Thanks Killarney, you have it all covered for OTB's 'stats'.
Nothing anyone can say will change the minds of misogynists like him though.

As I have said many times before, I am only interested in Australian crime statistics, and they tell us that vastly more numbers of women and men are killed and badly injured by other men than they are by women.

It goes without saying that any sane person would look to dealing with the main perpetrators of violence in our society before moving on to the other perpetrators.

Once we have stopped the killing of women by their 'intimate' partners every week of the year, then maybe we can start looking at the wider picture of domestic violence.
Murder is murder.....it is far more serious than all other forms of domestic violence.

I would like to ask the women in this discussion exactly what they hope to achieve by being involved. It seems to me that their only contribution is to keep re-iterating the facts over and over again that men are violent towards women. Statistics, personal anecdotes and studies are presented which all state the same thing. Men are violent towards women and it is their responsibility to stop this. It is nothing more than nagging. Constantly pointing out the problem and laying the blame solely at the feet of men. Well all that is a given. Men are violent towards women and their behaviour is their responsibility. What does it profit anyone to keep going on and on about it?

Surely if their concern for women was genuine they would be doing everything in their power to discourage women from entering into situations that are inherently dangerous for them. They would be agitating for the removal of TV shows like the Bachelor which glamorises domestic bliss when in reality domestic relationships are the very places where women have a 30 per cent chance of being beaten. Who in their right mind would not find such a show deeply objectionable? Why aren’t these women going to schools and warning girls not to enter such a dangerous situation? Why are they not picketing and protesting outside the offices of women’s magazines who are constantly encouraging women to enter and maintain domestic situations with men. All their energy should be going into protecting women not into blaming men. Blaming achieves absolutely nothing.

Perhaps they are not so interested in the welfare of women and their real motivation is to appease some personal need by blaming men. It is the act of blaming itself that seems to provide some perverse pleasure for them. Could it be that they are not interested in the question of domestic violence at all but just want to jump on any bandwagon that gives them the opportunity to join with a mob that has a desperate need to convince themselves of the fundamental badness of men?

Hi Phanto,

Perhaps an answer to your questions is: that many women like men, and vice versa. We give each other the benefit of the doubt, particularly before any sign of brutality manifests itself. Not many people can know, before they enter into a long-term relationship, whether or not they might be one of the 30 % minority who have their dreams betrayed.

Was that your best shot ? That women complain too much about being beaten ? Why don't they just shut up and put up with it ? After all, kids and all, they've got themselves into a predicament that is too inconvenient for most men to do anything about, so they've got only themselves to blame ? Is that it ?

Phanto, keep your partner away from sharp objects, especially at night :)

Joe

<Perhaps they are not so interested in the welfare of women and their real motivation is to <appease some personal need by blaming men.
< a desperate need to convince themselves of the fundamental badness of men?
<Posted by phanto, Wednesday, 27 August 2014 10:58:11 AM

Sounds pretty true to me.

The point is most people say they want DV that results in physical injury or death to stop, which is fair enough.

Sadly though a whole number of issues tend not to be addressed and get put under the umbrella of DV or IPV

Issues like mental illness, drug and alcohol abuse. From what I understand is that men make the largest percentage of psychopaths. However it could be that female psychopaths are better at not being detected. Not to mention acquired brain injury.

It is not unknown for people who are experiencing mania or psychosis to injury or kill someone. Yet this data gets included into the umbrella of DV/IPV. There are a number of media stories about families trying to get a family member to be treated, only to be turned away by the services, and tragically someone ends up getting killed.

Older people who are suffering from dementia can be violent and cause physical injury.

So in reality it is not so simple to address this issue, and we still haven't moved very far and refuse to examine interpersonal dynamics and how these dynamics may contribute to the escalation to physical violence.

What's the point of punishing some one after they have committed an offence, would it be much better for everyone if the offence had not been committed in the first place?

Hi Wolly B,

"What's the point of punishing some one after they have committed an offence, would it be much better for everyone if the offence had not been committed in the first place?"

Good point, but this is perhaps why a breach of an AVO needs to be considered an offence worth 'naming and shaming' - it may perhaps indicate a willingness to disregard the law (after all, an AVO is 'the law') and escalate a situation. As you say, better to get in first and nip it in the bud than to let it go on to something worse the next time.

Cheers,

Joe