PALE” No All I am saying is John is a very successful high flyer biz corp director that has provided well.”

Using particular, anecdotal examples , which are not universally observable, does not make for good law.

Law should be written based on what is best for all. That means both parents and any children.

Children as best served by having an ongoing relationship with both parents.

Parents are best served if they are both treated as equals and not one as subordinate to the other, as used to be the case when women were considered incapable of handling finance and their estates automatically became the property of their husbands.

Regarding “to be fair to the kids hes not much for organising children”

I will take credit for being better organized but it is largely irrelevant.

Children need more than simple organizing. If it were a matter of organizing children, Lenin’s experiments in collective parenting would have not been such an unmitigated disaster.

Children need the unconditional love which I have observed, with very few exceptions, only comes from a natural parent.

My daughters dealt with the failure of their parents marriage pretty well, largely because my ex and I both maintained a sense of unconditional love for them.

They are both adult young ladies now but if I ask then the question “how many times do I love you?”

they answer

“Once, from the moment of my birth, ongoing and unconditionally, forever.”

That is the bedrock of faith in parental love which everyone needs to develop into complete adults, free of emotional impairment.

A child will overcome disorganised parents far more easily and readily than they will overcome being denied or deprived of Love.

as much as I repeat we all like john How Stupid do you think kids are?
Dont you think they know Dads real angry because hes had to dump his high profile job to stop mum getting the loins share of the settlement.

They know. They are now learning their worth is property settlement.

As I said hes doing far more harm than good to these four little children that used to be happy and balanced and normal. Now they are playing one against the other( parent) and turning into not so nice little spolied brats.

John Will never be organised and this has been going on a long time now not just a few weeks.

I honestly think kids should stick to what they were doing as much as possible before the break up.
Their routine should not change - or only change weekends but their schol should be from the house they always left from and came home to.
Weekends- sure go stay with mum if they are living with dad - or dad if they are living with mum
imop thats the very best you can do for kids of broken marraiges.
talk to the other parents on the phone at least twice through the week telling them they wont carry messages between parents or get involved in mum and dads arguments.
Some kids on the other hand are lucky to have a mum that further educates themselves for the good of their family.
btw centerlink grants are available for men as well as women to avance ones knowledge.
Anyway its not my problem but I just thought I would share with you all the other side of 50 50 share.
It really very often IS about money (sad )

PALE: "btw centerlink grants are available for men as well as women to avance ones knowledge."

I bow before your undoubtedly excellent personal knowledge of Centrelink benefits. However, as an employed or self-employed person, I have no way of affording to attend uni full-time, yet as a "supporting parent", my ex was entitled to leave the job she had, take up "the pension" and receive additional funding for full-time education. I was expected to pay more CS because of that decision (you'll note it was HER decision,not mine), thus rendering me even less capable of attending uni myself. She was even given funding for her Family Court efforts to prevent me from having equally-shared custody whilst I was forced to represent myself as I had insufficient funds to pay for lawyers. Fortunately, despite the best efforts of "the Women's Legal Aid Service", I still made my case. Perhaps I should be grateful they weren't very competent.

Whilst I don't claim that all women do this to their former spouse, it is all too easy for those who wish to do so.

I deal extensively with ALL Child Matters in my book, please read it and weep at the truth

here is index to chapter 5

http://www.ablokesguide.com

5. Child Matters ................................................................. 100
5.1. Do you want that with fries?..................................... 100
5.2. But my lawyer said ... ............................................. 101
5.3. Finger up Bum Driver Reviver................................... 103
5.4. 2007 update .......................................................... 104
5.5. The legislation........................................................ 122
5.6. Reconciliation Reviver ............................................. 125
5.7. The Case of Larry ................................................... 130
5.8. More New Bits........................................................ 133
5.9. Pedophiles [incl MBP] and Family Law ........................ 134
5.10. Where is Normal Order? .......................................... 137
5.11. He has forgotten KISS............................................. 144
5.12. Contempt and Contravention.................................... 148
5.13. You call THAT an order, HERE is an order ................... 152
5.14. Further proof ......................................................... 159
5.15. The Great Howard vs Parkinson Vomit Bikeoff ............. 160
5.16. Signing off............................................................. 165

PALEIF “They know. They are now learning their worth is property settlement.”

If ever there was a two edged sword, it is that one.

“I honestly think kids should stick to what they were doing as much as possible before the break up.
Their routine should not change - or only change weekends but their school should be from the house they always left from and came home to.”

Whilst that is idealistic and we do not live in an idealistic world I would observe the following

1 my daughters did not need to chance school, thus idealistic your expectation is quite possible.

2 A child’s routine will evolve naturally as the progress upward in age. Evolve essentially means change

At different ages

Changes to school syllabus
Changes to shoe size
Changes in clothing
Changes to routine as they take up or drop different extra-curricula pursuits.

I do believe you are making an emotional argument, rather than a rational one and my observation is, undue attention to emotions do not make for the best laws or best outcomes.

I just thought as I said I would comment on the down side of dragging kids between two homes on school days.
I have seen three of my friends do it and its much worse than seeing Mummy or daddy weekends on the little kids.
The arguments and fights and struggles contiune on a daily basis.
Both the past two posters have provided also further evidence it is about money.
Even our friends Johns change waw with property settlement in mind despite the fact of corse he loves his kids. He adores them.
Also Anti if your got help with uni its must have been because she was on some type of single parent payment. Which would again indicate you had to be hauled into court to be made reasonsible for these kids.
pretty sad.
Hey Col People get pretty emoitional about kids they tell me- Usually their own
Whatever happend to love thy neighbour as you love your own
The trouble kids have today more than anything is totally self serving parents. They dont learn anything but fighting and whos going to buy the best birthday pressi Mummy Or Daddy.

Its not the kids fault the way they are raised but give me the old days anytime