Ah Anti- how I've missed these little quarrels of ours.

To begin with, you are quite right I am not a qualified counsellor and as such i have no contact with clients or client records at the NSW RCC.

I was referring to the volunteer work I do as a public speaker at high schools all over Australia where I donate my time to speak to literally thousands of students about violence against women, sexual assault, and the issues around reporting and prosecution.

http://www.steptothefuture.com/forum.php?j=f&fid=124&y=2009&pid=1464&tid=12&sid=147

Although I do not actively counsel or seek to counsel victims, I inevitably end up being approached by victims who wish to disclose their experiences. This has put me in a 'first point of contact' position and I see it to be my responsibility to assist them in finding more appropriately trained people to speak to, as I believe that anyone who has been the victim of a sexual assault or domestic violence is entitled to the best help out there to deal with PTSD and other related outcomes of trauma.

As for you claim about the veracity of my own case, I cannot tell you how deeply insulting it is to hear you asset that I am a liar. However, I would suggest that you do your research before you go defamining me in public. I have no idea why you think there was no evidence as there is huge amount of physical evidence including blood and male DNA that was found both on me and at the crime site. There was also evidence of a struggle, brusing, swelling, bleeding and a stangulation mark around my neck. No doubt you will assert that I may have fabricated this evidence as you seem to belive that rape never occurs. But it's not possible to fabricate male DNA and blood. I suggest in future you do your research before making such hurtful claims.

dane: "You agrument is another example of women not taking responsibility for their actions."

Actually, it was more about the man taking responsibility for his actions. Regardless of what the woman does - flaunts or teases, if he rapes her then he must be held fully accountable for his actions. I know it is tempting to at assign some blame to her. In the man's eyes she did in some sense "ask for it", as she presumably flagrantly advertised her sexuality. However we have already seen one society go down the road of blaming women for the consequences of doing that - the Muslims. They took it to its logical conclusion. Burqa's are definitely not to my taste.

dane: "How could raping a nun possibly inflict the same emotional damage as raping a prostitute?"

You got this wrong on so many levels. Firstly I wasn't talking about a prostitute. There I agree taking another one for free blurs the boundaries. I was taking about a normal woman dressing seductively and attractively, and then perhaps drinking too much and behaving outrageously. Yes, if a man behaves like this he is doing it to get laid, but don't make the mistake of thinking women have the same motives. The woman's primary motivation in doing this is to attract you so she can talk to you, learn more about you - to put it bluntly evaluate you like a forequarter in the butcher shop. If that works out then maybe, just maybe, she might think about progressing further. But she can't do that without getting you to invest time with her in the first place. And she has to do that in competition with her girl friends - who also look pretty good.

To suggest as you do that because a woman dresses provocatively she wants to be raped any more than a nun wants to be raped is absurd. You simply don't understand the game. Take some time out to learn it before you hurt someone.

Nina,

(G'day:))

I really liked your article and I am glad to see someone
addressing an issue which I hadn't taken any time to
ponder, though I'd felt uneasy at news reports about teens being charged with pornography offences. Sheesh even I know people who have sent and received saucy images. I suppose it's against the law but I haven't heard of any adults being charged with anything.

I don't think the teens should be charged with those offences and I'm dimayed that they might be branded sex offenders. If any charge must be laid, perhaps something more appropriate might concern using public utilities to transmit restricted material, or something.

As for public morality decaying; I really don't think texting represents a worse stage than any other time since we all gained internet access; and perhaps even before that. Whether or not youth have sex or not; or share images, or not - will always depend, I think, on the values with which they are raised.

One aspect of any sort of promiscuity that concerns me is that highly sexualized behaviour is often an outcome of sexual abuse; usually in the home. There is plenty of research on that but none that I'm aware of re: sexting.

Anyway, before the internet, people of all ages used to write some pretty hot letters, and exchange polaroids too. The whole process just took longer.

I think compared to the material that people like Larry Flynt bandy about, that sexting, and what it represents culturally, is pretty mild.

Antiseptic,

Dear me. If the alleged problem of allegedly false allegations is of such dimensions that men like yourself are fearful, perhaps you all need to take steps to protect yourselves.

I suggest being much more discerning about choosing sexual liaisons and being very clear about consent.

Btw: The woman concerned in the mobile phone recording denies the interpretation taken by the court. It strikes me as just a little odd that the fellow didn't produce that evidence to the police when he was aware of the accusation.

ninaf:"volunteer work I do as a public speaker"

So you don't "work with sexual assault victims", as you claimed. Padding the resume is such an embarrassing thing when it's discovered, isn't it?

ninaf:"I cannot tell you how deeply insulting it is to hear you asset that I am a liar"

I simply pointed out that the two women I mentioned had had their own claims falsified comprehensively. Still, I think I understand how you feel. It must be a bit like the way I felt when I was falsely accused of being "violent", by a woman who understood the sytem.

Just to clarify for us all, what is the policy of the NSWRCC in regard to verifying allegations? Does it have one, or is it assumed that any woman who rings up is a genuine victim of assault? What about men who ring up?

If it becomes obvious that the claim is bogus, what does the NSWRCC do? What if the claim proceeds and is disproved in Court? Is that caller still recorded as a "Victim" in the stats kept by the Centre?

rstuart:"if he rapes her then he must be held fully accountable for his actions"

What if he is in a similarly impaired condition? Why is she absolved of responsibility in this circumstance while he is not?

pynchme:"The woman concerned in the mobile phone recording denies the interpretation taken by the court"

There was no "interpretation", it was a movie that showed she was "enthusiastically participating". If that's not good enough to disprove her claim, what do you suggest a man might have to do to prove consent? Should I have a consent form ready in my wallet for any prospective sexual partners to sign? How about wiring the house with cameras and sound recording devices so not a second of the transaction is missed and administering a breath test to ensure she's not had anything to drink?

It'd be easier and cheaper and no doubt just as emotionally satisfying to simply hire a hooker

Anti

As said before I do not speak for the NSW RCC. But to answer your question men who contact the centre are treated like all other clients; with dignity and respect. The centre receives plenty of calls from males who have been subject to sexual assault (it is estimated that by the time a boy turns 18, one in seven will have expereinced some form of inapropriate sexual contact). But it's also important to note that many of the calls made to the centre are made by people who are supporting victims who do not know what to do/ say. Many of these calls are made by men such as distressed fathers/ boyrfriends/ husbands/ sons/ brothers etc/.

Like all the clients at the RCC they are given counselling assistance by highly trained professionals.

Also your comments about the legal system and the RCC are confused at best. The aim of the centre is provide counselling support to traumatised individuals. We know that less than 1 per cent of rape cases are successfully prosecuted anyway so with hold a counselling service on the basis that a conviction has not been achieved is ludicrous. We know that only about 15 per cent of cases even get reported to the police and then beyond that very few make it to court as it is very difficult to prove when its one persons word against another. On top of that there is still a lot of prejudice against victims (even if she was raped she must have been asking for it- type logic) so it was of, if not the lowest prosecuted crime in Australia.