I've just been reading a magazine article where
the film actor Richard Gere, 65, and his girlfriend
have been happily in love for a year.

According to the article, the actor who set women's
hearts racing in the '80s and '90s with his roles in
"An Officer and a Gentleman," and "Pretty Woman," is dating
Spanish socialite, Alejandra Silva, 32.

Then there's Chris Martin (Coldplay's frontman), 38, and
Kylie Minogue, 47.

And I thought it might be interesting to see what the posters
on OLO thought of older women marrying (or even dating)
younger men?

Does age matter in any serious relationship?

Your thoughts please.

Well, Foxy, I can speak on this with some insight; when I was born my mother was 41 and my father was 31, they had married in 1931, and my elder brother was born a year later.
They were a loving couple and there was never a cross word in our home, except those directed at me (with justification!!).
Only once did Dad come home a bit under the weather and Mum said to me "That's the first time in 40 years that your father has come home like that"
She was upset, so I said that it was cause for congratulation as to some that we knew well it was a weekly happening.
She died at 85 and he died a year later, he told me not long before that he didn't want to live without her; so he gradually faded away.

Their's was a love match that lasted.

Now the Dad was no saint before he married and as a child I was always fascinated by a depression in his right hand that I could put my finger in.
Years later when I was a man myself, he told me that it was a bullet wound. He was working mates with a chap on the North Coast, and this bloke was always trying to get him to come and meet some of his 'girlfriends'.
When he found out that the father was having it off with his sister, he came at dad with a short barreled revolver and dad pushed it aside as he fired, hence the 'dimple' in the hand.

I've known a number of couples where the woman was older and they all seemed successful, so I'd have to vote in favour.

//Does age matter in any serious relationship?//

I guess it depends on how you define a serious relationship.

Anna Nicole Smith married J. Howard Marshall when she was 26 and he was 89. Gabbi Grecko married Geoffrey Edelsten when she was 25 and he was 71.

I am 30, and quite attracted to one of the bar staff at my local club. Let's call her 'Anne'. She's at least 10 years my elder, and I'd have her in a heartbeat if she'd have me but she doesn't seem interested :(

Can't win 'em all.

So I quite like the thought of older women dating younger men; marriage is a more difficult question.

Of course, it could just be lust and not and not love. Is my wanting to get into Anne's pants any better than Anna Nicole Smith wanting to get into her husband's bank account?

Dear Foxy,

1. "Should older women be allowed to marry younger men?"

Absolutely! Nobody should be forcibly prevented from marrying anyone(s) and/or anything(s) of their choosing.

2. "Does age matter in any serious relationship?"

Only superficially: as age is a property of our human bodies, only the superficial human aspect of the relationship can be affected by age.
Given that the relationship is indeed serious, it is not based on the bodies we currently happen to have, so age doesn't matter significantly.

Dear Foxy,
I am five years older than my husband, and we have been married 27 years, so I would have to say it is fine for younger men to marry older women!
I don't think a really large age gap of 30 or more years difference in age either way is a good idea though. One always ends up as a carer at a young age it seems.

Personally, even a huge amount of money would not get me to agree to marry/sleep with a man hugely older than me though....just thinking about the Geoffrey Edelsten saga makes me shudder.

"Should older women be allowed to marry younger men?"

What a very odd question. What is preventing them? -Apart from not receiving the offers that is.

It is the role-reversal fantasy of the feminists of the previous millenium that predatory Cougars might take advantage of young men. Not happening in any significant numbers though, despite the odd speculative Hollywood movie.

On the other hand, mature men are embarrassed by choice and not limited by any means to women approaching their age.

It is all down to Mother Nature. Thanks, Dear :)

The recently married Gabi Grecko, 26, and Geoffrey Edelsten, 72, are celebrating some more special news — they’re reportedly having a baby. A match made in heaven, no less, I can see them both spending their twilight years in happy matrimonial bliss. Geoff in his yellow suit and Gabi in her orange hair!

