Hi all. I have a 10yold niece and she has been asking me about sex and how does it feel or how is it done etc...
Her parents are way too busy and I'm her favourite uncle and pretty much I look after her. I'm only 22yold male and I've been through some positives and negatives in my sex life.

She has told me her and a friend have touched each other in a sexual way when they were at a sleepover. What is a good way to talk to her about it? She won't go anywhere else or ask anyone but only me.
She also tells me that she would like to become a model

Hi Kurtis. I guess you're between a rock & a hard place. I would have a talk to her parents & tell them , in confidence, what your niece has requested.

I have found that children go through various stages of inquiry about Sex. I have also found, contrary to the pushed PC belief, that it's not really "Sexual" at an early age.

Inquisitiveness happens around 4 years old with, "I'll show you mine, you show me yours," & that's about it. Maybe a little feeling but it's not really sexual. Around 10 years old they start to ask some serious questions, but more on the nature of things & how & why thing happen. Usually followed by a lot of giggling & embarrassment (still not knowing why they are embarrassed.)

14 to 16. OMG, This can be Hell & it really all depends on how the first two episodes were handled. If there was a lot of yelling screaming at "You dirty little buggars. You'll fry in the Fires of Hell" then you are going to have a lot, LOT's, of problems. If that approach was used then Attitudes & Mental Health problems abound & you caused them.

If you handled the first episode with distraction & the second with frankness & truth the third episode will be a breeze.

I know kids of that age don't like talking to their parents. They are embarrassed & do naturally turn to a trusted relative. It used to be OK 60 years ago but with PCness today you would be accused of being a Pedo. Still, have a talk with the parents about her inquiry.

Kurtis,

That is not your role and it is highly inappropriate. You are out of your depth anyhow.

Some might go further to say you have already abused her trust and the trust the family and society places in you.

No more talks like that. Quietly demonstrate more separateness, which includes not being alone with her, ever.

Go out and get involved in something, anything that can be a passion in life. It will help you meet people your own age.

No drama either, don't go telling or implying to this child minor that you are withdrawing because... That would be emotional blackmail and damned wrong. Just quietly get on with your life. Allow her to develop at her own pace, with her own friends and accessing the freely available sources of information and support that are around her.

You are not doing the child minor any favours at present, far from it, despite your protestations that you are. ATM it is YOU who would seem to be dependent upon her for friendship, emotional exchange and support. That will not be lost on others (say) the parents of her friends or teachers, now or in the future when serious questions may (likely, WILL) be asked.

As for talking about the child minor with her parents, forget that.

Just stop what you are doing today, immediately. Demonstrate distance and independence. Find your own pursuits. That is enough.

OTB: As for talking about the child minor with her parents, forget that.

I don't agree. The parents have the right to know that the child is curious about sex & that she has approached a third person. That person has an obligation to alert the parents, discretely, to the situation with their daughter. It's the parents job to take it from there.

There is no need for panic, this guy has a dilemma & asked for advice. This is a good thing. If more people asked for advice like this the world would be a better place. Having a panic attack is not good advice.

Avoid any comments this bloke sounds like a pedo

I agree ChrisGaff, this thread should not have been allowed.