Anomie,
I think you are making up more stories. Male maligners routinely disguise their maligning as humour, but it is noticed that you have not made negative references about the female body. How cowardly.

Perhaps you should just stick with the subject of porn

Timkins, lighten up buddy. I don't think Anomie was attacking anybody and your attack is unlikely to win anybody to your viewpoint.

Human sexuality is such a confused mess at times that having a friendly laugh is probably one of the best things we can do. It's not just teenage boys who get erections at inappropriate times but personally I'd rather deal with that side of the coin than live with the turmoil of body image that so many females seem to have to deal with.

Hopefully Anomie with a sense of humor and a recognition of human nature will be able to help her son through a potentially rough time without adding guilt to the mix.

Cheers
R0bert

Robert,
I would think that porn has become more common, to such an extent that sex in the media has become gratuitous. Each movie now has to have a gratuitous sex scene and a gratuitous car chase scene. Most movies have a gratuitous sex scene half way through, and a gratuitous car chase scene at the end, although this can be reversed, and some movies have gratuitous sex throughout, or gratuitous car chase scenes throughout.

Having gratuitous sex throughout probably constitutes porn, but gratuitous car chase scenes could also be construed as a type of porn. The emphasis would be on gratuitous, and what sells in the market place.

However a more important issue for many males is the fact that they are now guilty until proven innocent, and allegations of sexual misconduct can be made, and it is up to the male to prove those allegations are incorrect.

There are basically no male kindergarten teachers anymore, and many male teachers have left the primary school system, or will not join, because just one allegation of sexual misconduct can ruin them for life. The allegation need not be proven, just made.

I personally know of one man who went to jail for 5 years for sexual assault (or rape), when there was no physical evidence provided. Just her word against his.

I also made a formal complaint about an author in a newspaper, who had written about a personal issue with her 10 yr old son, and her son’s identity was also made known to the public (which is outside of codes of conduct for the APC). However that complaint was dismissed, as the author said the piece was humorous, but if a male had written similar about his daughter, he would be thrown in jail, or thrown out of journalism at least.

Apparently females think about sex and view porn just as much as males. But a male is now guilty until proven innocent, while females are always innocent. So unfortunately, even “humour” about boy’s sexuality can very much harm boys in the current environment

So now I know why my thigh high, nun shined, leather boots were only effective on double decker London buses with a conductor! Dammit! I always thought it was me! Timkins, we all know that boys are susceptible to their turgid, raging hormones at the ripe old age of 13 of thinking unspeakable things, as we mess through the fug of adolescence (girls don't weather so well either). Most of us remember what it was like (I still cringe). But as adults, we can only help them through it. It worries me that porn is so rampant. Getting back to the issue, I think it does have its place, but it doesn't have to be disrespectful, it depends on how the individual looks at it and how they've been brought up to see sex. It's a bit like fast food, don't make a regular diet out of it. Sexuality is supposed to be a healthy part of a human being, if it's degraded or degrading or twisted, then porn buys into that personality. Then we should look at the reasons why porn becomes so twisted to an individual. It can be scary stuff, but there's porn and there's porn. I don't believe in a blanket ban. Or a safari suit for that matter.

Recent posts in this thread remind me of the unfortunate phenomenon to which anomie refers - only in my case single-deckers were equally sources of rampant priapism. I used to travel an hour to and from high school by bus, and many times I had to navigate the aisle with school bag held firmly to the front, or with my shirt 'casually' untucked. Curiously, these rather 'uplifting' experiences were rarely associated with any overtly erotic thoughts, let alone images (I used to try - vainly - to think of anything *but* matters sexual). Mind you, I used to occasionally be somewhat titillated by rare glimpses of the frilly bloomers that private school girls wore back then...

Despite the apparent disbelief of some, I think this is quite a normal (if embarrassing) experience for adolescent boys. My 14 year-old son confirms this and says it's still a source of discomfort and amusement among his mates.

Mind you, a huge difference is that he and I can talk about it. When I was his age there is no way I would have discussed unwanted erections with my old man - or pornography for that matter. Given the advent of the Internet and video, we've had conversations about pornography since he was about 10.

Interestingly, like me, his biggest problem with porn is that it is mostly incredibly boring.

Garra, i think it's a bit of a win that you can discuss the perils of embarrassing adolescence with your son and come to the conclusion together about porn. Which makes me think that most people can grow up with the sex thing happening in a healthy manner which takes the power out of porn - that we are not slaves to it. A healthy attitude and the ability to be able to discuss it without all the stealth and guilt does take the teeth out of it and let young people see it much more realistically. No matter how embarrasing your son finds growing up, isn't it great that he can discuss it with you? And then learn that it's not him, it's just growing up. He sounds like he's going to be quite the well adjusted young man with your influence. Now, how's he going musically hmmm.? Introduced him to Leonard Cohen yet?