None of this was to bad for me at all, I was just a kid and didn't see the ugliness like the bloodied clothes in the creek etc.

Can we tell much by looks?

This question could just as easily be:

Can we tell much by race?

Not a lot. People can be plain but charming. Attractive with all the personality of a lump of clay. And every other combination in between.

Have I been taken in by good looks - absolutely, when much much younger I thought that as I was attractive so should be my partners. Like I said, I was young, and also destined to learn the hard way.

Now I look past appearance to the real person. I have become very astute at detecting the superficial, the puerile, the bully, the mean and petty. As a result I have no time for such people any more - life is too short.

Therefore, Poly/Boaz my answer is no, we cannot judge by appearance alone.

Poly,

There are several factors to looks, wherein in-kind there several perceptions. I recall this one from an old Psych book;

The way a man percieves a woman, the way a man pereieves a woman,the way a woman percieves a man,the way a woman percieves a woman, the way a person perceives his/her self, and the way way the camera images the person.

Thus, what is "much" is perceived differently.

I guess, I would infer good health (sometimes incorrectly) to go hand-in-hand with good looks, but not personality or intelligence. With some pronounced physical defects, I may initially be concerned the person could face a mental challange, but make no pre-judgements on personality or worth

Thanx Foxy for those kind words...and a joyful happy Christmas to you, Meredith, Fraccy, Pericles and all... also. ( can't mention all names.. but ur all in the mind)

Oly..and Fractelle.. I think we can probably tell more about what kind of mood a person is in by 'looks' (facial expressions) but not so much the inner character.

At times the 'facade' gives way to the darker side coming through and this is what we see in predatious animals when they have their sights set on their prey.

Another aspect to 'looks' seems from my observation to be that we tend to have 'types' that we gravitate to more than others.
Some blokes find some girls exceedingly attractive whereas others find the same girls not so. (Same with girls re blokes)

I tend to think that it's more behavior which tells the inner story. This is why I feel it is important to see how people act in different contexts.. social..work.. stress etc.

Poly/Boaz

Its not so much what you say, even less how you look, but what you do that counts.

A good thought to take into the new year.

"”An idea that is developed and put into action is more important than an idea that exists only as an idea.” - Buddha

The best of the season to all.

Yep, I second that...

You have a good Chrissy, Boaz!

It's a hard question isn't it, if or not to charge that guy. You worry about hurting his family, you maybe saving them, you don't know.

I'd tend to lean toward laying charges, or if not criminal charges, doing something to remedy it somehow... not just solely cuz I am paranoid he might be beating up his family... more so cuz he DID beat up you and that's very wrong of him.

Anyway... it's good you got it off your chest, even just here...

Hope Santa brings you lots of yummers :)