Read all about it.

http://www.news.com.au/entertainment/celebrity-life/gabi-grecko-edelsten-pregnant-geoffrey-edelstens-bride-reveals-baby-joy/story-fnk825aa-1227397465324

p/s The Doc's doing it tough, he is an undischarged bankrupt. LOL

Grecko feels the inexorable passage of time as old age creeps up on her.

Thank You all for your great responses.

There's heaps of examples of great marriages where
age does not seem to have been a stumbling block.
From celebrities to ordinary folk. We have a relative
who's been married now for some 25 years and his wife is
eight years older than him. On the other side of the
coin my husband is much older than me - and he's the
love of my life.

However, I have to admit that I do find it somewhat disturbing
for a much, much, older woman to marry a very young man.
To me that's "cradle-snatching."
I feel that there would be a very large gap in their interests,
outlooks, and range of experiences.
But again, I guess it all depends on the people themselves.
Although a "mother" and "son" image does come to mind.
I also found Hugh Hefner's appetite for young women somewhat
unreal. It was almost as if it was all a façade.
There was a sense of unreality about it.

It should... God created Adam THEN Eve! So all women should be younger than the head of the household!

Not that I believe that, though.

"Does age matter in any serious relationship?"

It should not, but I can imagine health issues might.

For example, for younger men it might be important that the older woman has acute angina.

I was just reading WmTrevor's comment when I noticed an ad on OLO for "Russian Senior Dating For Men' at russianwomandate.com with a big 'Join Now' button, in the pic I assume the girl was about 20 and I assume Russian all I noticed about her was I think she is wearing pink nail polish. Boy, has not Olga From The Volga sure changed since the downfall of the Soviet Union, she use to look like Big Uries ugly sister, with muscles, but now hummm, must be all that capitalist living. LOL

"Hugh Hefner's appetite for young women"

What about the appetite of the many women who have taken advantage of Hefner?

The risk for women is very much the same. There are plenty of 'bad boys' who are on the lookout for a successful women to sponge off. Over the years I have had a number of female friends who have been taken in by scoundrels who are too lazy to provide for themselves. It is rather common for women who have put their all into education and career. There are rough types who know how to pull their strings.

Doubtless the push by some gays and lesbians for same sex marriage is to take advantage of the same opportunities(sic).

Before trashing the Marriage Act it is high time that the contract itself be scrutinised through full, real and due consultation with the public and NOT just anonymous activists and lobbyists.

I believe for instance that a marriage should be dissolved by the written will with due notice of thirty days, by either of the parties. No court, no State intervention, except in the case of a disputed notice, which can be handled by an already existing civil tribunal.

As well, spousal benefits that are supported by taxing others should be reviewed for cost/benefit to all. It is not fair nor reasonable for example, that married (incl de facto!) public servants obtain entitlements that other workers, particularly young workers, are obliged to pay for and limit their own capacity to provide for themselves.

Young workers are being obliged to undertake long education and pay for it themselves. It is grossly unfair that they are also being required to pay for Ms Gillard's de facto to take a well-known instance for argument. Or for the spouse travel of any of her parliamentary colleagues and bureaucrats. Where many young workers are struggling, it is middle class greed that dictates that such spousal and child benefits should be the paid for by others.

Dear Paul,

Having some Russian blood running through my veins -
I can proudly give credit to my killer cheek-bones,
mane of red hair, slender physique, long legs, and
tall height, to my Russian ancestry. Plus of course
my stubborn-streak, and a huge emotional appetite.
I love tenderness. But it's the rarest emotion one
encounters.

I guess people either connect or they don't.

I've been reading a few websites on this subject
and there was one that made me think that
listed some of the hurdles that should be considered
before older women choose to marry younger men.

The first was - what will people say?
If you're the type of person that's concerned
about what our society may think - the suggestion
is you'd better give it some more thought before you
proceed because no matter how modern we think we are
in this day and age - there will always be those who
won't approve. Of course if you don't give a hoot about
what others think - this won't matter to you.

