LP its not too much to ask. There may be a host of reasons why a person is not suitable, or does not wish to have children. One them might be that there are moments when u feel so frustrated with them that u say "Sometimes I feel that if u were not my flesh and blood, I'd disown you" !!! which happened to me today.I did the saying.
But letting off steam with words we regret later (and which we apologise for) goes with the territory of family.
But when you have been placed in touch with the mystery of life, and sit back and look at the big piccy, the idea of bringing new life into the world is most precious. Words cannot describe it.
I just hope, that you would reflect on your thoughts and ensure that it is not just for selfish reasons that you would not wish to have a family and children.
Females are not 'defined' in terms of social contribution, by their ability to have children, but there is no one else who can have em :)
It's all about what we are "together" as male and female.

Ah Boaz,
I noticed the use of the term, “male and female”. This may be coincidental, but I was reading an article on parenting in The Age today, where it actually mentioned fathers as well as mothers, but more incredibly, it mentioned “men and women” a number of times.

I cannot remember the last time I have read that in the press. There are normally plenty of “I’s” or “as a woman” or “women and children” etc, but rarely “men and women”. May be a small start. Who knows?

I agree with LPs comments.

It is terrible how soiety makes people who don't want children feel somehow inferior for the lack of children. I think it is great that people who chose to have children get to experience the joy of it and I would not begrudge them that. I don't think that my friends encourage me to have children to "validate" their decisions, but more if you have something really great you want to share it. That is a nice thing.

But I get very annoyed with people treating me like I'm insane for not wanting them. My husband also doesn't want them (which is quite convenient for us) so this point of view is obviously not restricted to either men or women, and we both get as much stick as the other from collegues, relatives and friends. We both like children well enough (we have five god children who we spend a fair bit of time with) but we just don't lead a lifestyle that would enable us to give the proper attention and support to a dependant person for the next 20-odd years, and we don't intend to change our lifestyle.

What worries me is couples who reach 34 or so and think they are running out of time and start having kids just in case they miss out, who they then resent. (I know one couple who have done this and surely it is better that they wait longer and risk none, or don't have them at all?)

It seems unfortunate that there are loads of people desperate to have kids who can't, and that makes them unhappy, but I can't change that, so putting pressure on me to have them is unproductive. I don't want kids because I am selfish, but better only I suffer for my selfishness, rather than some poor kid...

JCL
glad ur comfortable with that decision. Childless couples can make a great contribution to society.
Hope u have taken a 'whole of life' look at that. If u have a good extended family network then u can survive ok. But unless one is pretty strong and able to predict how one will feel as a widow or widower at 65 with no offspring, its quite a big decision I feel.
Just to be sure, might be an idea to talk with some people in that situation. If u still feel no drama then you should be ok.

JCJ,
I hope you don’t mind me asking, but why is it that you do not wish to ever have children. It appears to me that society is going around in circles at times.

On one side we have the IVF industry, where even 67 yr old women can now become pregnant, while on the other side we have an enormous abortion industry.

Then we have government funding courses in “male hate” and the “destruction of the nuclear family” (and one proponent of this received a standing ovation at a WA university last year), while on the other side we have the “family benefits tax”.

The whole thing is not just a moral issue, as there are very big sums of money involved. If you don’t want children, then I don’t care, as long as you do not try and blame men or patriarchy etc, etc, etc, but I am trying to find out why people do not choose to have children.

TIM
can u give me more details on that WA lecture and standing ovation.. who was the speaker .. is there a transcript etc ?