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The Forum > Article Comments > The hidden assaults > Comments

The hidden assaults : Comments

By Joanna Bourke, published 10/9/2007

In bedrooms all over the country, women are still subjected to sexual violence from their spouses.

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While I think that this is a poorly argued article that has plenty of shortcomings for our resident misogynists to exploit, its overall thesis - that women are still far too frequently suffering sexual assaults by intimate male acquaintances - is probably quite valid.

I also think that Col Rouge's comparison of sexual violence by men with "verbal assaults" by women indicates an essential misogyny in his view of male-female relationships. Show me anyone who would rather be raped than yelled at.

As for runner's weird comment that "if we evolved from animals their (sic) is no such thing as rape!", I can only conclude that his experience of sex - whether between animals or humans - is very limited indeed. Rape is sex without consent. It happens all the time in the animal kingdom and all too frequently among humans.

While it's quite laughable to read the woefully ignorant runner's assessment of someone else's scientific understanding, it's no surprise that he trots out the old fundy patriarchal admonition "for wives to respect and submit to their husbands".
Posted by CJ Morgan, Monday, 10 September 2007 3:07:05 PM
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Its like some type of automatic programming.

As soon as an accusation is made about the male gender, and someone questions that accusation, then out come the words “patriarchal” and “misogynist”.

This month will probably be rape month with the release of this book. Last month it was men carry out domestic violence. I think the month before that it was that there hasn’t been a female Prime Minister, and the month before that it was that men are denying women their right to have an abortion.

But each time such accusations are questioned, then out comes the “patriarchal” and “misogynist” card.

What do the words “patriarchal” and “misogynist” now mean.

“Patriarchal” and “misogynist” are words used to stop someone from questioning the myriad of accusations made by feminists about the male gender.
Posted by HRS, Monday, 10 September 2007 5:12:55 PM
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I found this article to be both truthful and sad. I am sure that rape happens in marriage extensively, my difficulty is trying to figure out what to do about it.

Perhaps raising boys to be more respectful of women would be a good start. Perhaps women being more understanding that men do not have the same sex drives that women do would also help.

Perhaps the entire idea of romantic marriage needs to be more closely examined, and the idea that sex is not a right indoctrinated into men rather that it is something joyful to be shared.

Unfortunately a lot of men (and probably some women) have heard and laughed at the old jokes: "How do you cure a nymphomaniac? - Marry her", "What food turns a woman off sex? - wedding cake". And the old bean jar principle: that if a couple put a bean in a jar every time they make love during courtship and the first year of marriage, and take one out every time after that the jar will never be empty. Whilst jokes, they are sad jokes for many men.

But men have to realise that women are not just there for sex, if that is all they want women for they would be better off getting themselves neutered.

Women should realise that men, in general, want sex and that their desires are different, so maybe women should not be volunteering for marriage at the rate that they do.

From all the articles and postings on OLO I get the very strong feeling that women get nothing out of marriage except violence and sexual assault.

Well ladies - start raising your girls to avoid marriage completely, to stop thinking of brides as princesses and to start understanding that romance doesn't work, and maybe we would have less marriage and less violence and rape in marriage: The message is that men cannot control themselves - so don't partner with them.
Posted by Hamlet, Monday, 10 September 2007 6:34:09 PM
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It's like some type of automatic programming.

As soon as an article is published at OLO about male violence, then out come the usual misogynist suspects from under their rocks.

Col's comment is misogynist because it callously equates the violence of sexual assault by men with that of verbal abuse by women. As if any person who didn't hate women at some deep level would make such a comparison.

Runner's comment that wives should respect and submit to their husbands is patriarchal because that's exactly what it means.
Posted by CJ Morgan, Monday, 10 September 2007 8:19:01 PM
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I'd like to see the definitions which the claims the article makes are based on.

- Are we talking about violent sexual assault?
- Could they in fact be talking about a wide range of experience from women feeling some pressure witin a monogamous relationship to have intercourse when they don't feel like it through to violent sexual assault?

My suspicion is the latter but I'd be interested to know if anybody has definitive information on the source of the claims.

R0bert
Posted by R0bert, Monday, 10 September 2007 8:59:55 PM
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Runner,
re: Foyle your absurd unscienticic comments..
Aren't you aware of Raymond Dart's "The Predatoty Transition from Ape to Man"? Dart was an Australian born head anatomist at Witwatersrand University, SA, who investigated the Taungs skull in 1924 and many other major fossil finds in the limestone caves of that area. And maybe you are also not aware of the 24 parallel lines of evidence used by Robert Ardrey, in 'African Genesis' and largely derived from Dart's roomful of bones, to prove beyond reasonable doubt that australopithecus africanus went around armed and hunted for a living using using the distal end of the humerous bone of a medium antelope as a club (and the partial jaws and teeth of animals as knives and scrapers). And this was about 50-60 thousand human generations ago. Both Dart and Ardrey were convinced that africanus committed murder so I wouldn't argue that africanus wasn't capable of rape. As an ancient science graduate I don't make statements unless I am aware of significant evidence in support. Our capacity for violence and our capacity for amity come from our evolutionary heredity not from some supposed original sin or from religion, respectively.
Posted by Foyle, Monday, 10 September 2007 9:53:28 PM
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