This thread is fictional and dedicated to All Farm Animals.
We invite everybody to contribute in a light hearted manner to come up with ideas and suggestions towards the final trip to ME to be taken By Yabby The little Lamb.

Part one>

The first place I can remember is a long cool paddock under a shady tree with my Mother.
We often stood there and watched the other lambs playing in the sun.
I had problems with my knees right from a nipper which Mum told me was inherited from my father’s side. Mum would have said that.
I was cute for a boy and the other lambs sometimes used to make fun of me so basically I was lonely and spent most of my time close to my mother.
One day a man came to our farm and was looking at my Mother and some of the others in a strange and scary way.
I didn’t sleep much after that and when I did I kept having nightmares about this man called Mark.
It was rumoured he was a big wig from the city apparently one of those Government trade officials and I didn’t trust him one bit.
I heard through some of the others that this Mark "personally" organised ship loads of live sheep direct to Kuwait Governments and other countries.
I learned a lot by watching mum and we had a kind master who at times would bring by special treats. I liked to lay close to mum of a night and when it was hot we would stand by the pond the catch the cool from a big tree. As soon as I was old enough to eat grass my mother used to often leave me to play and come back later through the day.
I made some good friends in those times and often chatted with some of the animals from our ajoining farm.
There was Jessey the Cow and Harriot the chook Milly the Sweet old mare and many more.
One funny friend who became very special to me was Miss Piggy.

Yabby's master stood quietly by the tree and held her breath as she gently squeezed the trigger. The rifles report scattered the sheep, but for one little lamb who seemed confused as to what had just occured. Ironic,thought the master, that when that feral pig grew up to be a Mrs Piggy she and her offspring would be a threat to a lamb that small, and the lamb wouldn't be chasing her then.
The master hoped the pig wasn't diseased, as lone ones often are, because it had been a while since the dogs had had fresh meat. Things were pretty tough financially and the dogs hadn't been getting as many scraps as usual. The master thought about Mark's proposal as she watched the excitement build when the dogs could smell a rare treat. Perhaps, she thought, we could all do with the odd luxury.

But brave little Yabby suddenly leapt to his friends defence and blocked the path to his friend. His little knees were shaking but he stood firm. Some of the others friends had been watching as well when suddenly Wally the Crow Flew in and knocked Yabbys boss Wife off her perch. Right at that time Mr Farmer came along and told his wife to leave the animals mix in their own way like they had for hundreds of years before. He said he was friends with the neighbour of Miss Piggy and he would have none of that high stepping city slicker attitiude on his farm. She ran inside crying threatening one day I will send all those sheep away on the death ships, you will see you will see I will Ring That Mark From the Trade Ministers Office.

The farmer walked over to Yabby and patted him on the head. He said there now little chap dont you worry yourself about that Yabbs shes just all huff and puff and I dont send our farms animals away you know that.

Yabbys rubbed his nose against his farmer boss in thanks.

The farmer sat there talking for a while concerned by the hardness of his new city wife.

All the Animals Looked at the farmer and he said.

Later that Evening everybody gathered around at the upset coming from the farm house.

I shall not want you on my farm again said Mr Farmer to Mrs Farmer - go with you now back to your pretend farmers family and their cruel.
Go Back Go your familys intensive pig farms and tell Amanda dont bother to come her with her ideas again of making more money from locking pigs in tiny cages too small for the animal to even turn around.
I will have none of it.
Off you go! Be away with you women!

Life continued to be pretty good at the farm and all the animals would watch some of the things happening in the area to pass the time.
One thing in particular was men coming and going putting up signs Elders.
There were signs reading Elders Real Estate and Elder banks and even Elders Insurance. Yabby was always interested in what was happening around him and one day asked his mother who these people were.
She didnt answer he young son but walked off with tears in her eyes.
This made him even more curious but not wanting to upset his Mum decided he would ask Miss Piggy next time she dropped by for a chat.

When he didnt see her for a few days he asked old Daniel about his previous job.
Daniel said you run off now yabby and play with the other animals its nothing for you to be worrying your pretty little head over Elders wont be getting this farm- Over my dead body.

Just at that moment Jessey The Cow and dear old milly his favouite Mare came trotting towards Yabby and he was off with a flick of his tail to play in the sun.

They all had a lovely afternoon and Yabby even helped Milly bring in the other cows for the Farmer.
Milly was so smart sometimes she would round up the whole heard for milking without farmer Brown.
Yabby often thought Milly was the bosses favouite. She was such a kind old Mare and smarter than those city blokes with their computers too!

No not me no way I will let this anti farm thread hide behind humor.
Would yabby be alive if humans did not eat meat?
Would the first humans have made it this far without meat on the table?
Is this little sheep sorry that it eats plants and grass alive?
Not for one minute should we forget we have far too many humans who are hungry and far to many who look constantly for reasons to protest about anything.

