Toni Lavis

‘However, some people desire it more than others and there is a huge smegging heap of research to back up the popularly held belief that men (on average) desire sex more than women (on average).’

Really? And what is that ‘research’ based on? Asking men how they feel about sex. And what is the main influence on how men feel about sex? Cultural messages that keep telling men that they need lots and lots and lots of sex. And LOTS and LOTS more. The more the better.

And if they don’t quite hear the message, then don’t worry. It’s subliminally repeated about a thousand times a day – through visual and written imagery, through film and television, through advertisements, through news articles, through novels, art, music, historical stories and just about every other kind of cultural megaphone you can shake a stick at.

Hell! If I had been raised a man in this society, I’d be wanting sex every day, several times a day … and then some. Gimme a woman … NOW!

Also, you seem to have spent an enormous amount of time over the last few days, doing all kinds of polls among your friends and acquaintances regarding my previous post. Isn’t it fortunate that they all confirmed your own views about sex and universally rubbished my arguments? You obviously choose your friends and acquaintances well.

‘Even if the sex is lousy, why do women masturbate less than men?’

WTF?!? Ahem … on what scientific methodology do you measure this statistic? ‘Mrs Beaton’s Book of Household Management’?

phanto

'If they are in a domestic relationship then there is a one in three chance of them being victims of violence. They are the odds and anyone who plays with those odds is a fool.'

Well ... yes. But there is a two in three chance of NOT being a victim of violence. Why assume that a woman wanting a soul-mate, to start a family and have financial security is a fool? Most men want these things too.

Even so, I understand what you say. At least you are one of the few posters here who recognises that women are the main victims of domestic violence, even though I don't agree with your premise that their own resentments and romantic disappointments may contribute to their victimhood.

Rhian

For years, I've been posting comments that refute R0bert's ongoing links to research based on Conflicts Tactics Scale methodology every time a DV thread appears on OLO.

(Sorry, R0bert. I don't mean to talk about you in front of you. I'm just addressing Rhian about your posts.)

Conflicts Tactics Scale (CTS) is a methodology that relies almost entirely on subjective recall by voluntary interviewees of particular incidents of violence with an intimate partner, usually within the 12 months prior to the interview. It's a minefield of statistical distortion. Yet, it's been around since the 1980s and is still being used as a measure for proving 'symmetrical' domestic violence across the genders. For obvious reasons, it's particularly popular on MRA blogs and websites.

However, common sense dictates that when a violent incident occurs between two people, both parties engage in violent activity. CTS leaves no room to distinguish between offensive and defensive violence.

I believe, as do many others, that CTS 'research' and its premise that women are almost as, indeed equally, violent as men is part of an ongoing campaign to derail the feminist campaign against domestic violence on women. For the first time in history, and due to the proliferation of female journalists in the mainstream media, domestic violence is no longer being reported from a purely male perspective. The issue is finally being reported by women, about women and for women.

//And what is the main influence on how men feel about sex?//

Hormones. Which, incidentally, is the main influence on how women feel about sex. A hormone is any member of a class of signalling molecules produced by glands in multicellular organisms that are transported by the circulatory system to target distant organs to regulate physiology and behaviour.

Males and females have different reproductive glands, which produce different reproductive hormones, which influence their sexual behaviour in different ways. This ain't quantum electrodynamics, Killa.

//Cultural messages that keep telling men that they need lots and lots and lots of sex.//

Really? I must have missed those. Because I don't feel that I need lots and lots of sex. Or maybe I'm still subjected the same cultural pressures and my relatively low testosterone levels have more effect on my non-stereotypical libido.

// It’s subliminally repeated about a thousand times a day – through visual and written imagery, through film and television, through advertisements, through news articles, through novels, art, music, historical stories and just about every other kind of cultural megaphone you can shake a stick at.//

Subliminal messaging, eh Killa? How very convenient: stimuli that lie behold the threshold of conscious perception, so we can't spot them even if we're looking for them. Which means they may not actually be there at all, and there's no way to know the difference. Except of course from the evidence of the behavioural effects that they produce in men.

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Ever heard of Ockham's razor, Killa? Non sunt multiplicanda entia sine necessitate; introducing the concept of subliminal messaging to influence male sexual behaviour hidden in all our entertainment is multiplying entities beyond necessity, and drawing a very long bow in my opinion. That's almost heading into tinfoil hat territory - conspiracy theorists love wild conjecture about unnamed, shadowy figures manipulating our behaviour without our being aware of it.

//Also, you seem to have spent an enormous amount of time over the last few days, doing all kinds of polls among your friends and acquaintances regarding my previous post.//

Yeah, I figured why bother with this awesome technology at my fingertips to ask a few questions of a few friends I'd be chatting to anyway? So I decided to forgo the convenience and simplicity of the interweb instead and use carrier pigeons instead. Took me forever.

//You obviously choose your friends and acquaintances well.//

Life's too short to have dicks for friends, Killa. You don't get as much choice about your acquaintances unfortunately.

//WTF?!? Ahem … on what scientific methodology do you measure this statistic?//

I believe they generally use surveys. It's not foolproof but the alternatives wouldn't get ethics approval. There are variety of methods that can be employed to help ensure that participants give truthful responses to questions asked such as the 'bogus pipeline'.

I am sick to death with over the top and unbalanced assaults on males.

Given small to minute families with girls are trained to fear / disdain males it is little wonder males are keeping them at arms length. Living with, or god forbid marrying a "WWW" wealthy, white, woman fixated on first world problems is just insanity.