Retchub, we are approaching this whole thing in a strange way if an assumption of “woman is the bad one” is clung to so tightly.

She gets the baby bonus because she had the baby, if in a couple they probably share or make joint decisions about where the money goes, adoptive parents also receive the bonus. Mother dies in child birth then dad gets it.

So after the bonus the mother then gets a benefit so that she has a hand raising a child that will one day become part of this society. She gets it so we don’t have to have beggars on the street and children suffering.

We have children segregated in to the haves and have nots because this is a capitalist society isn’t it?

Maybe it is made harder for a man to move on because financially he is contributing to his child and on the other side a women with a child is also held back a little more because of that shared history.

Now your “many young women today have children as a result of being lured to the cash” well of course, if we’re talking stupid young people then stupid young people will always act stupid and young.

Hey Fractelle, the situation at my house is like a mixture of this thread and the Jacky O one and the Suffer little Children one strangely enough. I have to parent someone while in turn teaching them to parent. There is far too much money in benefits and potential for harm that on my property I could potentially be responsible for. The solution is put up with it or they leave but others will try and address some of the problems. The meeting turned in to them saying they felt I was angry at them.

Maybe, mostly I need them to listen to me. I believe I can fix a lot but my methods do not fit with their plans and expectations. My experience of life and parenting do not outweigh their experience with casework and unpersonlised (is that a word?) expectations

Piper

<< mostly I need them to listen to me. I believe I can fix a lot but my methods do not fit with their plans and expectations. My experience of life and parenting do not outweigh their experience with casework and 'depersonalised' .. expectations >>

You have expressed the situation very well. My experience with the bureaucracy occurred when I had to make a claim for a workplace injury. The tactics were the same: the B's (bureaucrats) relied on their policies and guidelines, if your situation didn't fit with policy-A, subsection-B; they lack independence of thought, imagination and resources. All these same qualities are required to care for children; so you are in completely different worlds from the get-go. Ironically, they interpret your anger at the stupidity and inflexibility of the system as a personal attack. While they take refuge in their policies, they take your justifiable emotion as personal.

The problem is to convince, that your complaint is with the limitations of the system; not them as individuals. To do this requires suppressing your emotions AND setting out facts in a straightforward manner. And then it doesn't always work.

Add to this mix parents who aren't all that caring and evade responsibility, people who believe that single mothers are making a fortune out of the system, B's with a power complex... and you, stuck in the middle.

What is the solution? Part of the problem is the way B's work performance is assessed; it is all about stats, what looks good on paper. You can't list hugs and the emergence of trust from the children in your care on paper. The outcomes B's are expected to achieve have no relationship to the messy lives of human-beings.

I am trying not to mention Kafka here, damn it now I have. But his writings are horribly and profoundly true of bureaucracy and its evil twin totalitarianism; this is not unique to government, it applies to any large organisation (private or public).

Sorry I don't mean to be so depressing, the only thing that worked for me was sheer persistence.

It is a strange thing, I know this department actually has a lot of flexibility. They could listen to me and try it my way but they are looking too far in to the future and the goals they have set. We wont get there successfully because it does depend on personality and the personality I am dealing with needs many responsibilities removed for now. A child that has no parents and has not been parented cannot be expected to parent.

Ignoring this leaves another child at risk of harm and a lot of confusion about who it is I am caring for.

It is one of those things where I can wait and go “told you so” but by then far too much damage will be done. Witnessing it for years will probably take its own toll on our household.

I haven’t heard of kafka.

But persistence might be all I am left with.[smile]

Were you successful with your problem?

Piper

<< It is one of those things where I can wait and go “told you so” but by then far too much damage will be done. Witnessing it for years will probably take its own toll on our household. >>

I understand.

As for me, I got 6 months lump-sum payout. I suffer from anxiety, depression and Myalgic Encephalomyelitis - I refuse to call it by its common name of Chronic Fatigue because that is like calling a migraine a headache.

I do temp administrative work (which bores me completely) and when I can get it; acting work - despite the ME, acting is the one thing I seem to get energy from - even if a 24 hour shoot requires a week in bed afterwards - I don't care, I am doing something I love. If only I could make a living from it.

Franz Kafka was a novelist noted for the dystopian theme of his books. He was commenting on totalitarianism, either from extreme left politics (communism) or extreme right (fascism). He is brilliant but depressing reading. But the really good thing about his writing is that you know other people are as completely gobsmacked by petty authority as you and I.

Piper

Life is Irony

http://www.renderosity.com/mod/gallery/media/folder_193/file_1926709.jpg

My relations with beaurocracy are very friendly!
1. I reported some of them to federal or state Ombudsmen.
2. One time I desagreed with an an Ombudsman on phone and I asked them to give me in writing what they said me on phone. they did!
3. An other time I asked beaurocrats to give me in writing what they said me or I will ignore them, because their rules was discriminating against parents, they did not give me and I ignored them! ready to meet them in the court!
4. One time a beaurocrat tried to find me after work and convince me not to report him to Ombudsman, without succes.
5. I took to court a federal agancy and of cause I won.
6. An other time I wrote to Ombudsman not because I wanted to report beaurocrats but to inform them that I will not accept any kind of discrimination as happened in the past and I received my new pasport within 2-3 days!

When we claim our rights we discourage beaurocrats to ignore and violate people's rights.
TPP you should be carefull because you depend on them professionaly and you are not citizen or permanent resident, at least try to become permanent resident.
Antonios Symeonakis
Adelaide