Yabby returned from the back padock with Milly and his master. Yabby`s master has been talking a lot to other farmers about opening abattoirs just down the road. Yabby asked his master why he would want to do that. He said well Yabby some people dont understand that they just share gods country with other animals like yourself and Milly.
Yabbys asked his farmer why people dont eat more grass and plants like he and his mum.

The farmer sat down on a log and all the other farm animals gathered around. Farmer Brown pulled out his pipe which always caused much excitment amoung the farm animals because that meant he was going to take a rare break and often he shared stories with them.

Old Wally The crow in particular would gather close around because he knew what most other people couldnt understand. That was our master knew crows could count. He would play counting games with Wally and Wally loved it. He often out smarted the master too and he would roar laughing and chuck Wally some extra bread. Yabby always personally felt that Wally liked the smell of the Pipe. Farmer Brown told them some funny stories and they all laughed. Yabby really enjoyed himself. He had good kind farmer . Yabbys Mother loved him very much. When she saw him at the gate, she would trot up to him. He would say. 'Well, old Pet as he would patted and stroked her how is your little Yabby going?. Then he would give us a peice of bread which was very good. All The horses would then come to him but I always felt we were his favouites.

One day Yabby was roaming close to the farmhouse, instead, he could see the farmer speaking with another man - Yabby recognised this other man from one of the nearby farms.

The strange man asked Yabby's master what he should do with his farm and his animals.
Drought was killing many, and many weren't able to live off the land. The farmer was shipping in large quantities of grain, but soon he would be broke, and his family would lose their home.

Yabby's master sighed, and drew out his pipe. He told the man that he needed to do what was best for his family - even if that was building an abbatoir. He told him that ultimately, any real farmer worth his skin knew that the animals were their livelihood, and that trying to keep them all alive was a luxury that only ignorant people in the cities liked to hold on to, all the while buying the cheapest meat they could find, regardless of where it came from.

The abbatoir was complete just 6 months later. Yabby and several other spring lambs were the first to be led into the killing place. He was in a holding pen when a gate opened. Seeing his chance to leave the pen he raced down the narrow runway. The gate closed ominously behind him. Yabby sensed the presence of a human leaning over behind him and the lights went out....

As the bolt from the humane killer pierced Yabby's small brain his life was extinguished. His skin was removed, his body cut up into various pieces by the skilled workers. All that remained of Yabby at the end was numerous shrink wrapped pieces of lamb ready for the table. His other body parts were made into various things like fertiliser and pet meat, nothing was wasted.

As Yabby's master sat down to the first lamb roast produced by the new abbatoir he paused to reflect....mmm this is going to taste good.

The farmer may have banished his wife to the city from whence she came, but it was all too late. She had only pretended to make nice with the poor old farmer. Her true identity? A secret squirrel working under cover for IDIOTS (Institute of Deranged Inciters Of Truth Squashing) She is known in those circles as the pale one …..
What vengeance was she planning against this poor farmer and his neighbours? And what of Yabby and his faithful friends? What will become of them if IDIOTS and city slickers are not forced to see the error of their ways??

Sheesh, if you girls could only now apply that kind of imagination
to your sex lives, it might be fun to know you :)

Yabby awoke from his dream of going to the abattoirs and rushed to his mothers side. When he told her what he had dreamed she said that as he was getting a little older he could join the Free range Farmers Support meeting at the end of the month.
She explained to her son in the normal, soft wise voice that Milly and Jessey the cow and Harriet the cook along with the wise miss Piggy had been with farmer brown to several secret meetings and she felt yabby could now be considered old enough to go along.
Yabby was beside himself with excitment and could harley contain himself from telling the others.
Especially Peggy who he had a crush on. Peggy was a little older than Yabby but he made up for that being a wise little lamb. Miss Piggy came by that day and told yabby she had been invited to see something but didnt know if she should go or not.
Yabby being ever curious cried - Oh What Miss Piggy - Do tell me. Can I come too? Miss Piggy thought for a long while before she answered and looked around to make sure nobody else heard. Then she learned over and whispered in Yabbys ear- meet me here at midnight and thats all I know myself. Yabby wasnt sure how he could do that without telling his mum but not wanting to appear sooky he agreed.

Midnight came and there was Miss Piggy with a stranger. When Yabby went to speak the stranger said Silence! He said if you and Miss Piggy want to help the members of her family and many other farm animals you have a choice. Take the Red pill I have here and come with me. Take the blue pill and stay here.

