The Forum > General Discussion > How Important Are Appearances?
How Important Are Appearances?
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Posted by Lexi, Wednesday, 14 December 2011 11:43:24 AM
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Lexi in the light hearted spirit you talk of, but truth too.
I think it matters like it or not at some stage in our life, if not always we know this and do our best to fit an image. Like actors on stage, middle of a shopping center voices are raised, to attract attention or such. However beauty is skin deep the real person is often so very much more than attractive , inside. I am puzzled by the increasing need to look good while behaving badly. Posted by Belly, Wednesday, 14 December 2011 3:03:30 PM
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I know I am only a sample of one, Lexi.
But I have certainly found over the years that being impossibly handsome has helped me in every facet of my life, from my career progression which has been unhindered, right through to my ability to select the perfect mate from the legions that pursued me. Mind you, it does occasionally have its drawbacks, as it did when George called me to ask if I could stay out of the same city as him, during his visit. But heck, a small price to pay. Posted by Pericles, Wednesday, 14 December 2011 3:10:36 PM
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Dear Belly,
I remember ages ago being told what to wear to a particular job interview at a very prestigious conservative institution. I followed the advice given to the letter and ended up getting the job which I later came to regret. It was the most hierarchical institution I'd ever worked for - and everything was done "according to the rules." I ended up leaving after a decent period of time. The name looked good on my CV - but despite the awesome atmosphere of the place (architecturally) - it was the most boring place on earth. As for people behaving badly? I've seen people being sick as a result of drinking too much. Not a good look. Dear Pericles, Why am I not suprised that you'd give George Clooney a run for his money? Silver foxes rule! Posted by Lexi, Wednesday, 14 December 2011 3:28:03 PM
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I think appearances, as distinct from beauty are very important.
To me, someone who takes some time in their presentation, is paying me a compliment. They are saying I'm worth them putting in the effort to present themselves well. I am turned off by the fad of young blokes presenting with a day or two of bumfluff on their chin & cheeks. It always seems to be the most SNAG types who do this, probably to try to look a little more masculine. There is nothing masculine in being unshaven. I am also turned off by those natty little beards, affected by some politicians, & many academics. In my experience the neater the beard the less value is the wearer. Having been forced to "grow" a couple of times, when I ran out of razor blades out in the islands, I know how much time it takes to keep them neat. Most wearers are not worth that much time. I am turned off by having to look away as a lady sits down, to avoid discovering what colour her knickers are today. Yes presentation says it all. On the other hand George Clooney or supermodel looks is an equal turnoff. I believe this is some sort of stereotyping of mine, & a weakness, but it is still there. In my experience the beautiful "honey pot" girl, with all the blokes buzzing around her was rarely worth the effort. I have never been interested in honey pot blokes. I am also turned off by fat people, which I equate with a slack personality, quite probably wrongly. But the association is there from my sport playing youth, & I have seen nothing to change it since. Perhaps if I followed Sumo wrestling, I may change that one. Posted by Hasbeen, Wednesday, 14 December 2011 5:57:47 PM
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oh lovely lively lexie...lets let it be lite
[by all means]..but hey let me be frank there is eye candy...and there is dependable randy andy see that animals pick their best mate..and pretty faces bring back the beast in us all.. so the beast mate with the best genes then settle down to raise the offspring.. via a good solid fathering..working man..in jeans the pretty face reminds me of the song ''when your in love with a beautiful woman'..[when you wed abouve your atation]..ie an ugly scores a pretty...[of either sex] the lovers love while the father parents right back to eve..who envisions god...while settling down with cro-magnumb [ape like adam]..so eve the ape..took the better genes..and were allk the better for it we should be selling his sperm then the world will become more ex-sitable... just as flirting or imagining..the fanta/see,.. boosts the loving in the head and the bed god bless you georgie let me have ya baby we gladly accept your discards keep aiming for the sky guy do go the teaze pleaze Posted by one under god, Thursday, 15 December 2011 5:52:14 AM
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What great posts I've been given thus far.
