To Belly.

Only 14 years old? Sad at any age but that is so young. :( May God give her peace after such a horrific death. If this was done to her I hope the perpetrators are caught and put in jail. (Or deported).

To David F.

You do whatever you can to avoid the points I've given you, if that makes this easier for you. As for your criticism of not getting along. That might be a fair point, but in my observations of my attitudes, I would say I get up set when people are rude and disrespectful, or if they are manipulative and deceiving. If they are long conversations I might get tired of my perspectives not being taken into account, especially if I've tried to take theirs into account. But that takes time to lose patience in that way. I can walk away from those conversations and give myself space from those individuals.

As for you, I'd suggest you to not be disrespectful and see if that changes my approach to you. Try not to get so angry when others hold a different view then yours and they don't change it for your sake. If you can avoid being angry yourself, there's a good chance others won't be angry with you (even if your views are different).

Dear NNS,

I don't think you have made any valid points except one. It is good to control anger and not let it master one. It is good to accept whatever external circumstances one encounters and live with it. There are some things we cannot control and other things we can control. If we can tell one from the other and do what we can about the latter we will be better off.

Although I find little in your views to agree with I don't think you are manipulative or deceiving. Perhaps it would be better if I did not have an interchange with you as we have so little common ground. However, If I do respond further to you I will try to do so without anger.

We live in the same world but see it very differently.

David F.

If you can respond without anger or disrespect I would appreaciate it.

Having different views of the world can help broaden our understanding of the world and strengthen our views by challenging them. So we see more of the merit of them through being challenged, or we see the faults in them by being challenged.

It's when it becomes a personal attack that this dynamic is wounded or breaks apart. When I first saw your posts in reply to the topic I started, I thought that this was a civil person willing to discuss their views and others. But after I didn't change my stance, your tone quickly changed to become more aggressive and threw in several forms of a personal attack. I wish I could say that I'm strong enough to turn the other cheek and not reply in the same manner, but that is my struggle. Still working on that.

If this helps or applies to you, here is some advise that has helped me when I was younger. Don't take it as an insult if someone doesn't agree with you. For me that helped me see their perspectives a little clearer and see their merits or faults a little easier. If that would help you, then I recommend it.

Also, just try to be respectful. It's not an attribute earned, it's more often an attribute shared. More often then not people respect those who respect them and disrespect those who disrespect them. In that light to treat others the way you want to be treated puts the first step towards a better relationship, regardless who they are or your different views. Since being treated respectfully is something everyone wants, there's no reason to not give it generousity before it is earned, or shown that they don't deserve it.

Dear NNS,

It is good advice to try to be respectful. However, can one be respectful to the person without being respectful to the person's views? You and I are both human beings and can try to respect one another. I think your religion is horrible. Can I respect you as a person and still think your religion is horrible? Can you accept that?

Yes admit it, my last post was pure emotion, gee I HATE the miss treatment of women and children! not entering in to the men suffer too debate, we know that is true but this is horrific,yes WASPs too do wed children, but this poor kid is a victim of a faith! that makes an art out of harming women and children! goggled the subject and AT LEAST 64 cases are under review! poor fella my country!

Dear Belly,

The legal, marital age in some states of the US is quite low.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_marriage_in_the_United_States

In 19 states there is no minimum age, and children of any age can be legally married.