The other hurdle is the maturity factor. Men tend to
mature later than women - so we're told. Again I guess
it all depends on how you feel about all this - and
also your choice in partner may well be a very mature
young man.

Then there's the compatability factor. What do you really
have in common. There's the friends factor. Will there be
friends on both sides that you will feel comfortable with?
There's the income factor. Chances are you'll already be
well established in your profession - he many not be.
You may be earning more than him. Will this be a problem.

There's also the children factor that needs to be considered.

And of course the commitment factor. Can you see this
relationship lasting for the rest of your life.

If after reviewing all these hurdles - you still want to
go ahead - go for it!

As one website stated - "Being loved so completely
by someone - your age doesn't matter on bit and in the
end that makes up for everything else.

Or does it?

"Should older women be allowed to marry younger men?"

Who's stopping them?

My grandfather was 12 years older than my grandmother, she was 18 when they married and he 30 and I personally know two couples with similar age gaps, one 15 years, he 55 she 40 and another 60 and 47.I've advised my daughters that if they want kids in their twenties to consider a man in his thirties but the same advice wouldn't apply if I had sons. There is a biological clock where women are concerned, for a host of reasons it's better for women to give birth in their late teens or early twenties and finding a man that age who is a good provider is harder than ever these days. We also have to face the fact that in 2015 men are living almost 20 years longer than their great grandfathers and their adolescence can last from around ten years old to their late twenties.

There is no shift towards young men dating older women. It is just more feminist role-reversal idealism.

There has always been the odd exception, probably fewer these days than post-WW2 when people were locked more into their small towns and local 'burbs.

Would be users? Yes, always plenty of them around and not limited by gender.

Where young men are being accused by women of 'lacking commitment' and opting out of marriage, it is ludicrous to suggest that young men would be preferring to marry middle-aged and elderly women instead.

Foxy,
Forget the older women marrying younger men
and concentrate on those older, latent pedophile
men marrying those Asian petite lookalike schoolgirls
What an affront to Aussie women.
Or is it just a way to pander to a fetish without the
prospect of prison time?

interesting comments thus far and much appreciated.

I was hoping that we could broaden out this discussion
and consider the hurdles that stand in the way of
marriages whether it is older women marrying younger men
or older men marrying younger women. Why is it that many
people are far more accepting in our society of older men marrying younger women than we are of older women
marrying younger men ?

Is it because traditionally men were seen as the family
providers? I'd be interested to hear your views.
Perhaps I didn't properly phrase my initial question in this
discussion.

My guess is that traditionally (virtually from the beginning of humankind) men have been regarded as the provider and protector of his partner. It somewhat follows that being older offers more chance to develop the necessary skills, strength and financial comfort to fulfil the role.

Rightly or wrongly, seeing a younger man with a noticeably older woman looks like he's with his mother, which inturn generates suspicion about his intentions; and her's also.

I'm pretty traditional when it comes to relationships. When I've seen interviews with 'Cougars', they all look like desperate woman who refuse to accept they are past their youthful peak.

I don't really care who dates or marries who, of any sex, but any pairing of people I see in public that looks unnatural to me, looks just that - unnatural and therefore odd.

One offer observation is that young guys, especially if they are good looking, will likely always have one eye open for a fresh score. The older woman may be in for a heartbreak if she is taking the relationship more serious than her young lover. The older woman / younger man scenario looks like a recipe for eventual disaster... e.g Demi More

I am married because of US law. My wife came from Norway to the US to be with me. In order for her to stay longer we had to get married although both of us would have been happy just to live together. Both of us had been married before and were not eager to do it again. She had grown up and gone to university in Australia before she went to Europe. When I retired she wanted to go home to Australia. Since she came to the US for me I came to Australia for her. Here we are, and we have been together for almost 35 years. Guess we'll stay married till we are parted by death.

