Jewely

Girls have been advantaged by changes in assessment. Boys tend to like multiple choice, because we are socialised to have a bit of a gambler's mentality. Girls prefer assessment that involves writing and especially prefer assignments where they can "collaborate" with friends. I have never heard claims about wording, except one article (which I cannot now find) about American SAT tests. Apparently, significantly more males could define annihilate and many more females could define infidelity.

The women in boardrooms has been done to death here and elsewhere.

Liz

I hereby condemn men (and women) who underpay their child support. Happy now?

Dear Lizzy, I have some comments with facts to back them up. Yes I heard your namesake, the Sex Discrimination Commissioner ( a more apt title would be the alternate head of the Office for the Status of Women) on ABC Radio this morning being interviewed by Philip Clark. As you know she trotted out the old 1 in 3 will experience in their lifetime dah dah dah. So both you and she are very fond of citing statistics as if they give a realistic picture as to what happens in relationships. But you should know by now that they don't. The one thing you Lizzies don't talk about is the severity of the violence behind those stats. ranging from a push or a shove in the past 12months (thats what gets picked up in ABS stats) to knifings, shootings etc. On that continuum guess where the bulk of the so called violence...yes that's right...up the minor end...knifings, shootings etc are less than 3%. I put it to you that the type of violence that you say you experienced from you husband ie being concussed, is most uncommon.

I suggest you take time out for some introspection and ask why am I one of the very few women who incurred violence up the severe end of the scale.

Oh and BTW you are excused from responding to my comments on drinking spiking because I new you would have nothing intelligent to say with respect to that issue.

Ros - The Laws in this country re domestic violence involve a variety of acts including, physical, sexual, psychological, financial and social abuse. When you read the explanations, they make sense. Nobody has the right to prevent you from seeing family or friends; or to go out to work or humiliate or harass you. These actions are usually part of the history of the abuse of women. My husband prevented me from buying essentials for myself and my kids, but of course, he needed clothes as he went to work etc. I went out to work when my youngest started school, as I just could not stand the days and days of rows, silences, whacks around the head, driving in a manner that terrified mykids etc. On and on it went, over anything and everything! This is psychological abuse that causes so much stress!

My experience involves a myriad of behaviours now recognised as abuse!Thank goodness, about time I say!He was a thug and a coward!Can't stand the truth either. Lies his head off! Threatened me again 7 yrs ago!

I'm sorry for anyone who experiences violence, regardless of what sex they are or what sort of a relationship they're in.
If you want to disregard the stats, particularly the peculiarities of Australia, then go for it - the reality won't change just because you choose to ignore it - or RObert, or benk or anyone else for that matter. I could forgive him for what he did to me, but not the misery he placed on the raising of his children, our children.
I've gone around in circles. I can't see any point in repeating myself. I know my reality. I know he committed crimes of violence against me for over 20 yrs, and no amount of abuse by anyone will change that. I'm not the little scared woman of those years. I have my life back and have had my reality vindicated. What you or anyone else says does not change that!

benk:"How could you possibly hold it against Jewely that she was a foster carer?"

I don't. I hold it against her that she tried to pretend it was all altruistic when it clearly wasn't. As I've said before, I reckon she was doing valuable work, but it was a job, not some kind of higher calling.

Jewely:"They serious? Any of them? "

All too serious, I'm afraid, The world is being remade in the image of the Fabian Feminists and it'll all end in tears, I'm sorry to say. It's all based on the fact that the 20th century was overflowing with cheap power thanks to fossil fuels, thus freeing women from the need to spend all day doing household chores. That won't last and creating expectations in people that require such intensive subsidisation is not going to assist us to arrive at a soft landing.

Liz45:"I don't agree that just because there's an isolated case of a mother killing her baby or older child, that there's lots of women doing it out there,"

Yes Liz, but you are in complete denial of reality, that's clear. Tell us again what a bastard your husband was, that scab hasn't been picked for minutes now.

Liz45:"Only this morning, the Sex Discrimination Commissioner stated, that 1 in 3 women will suffer abuse IN HER LIFETIME!"

And in the meantime, the real figures show that 805 of all violence in Australia is experienced by males. Broderick is an advocate, not an impartial source. She is similarly quoting advocacy groups, not real research. Never mind, she obviously picked a scab you find especially appealling, eh?

Liz45:"According to govt stats, over 90% of those parents behind in their child support are men"

Actually there's another of those little lies, Lizzy. you're not a very honest person are you? It makes me wonder just how much of the claims of violence you make are based on no more than your own lurid fantasies. I suspect that would be most of them.

Liz

"I'm sorry for anyone who experiences violence, regardless of what sex they are or what sort of a relationship they're in."

That is all that we wanted to hear. Our society needs to move away from this ignorant male villian/female victim false dichotomy and accept that all participants are victims to a degree and worthy of empathy.

Your experience tells us nothing about other people's experience.

In public a male is more likely to be physically attacked by another male, in the domestic sphere physical violence is most likely to be committed by men. Our jails are full of them.

Coincidentally, I cannot help but notice that the majority of posters who attempt to belittle female posters' direct experience of male violence are also male.

Just look through this thread as an example the majority are male and few acknowledge the reality of the female experience. The irony is that these same posters such as Antiseptic, Roscop, Robert etc have more to fear from other MEN than they do women. Guys are more likely to be bashed or bullied by other males. Not denying there are some female bullies out there but not likely to be a physical threat. Nor are women brought up with a sense of entitlement that we men are - women are taught to fear men are taught to be tough. I can go anywhere I like at any time (it may be risky) but my partner has to take care when alone, even in the day and she is not watching out for suspicious looking girls - she is always on the alert for men, usually young men when travelling on public transport or walking down a street - things I don't think much about at all.

I have been posting here, on and off, for many years and I notice a decline in female posters, whether this is through natural attrition, say loss of interest or not enough time, I do know that some strong female voices have gone from these pages, Anansi, Yvonne, Cireena, Celivia, Brownyn, Fractelle to name a few. If I have noticed then I am not the only one. The erudite Pelican and Foxy continue but avoid these threads, sad but understandable.

Men have more to fear from other men than women. It is way past time that we joined with women in outing our violent brothers, else you are just part of the problem. You protest so loudly I suspect the latter.