Yabby wanted to ask his mother and farmer Brown advise first but Miss Piggy wanted to go so he took the red pill with Miss Piggy and that led them Here>
http://www.themeatrix.com/

Part1
Meanwhile at old McGrahams farm.…
The sun is warming the yard ,the last of the mornings fog is s-l-o-w-l-y drifting away . The animals are waking & moving towards the central feed lot.

Cockatoo:
[sitting on a fence post with a Goanna who is swishing his tail from right to left]
‘ Jsus mate! Look at all those interlopers. Used to my place once’

[ He chews at the wood post nonchalantly dropping chips onto the chickens below]

Rooster A :
[seeing a squad of ducks come ashore & more swimming towards the shore]
Look at all the ducks, where did they all come from?
Drake : We’re from the island in the lake –we are refugees –its that bantam rooster, he’s driving us crazy …
[They look across to a small island in a large lake-there a Bantam rooster-now the sole occupant - is proudly strutting about screeching his morning call
Bantam: In-Doo- Nee-Sha! In-Doo-Nee-Sha!
Rooster A – Drake this wont do, ducks & chickens are incompatible & look your ducks are already attacking the chickens & shoving them away from the food!
Drake – You bigot! you specieist! I’m not talking to you anymore.
Rooster B
[ wearing a helmet high on his comb]
– Now A you can’t Generalize –(–he thinks to himself- I’m the General here) not all ducks are the same & I saw some of the chickens pecking the ducks too.
Drake –We are just like you –we are all animals.

G-o-b-b-l-e! G-o-b-b-le !
[ an old red turkey warbles into the yard]
Gosh! What is that?–
That’s old cranky don’t pay him any heed – no one else does …

[ Meanwhile high in the rafters of the chicken shed two bush rats are spying on proceedings & conspiring}
Yin- I tell you we are going to take over this place –seize the means of production.
Yang –But what of the others.
Yin- We’ll ship them out to the battery enclosures- for re-education…

Part2
Screech! –crash! –bash!
Rooster A –What’s that noise?
Hen A The cockatoo is hunting everyone away from the food-he recons he was here first.
Cockatoo – Aah-Ya! Get the hell out of here – let me get at the food!
Duck A – Cockatoo wont let go of my tail-Aah!
RoosterA – Stop that now!
Cockatoo –Don’t patronize me –I am not you little sheep dog!
Hen A – The cockatoo nipped my wing.
Cockatoo Aah shut-up!
Hen B Oy!
Cockatoo Arrh-Take that!
HenB oww!
Ghen c oy!
Cockatoo arrhh!
( it ends in a crescendo of squawks, squeals & feathers….)

Yabby And Miss Piggy returned just in time to see their boss heading for the barn to sort out the latest sqwabble that Horus had told him about.

They didnt go down there but sat down exausted and still very upset by what they had seen after taking the Red Pill.

Miss Piggy Said to Yabby turnrightturnleft was `correct` Yabby.

We have to help Farmer Brown set up these Free Range Pork Farms and Poultry farms and open up abattoirs close by.

Yabby agreed with tears still running down his little face.

For all his youth Yabby looked Old that morning sitting along side the wise Miss Piggy.

Wouldnt it be better Miss piggy For Animals if people had some type of reasonsibilty?

The wise Miss Piggy Replied-

Yabby there are some things we can change and other things we cant.

Some of us before your time have written letters for years to Church Leaders asking them to include Animals in all their goodness but they wont.

RSPCA QLD CEO and that PALE lady even flew from QLD to Melbourne to See that Senator Feilding.

I beleive it took them four years to get a meeting and to this day they has been no reply.

They hide these intensive farms from the good public Yabby so they cant help us.

Forget the church Leaders helping. They wouldnt but you a pork pie. Yabby laughed out loud at that until he rembered those poor pigs he had just seen in cages too small to move and started to weep all over again.

Lets put all our efforts into helping our master open his free range poultry Farms and Pork Farms and build an abatttoir close by said his wise friend.



I dont mind when my time comes going to an abattoir but I at least want to know I have saved other animals being sent alive on those death ships! and intensive farms.

He saw his Mum then and rushed over to tell her the news!

Perhaps yabby and the wise miss piggy could turn their surprisingly vast intellect to pondering where the farcical limits of anthropomorphism really lie.
I suspect they'd be better at nailing it than some people...

Yabby
Was only a little baby lamb. He had not encounted such big words.
Jessey and the normally Quite Harriot set about taking control to answer this question.
Harriot even pulled one of her prized feathers to use as a pen. She waited for Jessey to finish eating all the Molasis.
When Jess declaired she was ready Harriot Placed The feather pen under Jess1s backside to produce the product in which they decided to reply to the turnrightleft letter.

Dear Turnrightturnleft
See if you can spot anyone! from the examples below: Wrote Harriot with all the other Farms Animals laughing!


