Looks like we’re all on the same page as far as telling a lie being appropriate in some circumstance to protect children. Good point about when to stop R0bert and hello there.

I suppose that comes with what lie you have told and what has happened and can the children cope with the truth yet. I think working away from home and being very busy is easier to cope with than imagining your dad in jail for touching you. My husband often went overseas for 6 months at a time to work for real.

“"One of the children thought he was dead, and another was trying to get lemons to make lemonade to pay to get her father back from the police," she said. "I don't think I can ever trust the police again”
"It's made them [the children] want to be with him more than ever because they don't know what will happen next."

The above makes me think everyone was a little too honest.

I’ve heard of mums and dads being amazing when DoCS come calling to remove children and they tell kids how great it is that they are going to go on a little holiday and pack their stuff – that kind of fortitude in what would be a terrifying moment for most parents is very cool.

It would be nice to know a little more about the case, witnesses that complained but didn’t step in and halt any behaviour they reported later? Police only interviewing witnesses that agreed something indecent had happened?

And yet: “Detective Sergeant Craig Johnston, of Nelson, who did the review, said in his report in July last year that he believed the father had been correctly charged.”

Surprising given the information in the article.

And ugh Banjo – hope they removed that baby on the spot.

hi piper..i read the link ..and im one of those who feel suss on these things..as a parent..who was molesterd..i was never able to get close to my own kids....thus look with susspition at those who over do the cuddly wuddly thing..too..

you got to be able to think..like those who have been hurt by this fondling of kids..[the kid poking her finger into his shirt indicates this he has done to his[and no doudt other kids..some mug tried to bribe my youngest with lollies for a kiss..right in fron of me..once[that for me was a step too far

they were in a camping area..with other kids
he no doudt would poke his fingers into any little hole..to get hgis thrills

i feel he got off on a teqnicality
if you go doing stuff in public..the public has a right to complain[and that is all the right police need..you know how i hate docs..but thats another issue.

but mate i gotta tell you
some bloke pokes a hole in my kids clothing..i rip his head off[its bad enough doing it to his own..IN PUBLIC*..let alone in front of my kids..[thats called desensitisation or grooming..the kids think my dad dont love me cause he dont try to poke his diget into my holes.

i write to allow you to vent back mate.
finger pointing and all that prevented me..but i know you need to talk.

please find reason to continue
[i dont lie to my kids..even re santa/easter..and al that other huggie stuff..some never got it..or had too much of it..but if blokes can poke their digets in holes..thats grooming..ok not enough proof..but a sign.

Hey OUG, I missed you.

I had a wee looksee for this article showing up anywhere else on the net and only found about 6 responses anywhere else which all came from menfolks with comments about how men always get falsely accused because they have penises. Yawn I thought... same old same old. Indignation abounds as they zero in on what they thought they read.

So it’s interesting OUG that you spotted that it does seem to appear certainly a little unclear to me why the case was dismissed. Really my only focus was the children coping with what was going on around them and how would most of us protect our children in the same circumstances.

A kid poking her finger into a hole in the fathers shirt sounds like a spontaneous thing a playful kid does to me. I'm not sure why it's even mentioned.

I would lie or withhold information from children, because suggestion is a bad bad thing and children’s imaginations are almost as bad as adult imaginations. So unless they have the ability to understand what their dad is accused of then I wouldn’t be feeding them any information about any part of it.

Other bits of the story make me curious; these accusing people watched but did not act in the moment. Why did the police wait three months. Were the children interviewed or checked by a doctor. Why would the adults be happy to be identified along with their children if “legal reasons” weren’t holding them back.

Thank goodness for legal reasons I reckon.

OUG and to some extent the focus of this thread highlight a couple of major problems. OUG willing to regard the man as guilty based on OUGs own issues rather than on any understanding of playfull interacting with kids. The thread because of the apparent utter lack of concern for what the father has gone through and will probably continue to go through for the rest of his life. Hes treated as disposable, the only concern is for the kid and stuff what happened to him as an adult.

Why should the lives and wellbeing of children be treated as more important to society than the lives and well being of the adults they grow up to to be? Parents may choose to sacrifice their lives for their kids but as a society we can do great injustice when we start treating one group as somehow more worthy of decent treatment than others.

The power difference between government and most individuals is far greater than between adult and child so that's not a legitimate reason for dismissing the way adults are treated at times.

So men do raise the issue when opportunity arises, all to often met with the rsponse that whatbhappens to them is a yawn. Its hardly surprising that while men are treated as disposable that some will reach a point wher they treat others in the same way.

The horror faced by an innocent man accused of being a child abuser, being kept from his family and kids on the basis of a claim by strangers and still stuck with supervised time with his kids is not a yawn, its not trivial.

R0bert

i am really without hope in these things
yep a no hoper..in the main because ignorance is so easy to claim.
govts lie..prime[lol]minesters lie..lawyers lie science lies media lies..so why lie..cause 'everyone is doing it'.

well tell me its fine to go poking holes in clothing
and lets play on a level field...but we dont got a level field.

as to why the police took 3 months..isnt my issue..nor why the observers didnt say anything[but lets go the 2 de option]..cause users easy turn to abusers..thats why.

ask more who is getting the benifit..[those in the know..or with clever lawyers..or rather who complains first..who gets their foot in the door....first.

the first invaders claimed the best spots..[in say briton
they lord the roost..you want to work the masters land..he takes his share of the top..[like your grandkids wont be able to go to the gem fields and mine the wealth..or soon even fish..cause they got no voice.

as a smoker i got my big new tax instantly
collecting so far billions more than the big miners will pay[ever]..my father died of asbestosis from smoking the asbestos filters in his fags..but we were too ignorant to sue anyone.

i hear much of abuseive priests..but heck they got colluded deciete on their side..and there must be little dispute that liers with lawyers..do as they will

[see the bbc child pervert idiot..molestering at will anywhere they wish...why?..the second they get accused they attack right back with scummy lawyers!

the link validates ya need someone to speak for you
those having no one..well stuff em.

i been declared a criminal cause of my own ignorance
pray lord this living nightmare ends sooner rather than later..the power lies with the people is a huge lie..cause power is to subvert power to special people..who can murder rape pillage steal whatever they will.

the bbc this morning explained how powerless the obomination is with sandy..yet can kill unseen from the skies..and no one complains[who matters..so we live with drones in the skies..rapists in the places our kids congregate..who need docs..to get at our kids.

till you felt that knife blade shear through your soul
seen you got no power..you just cant know..regardless of who tells you no.

i hate lies
detest liars..users/abusers
no mater who they are..or where they do it...blatently..
upon anyone who..'lets them'..or aint strong enough to stop them...