interesting comments thus far and much appreciated.

I was hoping that we could broaden out this discussion
and consider the hurdles that stand in the way of
marriages whether it is older women marrying younger men
or older men marrying younger women. Why is it that many
people are far more accepting in our society of older men marrying younger women than we are of older women
marrying younger men ?

Is it because traditionally men were seen as the family
providers? I'd be interested to hear your views.
Perhaps I didn't properly phrase my initial question in this
discussion.

My guess is that traditionally (virtually from the beginning of humankind) men have been regarded as the provider and protector of his partner. It somewhat follows that being older offers more chance to develop the necessary skills, strength and financial comfort to fulfil the role.

Rightly or wrongly, seeing a younger man with a noticeably older woman looks like he's with his mother, which inturn generates suspicion about his intentions; and her's also.

I'm pretty traditional when it comes to relationships. When I've seen interviews with 'Cougars', they all look like desperate woman who refuse to accept they are past their youthful peak.

I don't really care who dates or marries who, of any sex, but any pairing of people I see in public that looks unnatural to me, looks just that - unnatural and therefore odd.

One offer observation is that young guys, especially if they are good looking, will likely always have one eye open for a fresh score. The older woman may be in for a heartbreak if she is taking the relationship more serious than her young lover. The older woman / younger man scenario looks like a recipe for eventual disaster... e.g Demi More

I am married because of US law. My wife came from Norway to the US to be with me. In order for her to stay longer we had to get married although both of us would have been happy just to live together. Both of us had been married before and were not eager to do it again. She had grown up and gone to university in Australia before she went to Europe. When I retired she wanted to go home to Australia. Since she came to the US for me I came to Australia for her. Here we are, and we have been together for almost 35 years. Guess we'll stay married till we are parted by death.

A funny coincidence just happened, Gene Simmons (Kiss) was just interviewed on the dreaded FOX about this very topic.

Gene's advise to women is don't trust men, especially younger men; younger men are too immature and financially insecure to be trusted in a mature relationship. Younger men will eventually cheat. Younger men will only be in a relationship with an older woman for two reasons - sex and money.

Simmons' advice to older women contemplating getting into a relationship with a young man; don't!

Foxy, I would say it has something to do with the fact that girls mature faster than boys. Traditionally a 21 year old male would be seen as being at the same level of maturity as an 18 year old female. People married at much younger ages in the past, than they do today, and females produced children at a much younger age than today. The need for large families was also a factor, no good having your first child at 30 if you intend to have 8 of them. In olden day times like the (early) 20th century a man would see himself as well established by the age of 30, most likely in employment he intended to pursue for the next 30 odd years, his wife, no "partners" then, would already have produced 3 or 4 children. In those times, even in the poorest of households a girl had to be seen as "suitable" ie suitable to the future parents in-laws, an older woman may not have fallen into that category.

Excellent posts from ConservativeHippie, Paul, and of
course David F.

I'm a bit of a traditionalist as well - regarding older
women marrying younger men.
To me it just doesn't
seem right and the "mother" image does come to mind.
Still I guess there's always the exception.

I got married quite
young - I simply fell in love and that was it. He's older
than me - and we've been married for quite a few decades
and I dare say that we shall remain married until we die.

We got married because that was what was acceptable at
the time. Plus being young I wanted to be a bride and have
the beautiful ceremony and celebration.

I couldn't image doing it with a man younger than myself.
I doubt whether we would have that much in common - but
I suppose I should not pre-judge these situations.