Hi,

I wanted to get everyone's take on discipline. Especially spanking. Do you believe it is helpful?

In certain circumstances I think it is reasonable to smack your kids.
That said, NEVER EVER use smacking as the default go-to punishment.

Make then do push-ups instead, everytime.
There's a reason for this, and it's not for them it's for you.
It's so that when they drive you to the point of losing your temper, you don't treat them unfairly when you're enraged.

"Drop and give me 10"

Push-ups isn't the real punishment though it's just the initial one.
The purpose of the push-ups is to give you a few seconds to calm down and think clearly, at which point you can dish out a far more creative punishment to really screw with them.

So you stand there grinning, watching their little arms strain while they pump them out, digruntedly.

That way they don't get the best of you when you lose you temper and you can better manage the situation without treating them unfairly.
They will know it's a lot harder to wind you up, and doing so will backfire on them.
And also, exercise is good for them, much better than smacking.

Try to build a relationship with them, so that you understand their issues and point of view.
Kids aren't always skilled enough to articulate what's wrong as they have limited vocabulary, so you might have to talk to them and read between the lines.

Try not to smack them unless you really, really have to.
-But don't let them think they're aren't boundaries and consequences of their actions.

If you do smack your kids and use smacking as a go-to punishment there are big risks.
At some point, your kid will think that they get punished no matter what they do and will stop caring.
And you will have dug yourself into a hole where all you'll know what to do is to keep smacking them because they don't listen or respect you anymore.

Your kid will start to hate you for it, and become really badly dysfunctional as they become young adults.
- And they will harm others; just as you harmed them.

Jaredpayton welcome much as Armchair critic said but you in my view have every right to reserve the right, under the right circumstances to go right ahead
Us older people got hit nearly every day
Did not hurt but knew it was over done sometimes
Not a fan of PC, minorities with minority views trying to force us to agree

I was waiting for a ferry on one of the Morton Bay islands one day, about 35 years ago. A family of 4 or 5 were on the beach beside the jetty. A baby in one of those large bassinet type prams was screaming it's head off, & annoying everyone within about a hundred yards, it had good lungs.

A lady, I presume it's mother, picked up a large stick, about a metre long, & 50mm diameter, & waved it threateningly over the bassinet. The baby immediately stopped screaming. I was amazed, but my next thought was, "that lady must have very obedient children".

I have to ask, if it works, & other threats & systems don't, why would you stop using it. After all the race survived for millennia before Doctor Spock was even thought of.

Just to cover the point. I never had to use any force of any type on my kids. They really did not like daddy being upset with them.

Just a frown was enough to have the oldest cry, & the younger ones stop what ever caused the frown.

Perhaps I was just lucky, or perhaps I did something right, who knows.

People should raise their own children the way they think is best. However, all parents have a duty to themselves and their children to ensure their children are well disciplined, thoughtful and well-rounded before they are released on society. There MUST be effective punishment for bad behaviour in whatever form parents think best. It is not an area for Big Brother and academics.