The narcissist is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to
achieve his or her own ends. He is devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling
to identify with, acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences,
priorities, and choices of others. He is constantly envious of others and
seeks to hurt or destroy the objects of his or her frustration. Suffers from
persecutory (paranoid) delusions as he or she believes that they feel the
same about him or her and are likely to act similarly.

a.. Feels entitled. Demands automatic and full compliance with his or her
unreasonable expectations for special and favourable priority treatment;
a.. Is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to achieve his or
her own ends;
a.. Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify with,
acknowledge, or accept the feelings, needs, preferences, priorities, and
choices of others;
a.. Constantly envious of others and seeks to hurt or destroy the objects
of his or her frustration. Suffers from persecutory (paranoid) delusions as
he or she believes that they feel the same about him or her and are likely
to act similarly;
a.. Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent,
omniscient, invincible, immune, "above the law", and omnipresent (magical
thinking). Rages when frustrated, contradicted, or confronted by people he
or 'she" considers inferior to him or her and unworthy.

Yabby was rolling around laughung with Miss Piggy.
It was good to be free around real farmers and the animals.
He sure felt sorry for those city Slickers.

Wally arrived back to confirm he had dropped off the Letter and left his "calling card".

Yabby had arranged to meet Jess his favouite little girl lamb for lunch and treats when farmer Brown returned from Sunday Church.

Yabby was growing into a really handsome lamb. Others had tried to take his attention away from Jess.

Yabby at times played along with this but never went into the back paddock with any of the others.

He really liked Jess and was trying to get up the nerve to ask her for his first kiss.

Just as he was about to ask her Farmer Browns car pulled into the barn. He wasnt alone.

He had a lady with him that none of the animals had ever seen at the farm before.

A matter of fact nobody had seen any other lady at all since the boss got rid of the not nice second wife.

All the Animals gathered round to stare. Milly the mare was a little jealous but the farmer called her over knowing she was waiting to take him down to the bottom padock to take their Sunday afternoon ride along the creek.

He asked milly to tell all the other animals to come in one hours time as he had something important to tell them.

Milly trotted off feeling happy to be given such an honour and broke into a canter as she rushed to tell the cows in the back paddock.

A hour later just as the farmer promised he stood under the tree and told everybody there were some big changes to be made if they were to survive the drought.

He still had not introduced the lady and not even Miss Piggy was going to interrupt.

All The Animals held their breath wondering what was going to happen.

I wonder what is happening cried Jess. Shush replied Yabbys mother.

You will just have to wait along with the rest of us.

Golly. Yabby's a rather sensitive intellectual. Especially for a lamb.

One wonders what she makes of the notion, that someone would attempt to give her human qualities, in order to drum up sympathy for a particular cause.

While I suspect Yabby would agree that cruelty to animals is a worthy cause on its own, what of trying to persuade folk that they are incredibly intelligent, capable of complex reasoning and just like people.

Of course, were I to point out that this was a cheap emotional ploy, and while I support arguments against animal cruelty, I find this one deceitful, I'd probably be painted by this lamb as a narcissist.

I suppose it's a good thing that actual lambs would probably respond to this argument with 'baaaa.'

Besides the Yabbys of the world are incredibly tasty...rack of lamb marinated with garlic and rosemary (mmm baaa said yabby)....served with roasted vegetables and gravy...

Here Yabby have some more feed....

Oh do hurry Yourself Milly Jess Called out.


Milly was having fun in the free meadows, galloping up and down and chasing the others around the field to round them up.

Then standing still under tree she came across an injured young colt.

There was an old track that ran across this part of the feild and very often the boys would fling rocks at us to make us gallop.

Milly stopped and saw at once this colt was in pain.

She would have to think what was best to do for the little fella.

She knew if she didnt arrive back the master would come looking for them.
She also knew the little colt was scared and in pain and she was reluctant to drive him along to walk so far.

One thing she did know however that they were still lucky to have a master that cared.

There were ajoining farms where the owners bothered liitle to check their stock.

She knew the master had trouble with these boys before with indurying other animals.

He had suggested to their parents some farm animal education such as a farm stay or helping to milk to cows or something.

Nobody had listended and the kids were getting bigger and committing even more crimes around the area.

The master had demanded last time somebody was hurt that the police charged these boys.

However the police had said they could not do that because they were only children.

The master at that stage shouted at the police officer- Well if you dont teach the kids then charge the parents because there is no way I will stand by cruelty to my animals! See Here!

Milly stood still thinking of what to do.

Our Dear the master would be very cross indeed this time.

She looked again at the little colt with silent tears running down his eyes of pain.

She knew then what she would have to do.

Yabby would help her and she spun around like spinning on a five cent join and took off at a gallop!