be prepared to understand that different life experiences may produce different attitudes, respond to the substance of other people's arguments and search for compromise solutions.

So, as Severin suggested, some of us do need to listen a little better. If your post contains counter-arguments to comments that other people didn't actually make, then I may well be talking to you.

CJMorgan <"It's only the unreconstructed knuckledraggers with whom they seem to have problems."
Lol CJ! Damn, now I will get in trouble with Benk for laughing again!

Benk, lighten up a little! You always seem to sound so mortally wounded by everything said that you don't agree with.

Try a little humour- I know you can, because you have always struck me as being an ok guy.

Don't stoop to Antiseptic's level for goodness sake, or there will be nothing sacred about your masculinity as well.

<< You always seem to sound so mortally wounded by everything said that you don't agree with. >>

suze is right - benk, you seem like a reasonable kind of guy, albeit with a bit of a chip on your shoulder about women. The women here who seem to offend your sensibilities only do so because they consistently stand up to the "knuckledraggers" of OLO (of whom I don't regard you as one - I don't think they do either).

Lighten up, mate - women are great. Real men love them.

benk
There has been much compromise in the Family Court system of late - shared parenting is one. Yes there is still room for improvement.

However I am reading the same posts as you but have not interpreted any of Suze's, Pynchme or Severin's posts as anti-male.

I sometimes think we read too much into a post defending one particular gender as an attack on the other. Not so. This is too simplistic and I am sure benk that you would agree that the gender wars do more harm than good not only in matters of child custody but in the workforce and the wider community.

This article talks about masculinity but fails to define what it is. There is some implication that masculinity is about "servant leadership" and being the Head of the Household.

Masculinity and indeed femininity may mean different things to different people, but in the modern world I don't think masculinity is about fostering inequitable relationships within the home, work or elsehwere. It is also not about allowing access to children because of some misguided view of the sacred rites of fathers (eg. if he is an abuser).

(Same goes for sacred rites of motherhood/women - if she is an abuser)

We are confusing criminal activity with gender issues, parents rights versus children's rights.

As Suze said you can fight for the rights of women or children without hating men.

Many men, particularly men whose children have been abused by stepfathers or defacto boyfriends are also fighting for safe environments for their children.