A bit of a change of pace this one, getting away from politics.

so what is the norm these days with regards to a relationship.

Me personally, i hav been married for some 26 years, have two great grown up kids and a wife i intend to spend te rest of my life with.

is that normal, or am i in the minority these days?

the norm
[that reminds me of an advert featuring a fat dude]

so i will skip past that image
the typical in any relation ship..is a faith or trust
that rests on past glories and past mistakes..as much as past performance.

its a big early to roll over with a big hug
if yopu know that we are gouing to go back to yesterday
about how i didnt clean the toilet good enough for you
or how i could be entitled to half your wealth..just for cleaning house[and serving your image;our kids]

darn this could have been such a good marriage
but i keep remembering the things you said only yesterday
you think i can forget how much you hurt me..when you found those finger prints on your glass of beer?

your allways finding fault
[dont think i dont read what you wrote on that forum
that your allways writing to]

i talked to a lawyer yesterday
he said we should both get insurance
and that that was the way to make me happy

im not sure what the next step is
but he said lets do this propperly..[this time]
so lets get insurance..just in case you get food poisening

heck im only messing with ya
you take things too serious
lets go mountain climbing or bumgy jumping
that might make us both feel better

i ran this past norm[my lawyer/lover]
and norm agrees.,.this is the best course
for all of us

Rehctub, given your 26 years of servitude you and your partner are the "old" norm, ie we tend to mate for life, like swans.

I have two friends from childhood who married early had kids early and all went well for about 26 years. Some years ago he came to me with the news that he was considering leaving the relationship now that the kids were out on their own. Asking why, he said he had fallen in love with a neighbor’s wife (the husband was a "friend" of his) and her marriage would also end because of this relationship.

I told him that his wife was faithful honest and caring but that carried no currency with his emotions. He summed it up this way, he had more of his life behind him than in front and he would not stay in the relationship for the time he had left, he had been up till then a faithful husband, a good provider and a good father but now he wanted to fulfill his wants and needs, he felt time was running out so he caused a family tribulation that lasted for a time but all settled down eventually and now he and his ex seem happy with their new partners.

Personally if it was me I would be in a real dilemma of conscience as to whether I should shatter a loyal partner’s life because of a new found emotional need. Unless you are a morally corrupt bastard I believe ending a relationship of this tenure is as difficult for the one that wants out as it is for the collateral damage visited on the partner. Emotions rule some of us more than others, some sacrifice their needs for the partner and some see themselves as all they have.

darn..that was a bit harsh
[and mean and nasty]...i clearly took it too far

so appologise
if only we could taker that loving side with us intio the world
that our friends and family see..[i treat others as we would like others to treat us'...but sadly in the heat of the living moment

we sometimes push things too far

look i respect much of what you say
and this question deserves serious reply

but there is no normal
we each are unique..we each have
our own face..hold control over our own mind

should be able to hold our tongues..
and but out of others relationships

so beg you to take the sting off
any words i accidentally pushed into your thread

its great you think of your family
and trust us enough to mention your spouse

but the words have been wrote
and the regret will outlast...their possable hurt

i was trying to make a point with humour
but in the end found the joke was on me
and await my karma

ok im trying to clarify
we all need things...to get out of bed in the morning

we each have the choice..to awake with seritonin[the love drug]
or adrenilin..[like those agressive walkers/runners/swimmers]

its said that married men live longer
this is due to the diose of seritonin..we get in waking up with a hug..or hugging[as compared to those who jump right in with adrenolin[exersize]..that puts the edge on us..till lunch time.

its hard to desribe or perscribe...your addiction
[yours is used genericlly]...we often need to catch up on the news of the day..to wit adrenolin...and these adicts get depressed if they cant get their fix

that is the norm these days

the love junkies have it all over us
[thus the excuse...to never go to sleep angry]..holds its true value

there is so much more to the topic
but we are either one or the other
ie a grumpy thoughtless bum..blaming others
or loving the living..who dares to love

in this time of fear/hate/shame blame..ie [adrenolin]

the powers that be want us charged with adrenolin
cause therein lies the flight or flight response

but thats enough for me at this time
lets hear from the many [ok few]..others
who know how to get the seritonin..by virtue of hugs

its not an either or choice
just like one is either an alpha or a beta

what is important to add
is that as we chose our drugs
so too does good or vile spirit
get attracted to the drug?..we emmit

its energy
as much for them as us

so i regret feeding the dark energy
with the earlier adrenolin charged posting

it would be great if life was simple
but its not...[what is normal for some..is abnormal for others]

take the child/mother bond..[as an egsample]
where everytime a child cries...it gets either a bottle or a hug
[so if the child in later life comfort eats
is this too much bottle comfort

or if the child has an addiction to 'love'
them yearning for loves seritonin fix

then we get avoidances
where its not so much avoiding a particular thing
as much as avoiding the pain of rejection..or other unpleasentness

like i hate posting..or putting my soul out there
and that having had 4 topic rejected in a row..means i now will avoid ever starting another topic..

because the hope of discussion..
isnt worth the pain of rejection...
much the astage im reaching with this topic

we are so predictable...so think of those studies
where students were made guards over other students ,labled 'prisoners'..

ya think the adrenolin the oppressors felt..
didnt help them..become like them other lot..in quantonimo

i watched regretfully last nights sbs 10 oclock docco
[hot docs]..'you dont like the truth'

where we witnessed a youth..omar khadr..
[under 16 years old]

being questioned...by a 'good cop'..a 'felow canadian'
that i stopped watching after him crying out
for his mother..[for 60 minutes]

that wasnt adrenolin
but the fruit of it

just like all normal relations are the various fruits
of our various acts...

omar boasted..and was taught
by previous abuses..what 'they' wanted to hear

the crying for mum thing
was after they called him a liar..when he recanted the lIES
he told them yesterday...

[ie the lies he WAS TAUGHT..they wanted to hear]

this single event
upset me greatly