A funny coincidence just happened, Gene Simmons (Kiss) was just interviewed on the dreaded FOX about this very topic.

Gene's advise to women is don't trust men, especially younger men; younger men are too immature and financially insecure to be trusted in a mature relationship. Younger men will eventually cheat. Younger men will only be in a relationship with an older woman for two reasons - sex and money.

Simmons' advice to older women contemplating getting into a relationship with a young man; don't!

Foxy, I would say it has something to do with the fact that girls mature faster than boys. Traditionally a 21 year old male would be seen as being at the same level of maturity as an 18 year old female. People married at much younger ages in the past, than they do today, and females produced children at a much younger age than today. The need for large families was also a factor, no good having your first child at 30 if you intend to have 8 of them. In olden day times like the (early) 20th century a man would see himself as well established by the age of 30, most likely in employment he intended to pursue for the next 30 odd years, his wife, no "partners" then, would already have produced 3 or 4 children. In those times, even in the poorest of households a girl had to be seen as "suitable" ie suitable to the future parents in-laws, an older woman may not have fallen into that category.

Excellent posts from ConservativeHippie, Paul, and of
course David F.

I'm a bit of a traditionalist as well - regarding older
women marrying younger men.
To me it just doesn't
seem right and the "mother" image does come to mind.
Still I guess there's always the exception.

I got married quite
young - I simply fell in love and that was it. He's older
than me - and we've been married for quite a few decades
and I dare say that we shall remain married until we die.

We got married because that was what was acceptable at
the time. Plus being young I wanted to be a bride and have
the beautiful ceremony and celebration.

I couldn't image doing it with a man younger than myself.
I doubt whether we would have that much in common - but
I suppose I should not pre-judge these situations.

Paul1405, "I would say it has something to do with the fact that girls mature faster than boys. Traditionally a 21 year old male would be seen as being at the same level of maturity as an 18 year old female"

Girls have smaller brains too. So what?

As if those sexual variations noted in MRIs and by crude observation have anything but the slightest effect and probably unnoticeable in practical terms.

'Scientific' deduction of the tabloids who are prone to making the news would have it differently. They would find significance where the scientists are long on the rather obvious limitations of the findings. The tabloids feed the old fishwives' and other dullard's myths and expectations, through confirming negative and positive stereotyping of the sexes.

Almost as reliable as the pop psychology paperbacks seen in airline terminal newsagents.

Most research findings reported as news by the media are simply 'interesting' and are only worthwhile as possibilities (often unlikely) for further research.

Paul1405, "The need for large families was also a factor, no good having your first child at 30 if you intend to have 8 of them"

It was Roman Catholic edicts aimed at increasing their flock to dominate Australian politics and unavailability of reliable contraception that increased Australian families. Both negative effects on women are reduced markedly by (1) freedom of speech, (2) removing oppressive censorship and (3) free access to improved contraception (and abortion). Hence the freedom of speech (anti-censorship) movement of the Sixties. Also the immediate take-up of The Pill, which the cynical, bullying Catholic Church fought against tooth and claw.

Of course some lobbyists and political parties would negate that desirable self-limitation of population growth and sustainability by throwing open Australia's doors to the irresponsible ferals from Third World countries whose personal mission is to dominate and knock up every female they come across.

I've done a bit of Googling and was quite surprised to
find quite a list of famous people - older women
who have married younger men. I'll list just a few of them:

5 years older -
Princess Anne - Timothy Lawrence
Goldie Hawn - Kurt Russell

10 years older -
Madonna - Guy Ritchie
Priscilla Presley - Marco Garibaldi

12 years older -
Susan Sarandon - Tim Robbins

13 years older -
Deborra-Lee Furness - Hugh Jackman

16 years older -
Ruth Gordon - Garson Kanin

18 years older -
Mary Tyler Moore- S. Robert Levine

20 years older -
Dinah Shore - Burt Reynolds
Elizabeth Taylor - Larry Forensky

23 years older -
Ivana Trump - Roesano Rubicon

31 years older -
Ellen Barkin - Sam Levinson

32 Years older -
Joan Collins - Percy Gibson

And there's heaps more on the web.

