ROber t - I was not the aggressor.

This comment "Wouldn’t it have been easier just to have his still hot dinner on the table when he got home from work?" clearly shows the attitude some people have towards women. Nowhere in the marriage ceremony does it state,that women are to be slaves. As a human being, I have the same right to personal fulfillment as a male does, that includes education and employment. What utter selfishness. Hopefully,with education, this sexist attitude to girls and women will go, and people who think like that will be 'out of step' with community values.
Will you educate your daughters? Or believe, like the views up to the 1970's, that girls don't need educating to be wives and mothers? I reject that view.
WRD is just the first of 16 days(25Nov-10Dec) set aside by the UNITED NATIONS to raise awareness to eliminate all forms of violence towards girls and women, who are the receivers of the majority of violence - BY THOSE WHO PROFESS TO LOVE THEM!
Do the anti WRD people know how and why this day came about?
If people think it's OK for a bloke who's at least 30 cms taller, over 30 klgs heavier to whack a small woman around the head because she's been sitting with her dying father, or taking her little mum home, or stuck in traffic due to car accident, or doing the shopping, then I have nothing further to add - in fact, it's this sort of attitude that is part of the reason why the situation has escallated to today's stats.
People with attitudes like some presented here, are part of the problem.It's been proven,that men who bash their wives rarely assault their workmates, neighbours or friends? Just their wives/partners? Why?they think they 'own' them! They do not!
If you can show me, that every 7-10 days a man is murdered by his partner, please do so. The fact is, that they are not!

Liz45:"liminate all forms of violence towards girls and women, who are the receivers of the majority of violence -"

I dispute this. Prove your claim.

"If people think it's OK for a bloke who's at least 30 cms taller, over 30 klgs heavier to whack a small woman around the head because she's been sitting with her dying father, or taking her little mum home, or stuck in traffic due to car accident, or doing the shopping"

And just who has suggested that? The closest would be Roscop's comment which I don't recall seeing anybody else supporting. If you check my posting history you will see that I have been critical of Roscop previously for generalised comments about women. I'm getting a bit tired of the men being criticised if we don't police one anothers comments and clearly repudiate any which go to far while the women generally stay silent in the face of similar bitter tactics.

Your dislike of men and willingness to believe the worst of us is disgusting.

Perhaps you could clarify something - who was the first to take arguments to a physical level in your altercations with your ex? Your earlier wording left me with the sense that it might have been you regardless of who you considered was the aggressor. You've still not said why there was you might technically have assaulted him..

R0bert

Liz

"If people think it's OK for a bloke who's at least 30 cms taller, over 30 klgs heavier to whack a small woman around the head because she's been sitting with her dying father, or taking her little mum home, or stuck in traffic due to car accident, or doing the shopping, then I have nothing further to add"

That comment explains why men on this site feel a need to speak out. For a generation, we have been fed unrealistic depictions of DV that are carefully designed to make female participants look as victim-like as possible. The scenarios that you depict bear little resemblence to DV as it happens in the real world and it is of concern that so many people, such as yourself, have such an ignorant view of DV.

In the real world, everyone occasionally has had an argument. Most of us back off when it becomes too heated. Some people won't or cannot de-escelate arguments. These arguments spiral out of control. This depiction may not support the female victim/male agressor (false) dichotomy, but represents all that we understand about how DV occurs in the real world.

Do you want to understand and fix this problem, or just have an excuse to look down on these men?

Some people just don't or don't want to get it. those who do and speak out strongly in support of abused women, thank you. I don't have the time or the inclination to put up all sorts of reports, surveys or UN information. Like my ex-husband, it still would not be sufficient.You don't want to know the reality!
Men like my ex-husband are sociopaths. Did I realise this while I was living the life of one subjected to daily terrorism? No!That is why they're so dangerous and crippling of ones self esteem. They are driven by a need to control - always/everything. Whether it's inflicting fear via physical assault; or removing self esteem by continued humiliation; or embarrassing people in front of others, strangers or friends-no matter; or whether it's using a mother's love to ridicule her for being distressed after a life threatening health crisis over OUR child - day by day, event after event makes you realise, that you are never meant to win-you don't deserve even the most basic concern or compassion, and that his withdrawal is a total lack of real love or empathy. I can not recall one kindness by him?

The more I loved the person in crisis, my parents or my babies, his cruelty was at its extreme. He demanded everything for himself; meals on time(his time)university education(while every hurdle was put in my way,just to do a sewing course) employment; parenting; housework, regardless of whether I was sick or not? He was a Hitler of the home - a worthy community member outside of it?His comment when I asked him why, was 'it's the only language you understand'? Obviously so worthless to warant a semblance of respect or care - forget love!

Liz45, the whole point is that the vast majority of men are not like that, even a little bit. Making laws that treat every man as though he was like that is simply stupid and counter-productive.