Thank You. I admit that I am influenced by appearances to a certain degree. I guess consciously or subconsciously we all are. Although probably more now than I used to be. I can't really criticise what people wear though. All I have to do is think back to some of the gear that I used to wear (cringe) ... (bra-less and an Afro come to mind). Dear Hasbeen, I agree with you about differentiating between appearances and beauty. I also dislike "fuzz" on a man's face. It does seem to be a bit of a trend now though. My younger brother (a school principal) and I have constant arguments about his facial hair. I suspect he's trying for the "academic" image - but he'd look so much better without it (in my opinion). As for George Clooney. I think he actually goes against the "stereotype" of "male model" or "Hollywood Hunk." That's possibly his drawcard. Dear Johan (OUG), Very clever post. Loved it! Posted by Lexi, Thursday, 15 December 2011 9:22:26 AM
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i didnt want to be probing too deep..or turn on any lite
but the rain has made me wet...allready..so how much more wet can i get? anyhow...couples play role play [or so sitcoms has taught me] so i will ignore the docter..for[play]way and the tv repair dude...and some other fantasims [that so readilly come to mind...and pass info as to why i think it is so] yesterday i cauight two incidences..that shed lite one on that 70's show...and the other on lesbe friends they both involved other 'attraction'' [plus..mention of the pay off..by staying mute] mood is everything..[i guess] its not the one..in the dark as much as the one..in the mind or whats on the mind..of the one besides us [in the marital bedhead]...but heck...we know our own mind gentle men dont talk genetal men do...[for that time that words arnt enough] OHHH..heck im taking the red pill the blue one makes my mind wander Posted by one under god, Thursday, 15 December 2011 11:31:15 AM
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Dear Johan (OUG),
I'm going to get a bit personal here (probably a mistake) but you've inspired me with your writing so I'm going to share what I found in one of my diaries writen back in 2000. Here goes: 2000 "I am grateful for the hug I got to give my father just before sailing for America. (He died of a massive coronary a few years later). I am grateful and proud of my family now - and proud of the way we look out for each other. I think of the love and pride I feel for my brothers, the peace I'm starting to find in my mother's presence. We can be open now I hope about needing each other. She needs a daughter and I need a Mum - and I can take pleasure in telling her of my affection, I know this time she won't be counting. My mother has been my biggest booster, I hers. I marvel at her capability with which she has organised her life. Will you look at my mother, I think. What a beautiful woman. What a knockout! I am grateful for the miracle of my marriage: that we managed to find each other, that we get to begin our days together, share our lives together, respect each other, support each other, and let the other be. Sometimes coming home at the end of the day, I worry that as in a dream it will all have disappeared. We should take nothing for granted. You know the Aztecs were terrified each night when the sun set that it would not rise again the next morning. They were grateful for each dawn. It takes a long time to become a person. Longer than they tell you. Longer than I thought. I am grateful for my past, it has given me the present. I want to do well by the future." Posted by Lexi, Thursday, 15 December 2011 11:55:35 AM
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Lexi, A little story for your brother.