I guess one size does not fit all - when it comes to age and
love.

Some tribal people favour marriages with a disparity of age in both directions. Young men marry much older women, and young women marry much older men. That results in most people having at least two marriages during their life time and a lower birth rate as fertility of one of the partners is usually limited.

An example is the Tiwi in the northern Territory.

Perhaps it should be encouraged worldwide as a means of curbing the population increase.

Cub or sea cow, eh? Fortunately there are laws.

Feminist guru Germaine Greer held that she should decide age of consent, not the law. She published a book, The Beautiful Boy that she described as, "full of pictures of 'ravishing' pre-adult boys with hairless chests, wide-apart legs and slim waists".

Germs had more to say, but best left alone.

On the other hand, Greer tried to suggest that a goodnight kiss from daddy is sexualization,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWq-avEfgdc

Dear David,

In modern industrialised societies, we generally
assume that married partners should be adults of
much the same age, although certain exceptions are
made for an older man and a younger woman
However, some societies offer strikingly contrasting
patterns. I've done some research and it seems that
the Kadara of Nigeria marry infants to one another.
The Chuckchee of Siberia, believing that parental care
is the best way of cementing the marriage bond, allow
adult women to marry males of only two or three years
of age; the new wives then look after the boys until
they are old enough to assume their hudbandly duties.

And as you've pointed out - the Tiwi of Australia, adult
males marry females even before they are conceived, annulling
the marriage if the newborn turns out to be the wrong sex.

//Rightly or wrongly, seeing a younger man with a noticeably older woman looks like he's with his mother, which inturn generates suspicion about his intentions; and her's also.//

Rightly or wrongly, seeing a younger woman with a noticeably older man look's like she's with her father, which in turn generates suspicion about his intentions; and his' also.

//I don't really care who dates or marries who, of any sex, but any pairing of people I see in public that looks unnatural to me, looks just that - unnatural and therefore odd.//

Is that which is 'odd' is and 'unnatural' necessarily contemptible?

My biggest hero of all time is Henry Cavendish. By contemporary accounts, he was a very odd man. So odd that he didn't publish most of his work. He discovered Ampere's Law and Coulomb's Law before they were named by other people but he never sought to publish.

So odd that he always took the same route at the same time for his evening walk, walking in the middle of the road to avoid confrontation. Until he realised the townsfolk had figured out his routine and were gathering to stare at the 'unnatural' freak, and changed his schedule to walk under the cover of darkness.

So odd that he would leave written instructions for his housekeeper to avoid having to talk to her; when she surprised him on the stairs one night he forked out to have a second staircase installed so that it might never happen again.

He was one of the best chemists of his age, and probably the best experimental physicist who has ever lived.

But he was quite weird, and so we should shun him accordingly, right?

That is how it works, yeah? Weird people and their weird ideas never have the potential to advance society, and so we should shun them and their un-traditional ideas.

OTB,

"It was Roman Catholic edicts aimed at increasing their flock to dominate Australian politics and unavailability of reliable contraception that increased Australian families."

Funnily enough my first ancestors in Australia were C of E and Presbyterian and there were 10 children in each family.
The first C of E ancestor born in Aust. had 9 plus an adopted daughter (who was the natural sister of my father and the adopted sister of my mother).

The Catholic families all had a few less and less again in each generation.

Family numbers dropped as economic security increased, social services, until recent times, were the best limiters of families.

Not that I don't agree that the Catholic Church was/is wrong to oppose contraception.

//The Catholic families all had a few less and less again in each generation.//

But in defense of us Micks: my favourite priest (a mick) is nine of nine. I am five of five (penternary adjunct of unimatrix 42, ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha). My mum is one of seven, and her dad didn't get married until he was forty (40!). And still fathered six more children after mum. We may be late bloomers, but apparently we bloom fruitfully.

