Dear Suse,

Women are what they are. As are men.
And each of us have our individual differences.
(To be sure).

I am fortunate to have found a grown man who
was capable of loving fully, with all of his heart.
The most vital, playful, joyful human being, with
an energetic life force born of a strong family
upbringing. His honesty, devotion, and unconditional
love bind us together in an inseparable state of
familial bliss that's been unshaken to this day.
I'm very lucky.

Foxy, Tuesday, 24 November 2009 7:26:24 PM
http://forum.onlineopinion.com.au/thread.asp?discussion=3251&page=3

Foxy, Saturday, 11 September 2010 4:49:59 PM
http://forum.onlineopinion.com.au/thread.asp?discussion=3960

Maybe over-egging it a bit?

Meanwhile, back in the real world the better advice is that the "The One" truly wonderful partner doesn't exist. We should be expecting to maintain a large measure of our own individual space and interests. We are all the better partners for being adult and for maintaining some separate life, friends, finance/assets (structure accordingly).

My partner and I will always be courting each other. There is always freshness. Because we do not demand to be joined at the hip. We are separate and we are together by choice - a choice made daily and accepting the sometimes large areas of difference.

A Word to Husbands:

To keep your marriage brimming,
With love in the loving cup,
Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
Whenever you're right, shut up.

(Ogden Nash).

I have known a few women. I've known those who wanted a father figure, & those who wanted a father/provider for the kids they wanted to have.

I have known those who really only wanted someone to love, & those who only wanted to be loved. I've also known some who loved nothing but themselves, & only wanted to be admired. They're the ones who make plastic surgeons rich.

However a woman, once she is a mother, is a mother, first, middle & last. Any man who expects anything else is in for disappointment. She may criticise them occasionally, but don't you dare agree with her on that, or you'll be the worst in the world.

Foxy, my mother told me that a really good marriage/relationship was one where two people spent their entire time trying to make the other happy. I think perhaps she & dad achieved this, late in their lives, but they had hit a lot of rocks getting there.

I have not seen it elsewhere, & I'm afraid I don't expect to.

It has taken me over 50 years to even start to understand anything of women. Pity it took so long that I am now such a crotchety old bugger, I can't take much advantage of it

Dear Hassie,

To me you Hassie are not an old crotchety
man. From the time that we've shared cyberspace
I've found you to be a very decent, caring, human
being, who loves his family very, very, much and who
has a great deal of wisdom to pass on to the rest of
us. We may not always agree - but your opinions always
gives me food for thought.

As far as marriages are concerned. Of course happiness
in marriage is not something that just happens and good
marriages must be created. As the Reading I cited
earlier stated ( read at my niece's wedding).
It's about establishing a relationship
in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual
and the obligation is reciprocal. It's not only marrying
the right partner, it is being the right partner.
My husband and I have had our ups and downs (who hasn't?),
but we've come out of it - stronger as a result.

One of my favourite quotes comes from Mark Twain who wrote:

"I cannot promise you a life of sunshine;
I cannot promise riches, wealth or gold;
I cannot promise you an easy pathway
That leads away from change or growing old.

But I can promise all my heart's devotion
A smile to chase away your tears of sorrow;
A love that's ever true and ever growing;
A hand to hold in yours through each tomorrow."

I don't know how I would have coped without my husband's
love and support when I was diagnosed with cancer a few
years ago. The fact that he stood by me through it all
made the world of difference. And just the fact that I wasn't
alone made a world of difference.

Women don't know what they want.

One thing for certain though is that any who believe that the world spins around them will be controlling and dependent, and that affects the development of children as well as making life miserable for their partners.

Men do themselves and their prospective children no favours by getting into bed with women who need to be babied or treated with kid gloves. Of course there are equally obnoxious men, but this thread concerns women. The whole idea of having to stay on the 'right' side of the fiery little Aussie battleaxe indoors (a carbon copy of her US model seen in soaps, mags and on idiotic daytime talk shows) is the pits and rewards negative behaviour. Just leave and learn. Or better, give the big swerve first off.

One of the unexpected negative consequences of social change wrought by feminists, and particularly those who infest the self-titled 'Progressives' is the phenomenal growth in the number of single women. Feminists have taken the easy way out, explaining the large rump of single women as being the preference of women (including the lesbian option), but more the fault of men whom they say cannot accept changed 'gender' roles and lack 'commitment'. Strange rationalisations from feminists and 'Progressives' who would prefer to trash marriage anyhow - except for 'gay' marriage, which apparently is ideal (don't mention the lesbians!).