Well if families looked after their children better and when they get on their feet in young adult years, maybe it would be different.

I come from a family with money to get anything. Their rejection of me, due to my circumstances, and my inability due to discrimination to get decent ongoing employment..............led me in one direction.

To the perilous nocturnal underworld of Sydney.

I'll see you all driving through William St in your luxury cars looking at us like we're just some common trash. But we're human beings. And but for circumstance, we could be someone else. We're someone's kids too.

X Merchants kid,
There is a better life than what you are involved in. Your present relationships are not true love but more of the same abuse you feel you deserve. Recognise there is one who can truly love you despite your feeling of self failure. God appointed a better life for you quit the self victimisation and seek the potential of the best purpose God designed for you. Recognition of God can release the potential he has for you, rather than end up lost and dead in the gutter. Visit Wesley Central Mission in Castlereagh St Sydney.

X Merchant's Kid

I was really saddened by your post. I do not pass judgement. I have nursed mental health clients in similar lifestyles. Did you have a drug habit before you began your other life, or have you developed one since?

I wish you well.

There used to be an excellent group of GPs in Surrey Hills who specialised in helping people with gender differences. They are probably still there.

Cheers
Kay

I've been in and out of there for years. Each time I've come back I stay longer. I live in a public housing apartment in a secret location near the city. As to drugs, I'm reluctant to get into great detail, but will say I've done more since I went into it than before I did. The whole thing's a big part of my life. How would I go outside? Been there before many times, its no good. When I've had legal problems, its nigh on impossible to get fair treatment, they just look at you and well, you know. "justice is blind" ...ha!

Like the time I lost my ticket and ended up with the police for six hours, and was stripped and searched they think I had drugs concealed even in my anal cavity (a common occurence)--anyway I had nothing on me--a new strategy of users to avoid prosecution is to have it straight away or [rarely] carry it in the mouth and swallow it to avoid detection if picked up.. I'd done nothing wrong that day. I'm sure if I lived at Waverton or Lindfield, had a suit and was picked up at 830 am with lost ticket it would be a different story.

The punters, to which I will informally refer to the men as, come from a wide range of socio-economic profile and occupation. Including international visitors, commercial travelers, local professionals, businessmen, skilled, semi-skilled and unskilled worker. The length of meetings ranges from 5/10 minutes to a number of hours with the most typical being 20 minutes to an hour, either in a hired room in a "safe house", the punter's motor vehicle, the punter's room if staying in recognized city hotels, the punter's residence in some cases [for me once a house near Sirius Cove in Mosman and another in a waterfront 3-room luxury pyrmont apartment] or possibly the girl's home.

The income is at times high but also unpredictable.

What about the morality of families who abandon psychologically and/or toss out young adult children for moral type reasons? Is my father a proper man if he's unconcerned about my direction? He is to his lifting equipment and materials handling business clients who meet him when he arrives in a luxury Eurpoean car, eat in dress circle restaurants paid for on the gold Amex etc. He is to the Qantas club ["so I don't get stuck with the cattle"], the porters at the Crown casino tower in melbourne who take his bags up to his suite. And to the locals of the Norwood Payneham Stepney council in Adelaide.

Inner

I detect your loneliness. So sad.

I guess you would like to punch your father's "lights out"? Maybe you should - metaphorically!

Why can't you get out of this whirlwind of apparent trash? You seem to be a very good person. A sad person. A person in pain.

Why can't you change your identity and move out from where you live?

Pardon my naivety.

Thinking of you.

Kay