I have twice sailed into Mooloolaba, in the old days, when it was still a fishing village. On both occasions I had taken a bit of a battering, during a longish passage at sea, & had for some time before that been with out razor blades. This is in the days when battery shavers were not of much use after a few months in the damp salty environment of a boat. I had many friends in the place in those days. After a couple of days, on both occasions I got round to buying some razor blades, & headed for the yacht club showers. When I emerged I ran into the club Commodore who exclaimed almost in shock, "Phil, you look 10 years younger without the beard". The next time some years later it was his wife who was the first one I met after shaving. She reached out & ran the back of her hand down my cheek & said, "MMM, much nicer without all that hair". I have not worn a beard since. Posted by Hasbeen, Thursday, 15 December 2011 12:44:40 PM
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Dear Hasbeen,
Thank You for sharing your experiences and while I appreciate your sharing - I don't think my brother's about to change. Also it doesn't help that his wife claims she likes his facial hair. Clever lady, she always backs him in everything (or at least in what she considers the "small stuff"). But I'll try and see how we go. He's got a good face - and he spoils it with all that unsightly fuzz. He's convinced it gives him an air of "authority." I can't complain about him too much I suppose. I used to be paranoid about hair lengths on women. Long was good, short was bad. Posted by Lexi, Thursday, 15 December 2011 1:24:05 PM
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Isn't it funny how we do tend to judge people by
appearances. We tend to go with what is acceptable social behaviour controlled by social norms - shared rules and guidelines that prescribe the appropriate behaviour in a given situation. Norms define how people "ought" to behave under particular circumstances in a particular society. For example if we were asked why do we eat with knives and forks, or why do men wear pants instead of skirts, or why do we marry only one person at a time - we'd probably say, "Because it's right." "Because that's the way it's done." "Because it's the custom." Or even, "I don't know." We expect people to keep their lawns mowed, to refrain from picking their noses in public, to show up on time for appointments and to wear a matching pair of shoes. Those who do not conform would probably be considered peculiar or eccentric. A man who walks down a street wearing nothing on the upper half of his body would probably today not get too much attention. However a man who walks down the street wearing nothing on the lower part of his body would probably get arrested. That's because the requirement in our society is that people cover their genitals and buttocks in public. The same as the desecration of the national flag and contemptuous use of religious symbols all bring a strong social reaction. Remember when long hair for men was frowned upon? When Mohawks were considered weird? Today - there's a much wider choice available - long hair, short hair, dyed hair, helmets, wigs, even bald heads. Still I wonder how many of us would react if our children shaved their heads, or wore green hair or sported wigs? Remember when blue jeans jeans were the traditional clothes of the working class. Today they are desirable "designer" items for members of the middle and upper classes as well. Posted by Lexi, Thursday, 15 December 2011 1:54:42 PM
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cuss toms are a funny thing...
is it still acceptable to powder your wig? or take a sniffter of the snuff box the pants issue im just not getting into it [hippy chicksas for egsample get hot when guys wear the dress [it reveals they can be pushed arround..given the right tempt-rational]...a skirt just makes one too accesable bonobo's for egsample would all wear skirts but i will zip on the issue as 365/24/7[oh]..keven would say ps my ex liked the beard..because it was constantly soft disliked my favourite member because he was allways hard hated fresh shaven stubble cause it was sharp refused to trim the hedge when it got too large so i sat back and let the weeds and seeds grow and thats all i care to let others know we rap as we did sow wether we shrink or grow one day i expect i will grow up its only a feeling..but feeling's pass Posted by one under god, Friday, 16 December 2011 6:58:51 AM
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If only I had known this yesterday, Lexi.
>>However a man who walks down the street wearing nothing on the lower part of his body would probably get arrested. That's because the requirement in our society is that people cover their genitals and buttocks in public.<< I suppose now I'll have to plead guilty. Drat. Posted by Pericles, Friday, 16 December 2011 8:11:41 AM
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Dear Pericles,
Don't ever plead guilty. Plead "religious beliefs!" ;-) Posted by Lexi, Friday, 16 December 2011 10:59:01 AM
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Dear Johan (OUG),
To each their own, I guess. Some like beards, I never did. Although I do like body hair on a man, I guess what many of us look for in a partner is someone who satisfies our emotional appetite. People either connect or they don't. Posted by Lexi, Friday, 16 December 2011 11:13:01 AM
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It looks like this thread has had its run
so Thanks to all who contributed and I want to wish everybody on this Forum - all the Joys of this Festive Season, and a Healthy, Safe, and Happy New Year 2012! Live, Love, and Be Happy! Posted by Lexi, Sunday, 18 December 2011 10:05:48 AM
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its the time of the year..for people to slow down i guess
that geriateric time of life as the world awaits the new year im trying to think laterally on appearances [where most of govt now is in hyatus] teachers resting...kids partying people getting ready to tell kids it appears...santa done it even my mind has switched into low gear [dragging words out of it isnt normally this hard] i guess i need a spark..a topic.. im missing the inputs of so many posters oh well this too will pass have a great time lexie and the rest of you.. too tired to post? we cant have said it all but then the topic speaks for itself cheers who took the ho out of xmass Posted by one under god, Sunday, 18 December 2011 10:38:18 PM
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Pericles...