//Not that I don't agree that the Catholic Church was/is wrong to oppose contraception.//

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUspLVStPbk

Every sperm is sacred
Every sperm is good
Every sperm is needed
In your neighbour'ood

Ia Mise, "Funnily enough my first ancestors in Australia were C of E and Presbyterian and there were 10 children in each family"

Agreed and already covered, "and unavailability of reliable contraception that increased Australian families".

Unless you are saying that mothers of large families were having those children by choice, which I would disagree with.

The ability of women to control contraception was a precondition for the emancipation of women. Added to by the availability of abortion on demand.

Sorry, I only just noticed the glaring mathematical error that might have led some people to conclude that my granddad was 40! = 815915283247897734345611269596115894272000000000 years old when he got married. If they don't know the approximate age of the universe.

I wasn't using ! as the factorial symbol; when I said 40! I was expressing surprise because 40 is an old age at which to start fathering children. Apologies to anybody who may have misread my post.

I agree with Beach,

"The ability of women to control contraception was a precondition for the emancipation of women. Added to by the availability of abortion on demand."

Added to that is equality in education, which has in our society been achieved, along with equality in employment and income, which has improved markedly, but is yet to be fully achieved for women. Changes in social attitudes has gone a long way towards acceptance and allows women a far greater degree of independence than was once the case, when the independent woman was the rare exception and not the rule.

The modern 19th/20th century working class women, uneducated, no income, no family or government support, and a large brood of dependent children to fend for, had no chance for independence.
Interesting, when the Lang Labor Government of NSW in the 1920's introduced "Child Endowment" of 5/- a week, it was opposed by the Conservatives on the grounds that as Lang wanted it paid to mothers, it would act to make these mothers, "loose women"! Some unions also opposed such payments as possibly undermining the wages of men.

The age gap disparity, like most things sexual is based in biology. Women are fertile until 35 from when it drops off rapidly, whereas men remain fertile into their 70s.

Men were expected to have established their careers and to have demonstrated that they were capable of supporting a family, whilst girls were generally expected to be married by 20.

Prior to the 60s the most common cases of men marrying women significantly older than themselves was for the wealth of the woman, or sometimes as in the case of Catherine the great, who supposedly dated younger men the older she got, it was powerful women liberated enough to indulge their fancies.

As science is advancing the limitations on women are disappearing, and so too apparently are the old social norms.

Dear Paul,

The development and widespread availability of
contraceptives have potentially separated two
quite different functions of sexual relations -
procreation and recreation. And contraception
has had an enormous effect on the family system.

In the days when intercourse was likely to lead to
pregnancy, there was a strong practical incentive
for sex to be restricted to marital partners,
(our society made little provision for the proper
care of children born to unmarried mothers).
There was a stigma at that time -
attached to unmarried mothers.

Once the prospect of pregnancy was removed, many of the
inhabitions against the use of sex for recreation
disappeared.

The nuclear family was founded on the
assumption of monogamous fidelity, but with contraception
- permissiveness
encouraged quite a few people to look outside their marriages
for sexual satisfaction or, if they were unmarried, to
have sexual experiences before marriage.

This experience gave the partners a standard by which to
measure the performance of their spouses - an opportunity
that the partners in a traditional virgin marriage did not
have - and the spouses may have been found wanting.

Therefore changing sexual norms inevitably have had an
effect on the family system based on the previous
assumption that the partners would have an exclusive and
mutually gratifying sexual relationship.

Was it the author of Sex and the Single Girl, who was the editor of Cosmopolitan, who penned in a later book that women over fifty should have a go at sharing the husbands of their female friends, because their options were otherwise limited?

It is unusual for a young woman or young man to be interested in those past a certain age (regardless of age gap) without there being other incentives, such as a short cut to the benefits and lifestyle they desire but choose not to work for.

The same rule applies to homosexuals if the bonking and pairings of celebrities is any guide, and swapping sexual preference is no barrier, apparently.

