I think Nick Gruen's balance was about right; he must be the archetypical "on the one hand this, on the other hand that" economist. And my memory from a long-ago dinner is that he's a vegetarian.

I must confess that my wife carries more of the load than me, besides having provided great support through my several years of serious illness. But we get along, that's the main thing.

In my defence, when I changed schools at age 12 I sought to do the domestic science rather than woodwork class, but was prevented by gender bias. Perhaps my wife is bearing the long term costs of that sexist decision ...

Household labour is really all about how we negotiate the terms of the relationship we have with our partners.
I do the cooking, shopping , and most of the childcare of our infant son and our school age daughter. But my partner does do more cleaning than I do . How ever this works for us and that is the important thing . We have worked out a division of labour by explicitly negotiating who does what and when it gets done .
I will agree with a previous comment that men and women see the importance of cleaning tasks differently . My partner gets very distressed with a level of mess and disorder that I can easily live with and that is the reason that she does more cleaning than I do .

No worries Opinionated2

My partner is a forgiving woman (Thank Christ! For I'd be a dead man by now).

Re "...Aussie". She's kiwi born (and of Scottish blood) so you can realise the vast risk of cultural and linguistic misunderstandings from people of that warrior caste.

Yes, I agree that in most cases women are better workers than men and that they do far more around the house in most relationships.

What's been referred to as the "nappy change" (by others - and it sounds derogatory) undoes the chances of reaching senior positions for many woman from what I've seen. Just being a year out of circulation in a company makes a difference in advancement prospects - and reinforces the misconceptions company management that women are particularly biologically driven.

There are few stats on this nuanced subject and even stats can lie - so we do indeed need to rely on our own experiences.

Regards

Pete

I think the fact that we have enough time to post on OLO shows that our partners are probably taking on most of the work ;)

i am happily married with four children here is a typical hot 40 degrees day i work most afternoons;
6am - baby wakes up i make toast and bottle try to sleep for another hour while baby talks to me - husband sleeps soundly
7am - wake up, shower, dress myself and baby
7.30am - wake remaining children up feed and dress find lost objects - my children are not morning people u could imagine.
8.am - husband gets up and gets himself ready for work while talking to me about his proposed day.
8.30am husband goes to work (airconditioned office) i load & drive kids to school nice hot car, 3 different classes the same time.
9.15am get home clean up from morning make beds care for baby start washing
11.00am baby naps i pay bills make phone calls etc
11.30am wake baby pick up 1 from school come home make lunch get ready for work, baby sitter arrives i go to work by 12.30
3.pm leave work pick up kids go home (still hot)
the rest of the afternoon is after school snacks, homework,washing etc
5.pm husband comes home plays the computer i do baths, dinner then we both read with the kids finally they go to bed then it's my time, after cleaning up of course, my husband feeds the dogs makes a bottle to help me I go to bed usually by 11pm.
Saturdays is relaxation day nothing is done & Sunday is clean up from Saturday and our social day.The ages of my children are 6,5,4 & 1.5. I would love to hear a better soulution oh I have a gardner mow the lawns gardening is not my husbands forte. He likes my cooking he is a white hetrosexual man who eats whatever I cook him - otherwise he might go hungry - unless of coarse he is feeling inventive and cooks, We have had take out twice this fortnight lucky me. But we are a partnership, but yes I would agree that women do most of the work well in my situation anyway.:-)

I would agree that a partnership is equal I think we all have our flaws and that we can irritate each other.

I also agree that women do do most of the domestic work _ I am a qualified domestic engineer.

My flaw would be that I'm a clean freak!

I can not tolerate mess and disorder whereas my husband can.

He is quite content to let the kids try and kill each other make science experiments in the kitchen, re-arrange their bedrooms or dressup the dogs oh and leave the dinner dishes to the next morning.

Whereas I would like to see my children grow up I dont like opening the fridge to find cofee, cordial, milk and leftovers mixed togeather after a few days, It takes more time to get the children to actually clean their rooms than to mess it, I know the dogs dont like wearing clothes, shoes or makeup (they have told me this) and have you ever tried to wash a sauce and mashed potato covered plate the next day - again it takes quite as long.