Thanks for the responses.

I agree in self promotion for a job - I get to do that a lot when auditioning and treat it as fun - a way to get outside myself. I am normally a quiet observant type (like you Lexi raised to be modest) but I have a lot of fun doing improvisation and a completely different person can emerge.

For the topic the person I was referring to is the type who actually believe that boasting of materials possessions or superiority in a field or mental acuity is an indication of confidence.

A truly confident person does not need to brag. I am not saying I don't enjoy attention, but any compliments I receive are truly when completely unexpected.

Another example of what I mean is the difference between confidence and arrogance. Here is some info:

"1. Confidence vs arrogance both involve believing in one’s abilities.

A person who is confident understands they have certain areas of strength. A person who is arrogant also believes that have certain areas of strength.

A person with confidence will also understand others maybe stronger, and that each person is a complete package of strengths and weaknesses so will remain humble in both. An arrogant person will often neglect to acknowledge weakness in light of playing up the strengths.

2. Confidence vs arrogance often stem from two different roots.

Arrogance is often underplayed by insecurity. An arrogant person tends to be arrogant to compensate for areas of weakness that distress the individual.

An arrogant person may seem to ignore any areas of weakness and only play up areas of strength, but they often do so because of an inability to come to terms with weakness. A confident person finds the root of their confidence in self acceptance - a key confidence vs arrogance difference.

A confident person accepts their weaknesses or faults, even though they may not like them. This acceptance enables the confident person to handle faults with grace and without further compacting the areas of weakness with arrogance. These are key points when understanding confidence vs arrogance."

Cont'd

"3. The effects of confidence vs arrogance on relationships clearly mark the difference between the two characteristics. An arrogant person tends to brag and can put others down in an attempt to be the best or come out the coolest.

A confident person is above such antics. They recognize their strengths and weaknesses, and allow that other people will have strengths and weaknesses. A confident person need not make life a competition, so a confident person is often much easier to be around.

An arrogant person can be cocky and difficult to reason with, making conversation difficult and bothersome."

This type of behaviour is a conversation stopper, on Online Opinion it is a waste of time. Instead of holding an interesting discussion we find ourselves at worst, wanting to vomit at the unbelievable boasts or if we try to remonstrate are told we are jealous.

Now a positive effect can be resultant laughter, but in hyperspace no-one can hear you laugh.

The boastful person remains blissfully(?) unaware that values they think are worthy of respect are not those of others. For example Donald Trump's values would be completely (almost) opposite to those of the Dalai Lama or even a school teacher or nurse.

This is a very interesting subject, and boasting is something we all do on the odd occasion - and it's always to enhance ourselves in the eyes of others, which in turn makes us feel valued.

If we look at it from societal angle, the "middle-class" didn't waste anytime trying to ape the conspicuous and grandiose expression of the upper classes. With the rise of industry and trade, there came this broad class, full of nit-picking insecurities, desperate to prove themselves and emulate their "superiors". The Victorians achieved it by filling their houses with all kinds of material kitsch and tat - anything that implicitly implied that they had "made it". There's a great classic titled "Diary of a Nobody" that fictionalises the great British middle-class aspirant of that time.

Margaret Thatcher is another great example of middle-class "arrogance and boastfulness". Her droning pomposity is most notable for the total absence of any kind of "wit". (reminds me of a braggart I've col-lided with recently, whose name escapes me at present).

So while bragging is a general human foible, when regularly encountered, it's a particularly ingratiating and irritating habit of those who seek approval from the world at large in place of self-affirmation.

'This is a very interesting subject, '

Well, more interesting is the motivations of a person who would get themselves in such a tizz about such things, or feels they need supporters in scoring some kind of point against our Col (for one, I assume) and maybe myself if I was to ever consider that people don't find me the pinnacle of humility.

It strikes me as childish in the extreme.

'So while bragging is a general human foible, when regularly encountered, it's a particularly ingratiating and irritating habit of those who seek approval from the world at large in place of self-affirmation.'

When regularly encountered it could also be appreciated by intelligent, in-tune and more mature and worldly individuals as a playful tongue-in-cheek indulgence that just has the added bonus of riling up the insecure and immature.

I think I know who's seeking approval and passive-aggressively appealing for supporters rather than being an adult and dealing with people as they come.

'A truly confident person does not need to brag.'
And a truly confident person would not have behaved like this; A backhanded cry to the teacher and appeal for support from the 'good' people whoa aren't like 'those people'.

'If you dare mention anything about yourself which you are proud of, the bragger is highly likely to attempt one oneupmanship, and so to make light of your own achievements.'
This is self-contradictory, as if this is so upsetting, then by definition you are just as much a bragger and no doubt even more insecure than the original bragger.

'Whatever the reason, how to get them to stop?'
What gives one the arrogance to think that they should control the actions of another because of their own discomfort or belief that their own perceptions of that person are central to the world.

Anyway, it's an interesting insight into the thread author. It says a lot.

Why do People Brag About Themselves?...lol...Online opinion just shines with people who dont mind bragging about how intelligent they are by showing off their analyzing skills, to everyone on the NET:) talk about putting yourself under your own microscopic analysts:) for a person just to be on-line shows the point your trying to make.

Its all starts at birth......

Should be a great thread....Ammonite, the human mind is indeed an interesting and thought provoking subject.

LEAP

One reason braggarts do not wake up to themselves is the sycophant:

"Sycophancy is as old as politics and power, as old as human social life. At least, the origin of the word goes as back as the 16th century, traced to the Latin sycophanta, from the Greek, sukophantes."

The original Greek adds a new dimension to suck-up doesn't it?

A sycophant will also defend their hero by denigrating any who have the temerity to point out that the emperor has no clothes. While they are entertaining to watch, without them Caesar would have wielded no power, Ghengis Kahn would've remained a mere horseman.

" No one likes the idea of being classified as a sycophant. Yet without question there are legions of followers who sing the praises of their favorite online voices without fail, all in hopes of garnering favor and being a part of the in-crowd. Entire businesses and social networks have been built on the back of the die-hard loyalist....

What’s different from being a crazed sports fan and a blind follower of your favorite voice online? Not much. In fact, the behavior patterns are very similar in nature. Sycophants are beyond fanatic sports fans. They do unmindful things such as propagating bad ideas, mimicking style rather than developing their own, and flash mobbing others, all to curry favor and feel a part of that favorite voice’s community."

Cheers