it won't matter what you plead if the evidence doesn't stand up in court. Posted by WmTrevor, Sunday, 18 December 2011 10:47:14 PM
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Dear Lexi, your advice to plead 'religious beliefs' is a bold tactic and prompted me to do some further research overnight.
A better course of action is available when the law tries to deal with members of the public… Were his evidence felt by a magistrate to be of sufficient weight, the most satisfactory outcome for Pericles would be to ask for it to be discharged it out of hand. Posted by WmTrevor, Monday, 19 December 2011 7:08:01 AM
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Oooooh, you are awful, Wm Trevor!
>>Were his evidence felt by a magistrate to be of sufficient weight, the most satisfactory outcome for Pericles would be to ask for it to be discharged it out of hand.<< And the worst would be the magistrate's pronouncement, de minimis non curat lex. Posted by Pericles, Monday, 19 December 2011 8:15:31 AM
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Thank You Gentlemen - this is getting interesting.
And you're both wicked! "de minimus non curat lex," may well apply in the case of Pericles but I think that the Judge may ask for prima facie evidence as well as perhaps noting the practical advantages in this case of 'De Minimis," before making his judgement. Posted by Lexi, Monday, 19 December 2011 8:38:36 AM
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"And you're both wicked!"
"Ut est scaphium dico kettle niger", Lexi… You're the one who introduced the 'Emperor's no clothes' concept into your thread discussion. From your reply I can only assume that a successful outcome for Pericles is dependent upon the Judge requiring him to "sit on my prima facie and tell me that you love me"? There is precedent in the judgements of The Hon Mr Justice Benjamin Hill. Why do you assume the judge is male? Was it the wig or gown? Posted by WmTrevor, Monday, 19 December 2011 10:10:26 AM
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Dear Wm.Trevor,
Ah yes, Pot - kettle - black. I introduced the "Emperor's no clothes," concept - but you guys certainly embellished it. I merely responded. Chill. As Sacha Baron would say - "Can you take your finger out of my a..?" Posted by Lexi, Monday, 19 December 2011 12:40:16 PM
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I was chilled, Lexi, and the intention was convivial, not in the slightest was I meaning to be slighting. Merely attempting to continue the 'punny' approach to posts, as I enjoy the intellectual gymnastics this can involve when the exchange is light-hearted and well meant – I humbly accept not all my attempts at jokey sarcasm work.
As remediation I'll gift you a *non-convivial* line I had been saving up… …I think it's unfortunate the OLO layout places a photo of the author of this drivel above text which reads Article Tools!… Posted by WmTrevor, Monday, 19 December 2011 4:53:21 PM
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That might indeed present a challenge when presenting the evidence, Wm Trevor.
>>Why do you assume the judge is male?<< Although a good lawyer could always argue lex posterior. Posted by Pericles, Monday, 19 December 2011 5:04:08 PM
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ok some olo members dribble
http://emotevortex.blogspot.com/?v=0 for want of a better place to put it it moralises a summation of a guys blog page weaves arround a few issues...that prove..appearances arnt every thing and best its a cut and paste so hasdnt got my thick fingers all over it this court case thingy was that related to a dress or the bonbo ob-session anyhow we thought it was over so the edit is my alternate amusment Posted by one under god, Monday, 19 December 2011 5:04:21 PM
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That explains it Pericles, I've always got the concept of injunctive relief arse backwards.
