- Given usual animalistic urge excuse to produce children is neither universal or absolute.
- Figures suggest that the more affluent the citizens of a culture are the lower the birth rates.
- There are countless examples of happy couples that are choosing not to have children.
- that we can't go on breeding ourselves into extinction like the Anasazi, several Mayan city states, the original settlers to Greenland etc.

So why do YOU have or want children eventually (if you do)...really?

Now in my seventies I have never regretted not having kids in spite of being told all my life that I would. I am not anti children although I think it significant that many grandparents now cherish the fact that they can enjoy their offspring without any hassle and responsibility. I have always felt that children give an enormous amount of pleasure and satisfaction, but also an equal amount of worry and strife which hardly cease to exist when they become adults ! I am also a strong believer that there are already too any people on this planet and adoption of unwanted children would be more pragmatic.
From a purely selfish point of view, I would never have been able to experience some of the things I have been able to do over my life and a contented happy person is also important I think.

No matter how I say this I can see that I am going to cop sh/t from the religious, feminists,or even atheists for that matter
But here goes

The instinctive behaviour of man, to search for HIS "immortality" is the progression of his genetic line
That which will live on after he is gone not this everlasting life after death in a spirit world

In primitive times this meant males having as many children as possible to as many "perfect" mates(Females) because of the high mortality rate and short life span of the adult

Then as we progressed to cultivators the more children the better to work the fields and many cultures still practice this hence why male offspring were/are preferred

As we "progessed?" through the ages to the Now, the religious orders governments legal professions etc polluted and defiled that instinct until we have what we have today

"CONFUSION"

And yes with child abuse defined to the extent that it is it makes me wonder is it child abuse itself to bring a child into this Stuffed world?

Thanks
From Dave

I am very pleased to have not had rugrats, although I guess there is still the possibility if I was to meet just the right person and she particularly wanted it.

I compare myself to my brother who has three fantastic kids, of just about the best sort that you could imagine, all now in their teens. I think that if I’d had kids like them, it could all have been pretty good. However, the probability of that would have to have been small.

Even though his kids are great, he hasn’t been short of frustrations relating to them, and has been very tied down in his freedom to travel or indulge in his major interests….not to mention being half-strangled by the cost of raising them.

He’s envious of my freedom. I’m pleased to be able to get out on the weekends and go bush and indulge in my botanical, geological and ornithological passions and to spend a fair portion of each year travelling.

It seems to me that kids can bring enormous joy, but also enormous frustration, worry, stress, etc, when compared to indulging in whatever other pursuit you are interested in. I reckon having kids doesn’t compete very well and certainly doesn’t come out clearly ahead….unless you are the sort of person who doesn’t have much passion for any particular pursuit in life other than raising a family!!

Of course lots of people indulge in their passions AND have kids, apparently successfully. But how successful is it really for many of them? How fully are they into their interests or into raising their kids? How evenly distributed are the parental duties? How often is it a case of one partner being right into their own thing while the other partner effectively raises the sproglets?

Everyone needs a purpose in life and children can organise a person's life. You need to get up in the morning. You need to provide decent meals. You need to provide exercise. You need to be sober most of the time. You have to go to work everyday to feed the little bludgers.

Without children you need another passion in life that gives back to humanity.

So we can choose but simply not having children may lead to a lot of people sleeping in, living in a tent on the beach, having bottle friends instead of human ones and generally dropping out.

Children allow the wage slaves a reason for putting up with the mundane, the ordinary, the daily traffic, the early mornings etc etc. staying in jobs they hate etc etc.

So really only those that have another passion, talent or really good self discipline should not have children.

I fully respect people's decision, chosen or otherwise, not to have children. Each of them does the planet a great service.

Having had two of my own, however, I am eternally thankful for the way in which I changed as a result. I'll never forget the rush of maternalism that swept over me on the birth of my first child. No longer was I the centre of the universe. I had someone who was entirely dependent on me and it changed me permanently and for the better. It had never happened before, but from then on I could be moved to tears when I saw a child being mistreated. My powers of empathy for another's suffering were considerably heightened as a direct result of motherhood.

I've sacrificed a lot for my children, but wouldn't have it any other way. The joy they've brought to my life far outweighs the lost opportunity to forge a brilliant career. Some of the best years of my life were the ones I devoted solely to their care and nurturing, but it hasn't stopped me from eventually going on to expand my interests in other areas. I mightn't have travelled the world or lived the high life, but my world is rich and enriched always through the lives of my children.

I do however, when I look at the current state of the world, wonder if I'd have children today if I was just making that decision now. Unfortunately, I think the future for today's babies might be a bleak one. I'm certainly not pushing for grandchildren, even though of course I would love them.

I do think the days of large families are well and truly over. All governments should be encouraging family planning and moving towards small families or none at all, and contraception and abortion should be easily accessible to all, especially in third world countries.