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The Forum > General Discussion > I miss my dad.

I miss my dad.

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He died 25 years ago, of a heart attack, while mowing. My mum found him dead.

By most standards my dad was a pretty ordinary bloke, who had been far from lucky in his time of birth. Like the rest of his generation, he had the depression destroy his first career, like many others. He was just on his feet, & married mum, his long time girlfriend, an old maid of 26 as judged by the times, when I & the war came along, & off he went. It was another 10 years before he could start to build the house they planned in 39.

I know a lot of stuff. I can ride a horse, sharpen a razor, a carving knife, or an axe. I cam mix cement, pitch a roof, or change a tyre. Yes a tyre, not a wheel. I can do these things because dad taught me. There are so many things you did not know you were learning, when dad taught you.

He died 28 years ago, at 80. I was busy acquiring a granny flat installing it on my property, & moving mum in, so I did not grieve too much.

Mum died 3 years back, just short of 100, & strangely it is dad that I have been missing more & more since.

I'm sorry about this, but it was that damn Christmas tree. Dad would have got that, put it into a drum of sand, & decorated it, with me "helping" of course, & I could not help thinking of him as I did I
t this year.

Yep, just an ordinary bloke, except he was my dad, & I miss him heaps.
Posted by Hasbeen, Monday, 23 December 2013 1:26:48 PM
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yep Christmas does highlight some of our greatest losses. Thanks for sharing your feelings Hasbeen. The older I get the more I appreciate my elderly dad despite his weaknesses. Fatherhood is very much undervalued these days. Great that you have fond memories.
Posted by runner, Monday, 23 December 2013 11:41:20 PM
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We need to give ourselves the permission and time to grieve. How is the problem.

Soon the father hating feminists will seagull in to dump their same old, same old. In advance and in the true spirit of Christmas, not 'happy holidays' or 'happy season' as the Left 'Progressives' would have it, I have a book present for them and as a bonus (free gifts make it don't you think?) the article by the woman author to introduce it,

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/our-fathers-ourselves/200908/the-face-fatherloss

Enjoy.

I wonder how many boys and girls went to bed fatherless today? As the ball-breaking feminists would say, it is all the men's fault, and are they really necessary anyway? But then they would say that wouldn't they?
Posted by onthebeach, Tuesday, 24 December 2013 1:48:32 AM
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Yesterday before Hasbeens thread I was missing my dad.
The thought crossed my mind he was only 54 when his heart killed him.
So I would be very much older than him.
Christmas may have bought him back to my mind but it happens so often.
Always if I take a beer out on the veranda and wish he and mum could be there with me.
Thanks Hasbeen for a good thread
Posted by Belly, Tuesday, 24 December 2013 4:59:43 AM
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Christmas was a time I missed not having parents around when I was a kid. It was never a great time of year for me. I avoided Christmas gatherings until I had my own kids and then it all changed.
I like to think I have become the sort of dad you people talk about. My kids certainly appear to have enjoyed their childhood. I know I enjoyed having them tagging along behind.
We laugh a lot and care a lot and that has to be a good thing.
Fatherhood is a marvelous experience without a doubt.
Take it easy.
SD
Posted by Shaggy Dog, Tuesday, 24 December 2013 6:44:24 AM
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Dear Hasbeen,

My dad died in 1970. He was on his way to work
and fell in the street outside Parramatta
Railway Station. A friend called an ambulance
and dad died in the ambulance. It was a massive
coronary. Dad was 52 years old. He'd had no
history of a heart condition and was fit. But I
guess working in the Good-Year Rubber factory for
many years must have taken its toll on him.

Dad was a gentle soul - and never said a bad word
about anyone. He was very loved not only by our
family, but by his fellow workers, our neighbours,
and our community. This was shown by the huge numbers
who attended his funeral.

I miss him constantly - there's a huge gap that he's
left in my life. I wish that he'd have known his
grandchildren - but it wasn't to be. I wish he'd have
seen me graduate from uni, he'd have been so proud.
And all his lectures on the importance of education
to me would have shown him that I was listening after
all. So yes, Hassie, I can understand you missing your
dad. I miss mine as well. The only thing I can do is
leave my children - the legacy he left me - unconditional
love!

Take care.
Posted by Foxy, Tuesday, 24 December 2013 8:38:07 AM
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