Setting aside for the moment your novel concept of "…a good lawyer…", I accept your postulate in this case – as did the judge. [Sidebar: Are you as impressed as I am that Lexi is on such intimate terms with Sacha Baron Cohen?] Posted by WmTrevor, Monday, 19 December 2011 6:28:49 PM
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Dear WmTrevor,
I am surprised that you have taken things so seriously, and as Pericles once said, "Imagine if you'd thought that I was being facetious." ;-) Posted by Lexi, Monday, 19 December 2011 9:42:06 PM
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cont'd ...
BTW ; Why are you surprised about Sacha? We're both fans of professional wrestling, and we're both left-handed. Posted by Lexi, Monday, 19 December 2011 9:57:22 PM
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Dearest Lexi, thanks – an excellent demonstration of contrasting the important difference between appearance and substance.
Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the recipient who doesn't get it. In the above case me. I should have noticed your use of the appellation 'Dear 'rather than mentally tripping over 'Chill'. In a season of (how does it go) "Peaceing on the goodwill of all men on earth" I really was mortified that I'd been misapprehended. Plus, I was slightly annoyed that between Pericles and yourself, I've had to add a Latin to English translator link to my browser toolbar. Posted by WmTrevor, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 7:39:53 AM
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also… isn't it sad to think that 98% of lawyers give the rest of them a bad name?
Posted by WmTrevor, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 7:43:06 AM
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Dear WmTrevor,
You Sir, are a Class Act!" Merry Mistress and a Happy All Year! Posted by Lexi, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 10:24:04 AM
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cont'd ...
One final joke ... All About Appearance - The Yuppie and Yuppette, ever alert to "appearance" were both very concerned over the girl their son was dating. "Son..." the Father began, "I should think you'd be a little more particular over the company you keep." "Dad," the boy replied. "If you're talking about Mitzi, I'm sorry but she's the best girl I can get with the car I have." Oh dear. Posted by Lexi, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 1:25:42 PM
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ok my search for appearance jokes
http://www.google.com/search?q=appearance+jokes A woman says to her husband,..‘Our neighbour says I’ve got the skin of an eighteen-year-old girl.’ ‘Yeah?’ says the husband. ‘Well give it back. You’re getting it all wrinkled.’ Boy,..to friend,..‘What do you first notice in a girl?’ Friend, ‘It depends which way she’s facing.’ Don’t you love nature, despite what it did to you? Girl,..to boyfriend,..‘Do you think I’m vain?’ Boyfriend, ‘No. Why do you ask?’ Girl, ‘Because girls..as good-looking as me usually are.’ I have the body of a god – Buddha. The invisible man married an invisible woman. Their kids were nothing to look at. Time is a great healer, but a lousy beautician. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed. Why do more women pay attention to their appearance..than to improving their minds? Most men are stupid but few are blind. You’re dark and handsome. When it’s dark, you’re handsome. readers digest Change in Appearance--Tammy L. Vitulano While doing renovations in our house, one of the workmen paused to look at a flattering photo of me wearing makeup and a fancy gown. I heard him let out a low whistle and ask my son, Joshua, "Who’s that?" "That’s my mom," Joshua answered. "Wow," the man said,.."my mother doesn’t look like that." "Yeah," my son said, "well, neither does mine." MY wife asked me to look at the neighbours car and fix it...a job that took two days. Then I discovered the battery was dead and the starter was shot, so I fixed those too. Days later I proudly handed the woman her keys saying, "Now your car is good..for many more miles." "Thanks," she said. "All I care is that it runs..long enough to make it to the dealer. I’m trading it in tomorrow. Posted by one under god, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 5:52:54 PM
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Dear Johan (OUG),
Thanks for the jokes. Enjoyed them very much. Will add them to my collection. Posted by Lexi, Tuesday, 20 December 2011 7:16:57 PM
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George Clooney is in Australia and a woman's magazine
is , running a competitiion, "Win a date with George
Clooney." This gave me the idea for this thread.
How important is a person's appearance in the way
we respond to them? Or does a person's appearance
not matter in the slightest?
For Example,
"Some men are handsome, some are not
A female looks at what they've got
She may marry Mickey Rooney
But in her dreams it'll be - George Clooney!"
Agree - Why? Why not?