We shouldn't think in terms of general categories
and use sweeping generalisations about any group.

Of course some people will tend to do that if only
to enable them to make sense of the world by
simplifying its complexity but we do need to remember
there are always individual differences and we should look
at each case on its own merits.

The reality is that
stereotypes have to be checked against reality.
Experiences have proven that individual cases often
contradict the rigid image we may have.

For many cases - there are always "exceptions to the rule."
That goes for older women and younger men and also for
older men and younger women.

One size does not fit all.

Foxy, congratulations, you've just undermined the philosophical basis of multiculturalism in one short post.
Explain in 300 words or less where you went wrong.

Fox,

Astounded that you would be so dismissive of Helen Gurley Brown. She was editor in chief of Cosmopolitan for over thirty years, having made it a success. Her 'Sex and the Single Girl' was highly popular with feminists.

Helen Brown was majorly responsible for opening the door for women to discuss sex and other issues of concern openly and frankly. When she was first interviewed she wasn't allowed to say 'sex' on the electronic media.

That was liberation.

She achieved much more than that dreadful, conceited, self-obsessed apparition Germs Greer who is the over-exposed darling of the ABC. From reading Greer one is quite surprised by her barely concealed superiority and arrogance towards less educated women (enlarge that to all women such is her ego), whom she patronises and scolds. Does Greer actually like women?

Helen Gurley Brown was always classy. She was happily married for fifty years too.

"Gurley Brown was an icon. Her formula for honest and straightforward advice about relationships, career and beauty revolutionized the magazine industry. She lived every day of her life to the fullest and will always be remembered as the quintessential 'Cosmo girl.' She will be greatly missed." [Frank Bennack Jr., CEO of Hearst Corporation in a statement]

Cosmopolitan did much more for young women than any of the over-paid, middle class educated feminists who have swung from the taxpayer's teat for scores of years in any of the Western democracies and particularly Australia, where the same old tiresome Emily's Listers elbow out any young blood.

otb,

The lady in question apparently promoted
the "fun, fearless, female,"
and a life-style for others that
led to countless personal tragedies
for women having casual sex - leading to unwanted pregnancies
and STDs. Her book has been described by many as -
"one of the most body sharing, insecurity provoking, long-lasting
sexist media products in the last 100 years."
"Sex and The Single Girl."
It was all a façade - but it made millions for her.
She died at the age of 90 a few years ago.
Her hang-ups I couldn't relate to at all.
A bit old-hat for my taste.
The same goes for Germaine Greer (her I can take in only
small doses).

Now Candice Bergman as Murphy Brown -
Yes - more like it.

cont'd ...

I forgot to add that Candice Bergman's husband -
French Director Louis Malle was 14 years older
then her when they married.
He died of cancer.

Candice Bergman and the character she acted, Murphy Brown, were dissimilar.

You might like to share Murphy Brown's life and demons, but Bergman wouldn't have.

otb,

The Murphy Brown character fitted Candice Bergen like
a glove and gave her permission to be "my brattiest,
bawdiest self," and so much, much more.

In her book, "A fine Romance," Candice goes into much
more detail.

Here's just a snippet from Vogue:

http://www.vogue.com/11777385/candice-bergen-a-fine-romance-excerpt/

You need to separate the screen character and actress's persona from the real person. She may have enjoyed the challenge and borrowed from her wildest imaginings, but quite obviously her own life choices were very different - of which her marriage is an example.

otb,

You need to read the link I gave you.
Candice Bergen sums up Murphy Brown and what she meant
to her quite succinctly in it.
"Right from the horses mouth."

As for her marriage? The first one was a love
affair.
Her second one is a different story.

If you're still in doubt about Ms Bergen - try to get a
hold of her book - "A Fine Romance."
It's very revealing - and gets rid of any false assumptions.

Once again as is my tradition on this forum -
I would like to Thank all those who
contributed.

For me this discussion has now
run its course.