Throttling down the highway with my daughter aside,the music is grand but then comes the punctuated plethora of nasal ads attacking my masculinity.

Will I suffer per-mature destination at the juncture of this inference? The smirk was bad enough,but really daughter,I surmise
silently,"You may not have existed,had the moment not been so pressing!"

Has secret women business betrayed us in the name of lustful longevity? So now we have nasal interruptus fracturing the path of our sysnapses,separating expectation and duty.Duty of care? Nay! Duty to the the great god of doing anything better and longer.Duty to the collective consciousness of the trendoid media mogels.

The corporate invasion of my nasalways is threatening to fleece my wallet.No; I won't cop you later! Now is the moment,since I'll never let that corporate leverage beat my impotence!

A little humour on the topic.

I had an older guy in my shop the other day and we were talking about the ‘is your man a two minute noodle man’ ad.

His reply was “I love it, I have sex and my noodles are still warm”.

I thought it was a crack up!

Just stirring the pot rehctub.Thought I might stir a few feminists.I'm just really over these stupid nasal spray ads.Surely they can be a lot more subtle and creative and still get their message across? They are implying that we all should be marathon men and women.Well many of us need our sleep so we can work to afford the products they are flogging.

They are trying to embarass and goad men into using their product.If the same tactics were used on women or racial minority group,you'd never hear the end of it.

Dear Arjay,

Talking about ads with the 'cringe' factor...

Have you seen the one for women that
features a 'beaver?' (for care 'down there.').

It seems that good taste is not the primary
objective of ads - no matter at which gender
they're directed.

Arjay, I too hate the new nasal spray technology directed at poor guys who never get there, or get there too early! The only ones that seem to win in these situations are the drug companies.

However, I very much doubt if it is the feminists driving this new technology Arjay. Most of us women look forward to when things 'start to slow down a little' as we age.

Having the men continue on at full speed when the women are ready to naturally slow things down is not always desirable!

Maybe this new technology is driven by mens groups wanting to recapture their youthful enthusiasm with younger women?

My cardiologist told me the nasal spray does not work and it is more a scam, designed to break the ice and get you in the door to try the "injections" as the next (more expensive) step.

I must admit as I push relentlessly toward the big 60, my "stamina" has had a revival, largely due to my new fiance, soon to be my wife...

She does what viagra and so many other things fail to do because.... as my cardio said.. most of the "problem" is actually in the head....

wasnt sure about this topic from the start...but have noticed a systemised attack on men..[or more specificly fathers...that begun long before the simpsonesque homer father type

see how many sitcom's get their rhyme and reason from emascul;ating the father figure as an imbisile or sterio typical retard of some form or other

we have long noticed the feminisation of the male[have obseerved the estrogens emoinating from plastic are doing their bit hormonally..[have observed the falling sperm counts...

who can pretend suprise that now..the means to retain your manhood involve a phalic penetration of your nostril cavity...to help you feel more like a man

you have to love this subtill realignment of just what a man must be to be a man...you lot of defaulting fathers are on notice...

dont pretend..to feel your warm fuzzy femine side...you have become that you loved...how to find the right word..your a lot of cats...nope kittens...no puppies..getting closer...numbnutters

butt no..your a mob of ppp...forgive the spelling of it..pud pulling pathetic paternal putrabrances..postulating perpetualised prostalic proclamations...preporting perpetual prosperity of the personable paternal pooofutta ...

perpurloining perculularities particular to patriarchal paticipant particularities..prevailing perpetually particulrilly per pervieuwing pressingly pert perversions..pre-ejeculating pressing proclamations preceeding persistant portent purposly predestined purveyance portaining persistantly..pressingly permantly per persuant prepubesnt pussies..polaXED per propagandist postulations persistant portrayed personalised persistantly per privatised productions programed persistantly into pestulant predicktive programing

It all depends on how you look at things. In the 'good ol days' women were frigid. Now, it seems the modern attitude is that men must be sexual athletes and every sex session the women must orgasm 15 times before she says, 'ok, you may finish now'.

'Wham bam thank you Ma'am' has been replaced by 'Think of your Granma or Thatcher for 2 hours trying not to enjoy yourself, because no woman cums too slowly yo'know, you're just inadequate.'

I think the phrase that comes to mind is 'Own your Orgasm'.

Really man. People should lighten up. I seem to remember sex is supposed to be fun. Somebody has to come first! But what's wrong with continuing in other ways until both people are satisfied. There's lots more to sex than penetration.

Aww yeah
That`s right baby.
Girl, tonight we`re gonna make love. You know how I know, baby? `Cause it`s Wednesday. And Wednesday night is the night that we make love. Tuesday night`s the night that we go and visit your mother, but Wednesday night is the night that we make love. `Cause everything is just right conditions are perfect. There`s nothing good on TV. Conditions are perfect. You lean in close and say something sexy like, "I might go to bed I`ve got work in the morning." I know what you`re trying to say baby. You`re trying to say, "Oh, yeah. It`s business time. It`s business time."

It`s business.
It`s business time.
That`s what you`re trying to say you`re trying to say let`s get down to business it`s business time.

It`s business.
It`s business time.
Next thing you know we`re in the bathroom brushing our teeth. That`s all part of it, that`s foreplay. Then you go sort out the recycling. That`s not part of it but it`s still very important. Then we`re in the bedroom. You`re wearing that ugly old baggy t-shirt from that team building exercise you did for your old work. And it`s never looked better on you.

Oh, team building exercise `99.

Oh, you don`t know what you`re doing to me.
I remove my jeans but trip over them `cause I still got my shoes on. But I turn it into a sexy dance.
Next thing you know I`m down to just my socks and you know when I`m down to just my socks what time it is�it`s time for business. It`s business time.

It`s business.
It`s business time.
You know when I`m down to just my socks it`s time for business that`s why they call it business socks.

It`s business.
It`s business time.
Oh.
Ooh, makin` love.
Makin` love for two.
Makin` love for two minutes.
When it`s with me you only need two minutes, `cause I`m so intense. Two minutes in heaven is better than one minute in heaven. You say something like, "Is that it?" I know what you`re trying to say. You`re trying to say, "Aww yeah, that`s it." Then you tell me you want some more. Well I`m not surprised. But I`m quite sleepy.

It`s business.
It`s business time.
Business hours are over. Right, right.

It`s business.
It`s business time.

I hope some the people flogging these products can be in the future more subtle and creative.I'm not bagging the product if they satisfy a need and do work.I wonder if they realise that their advertising is a having a reverse effect.

I noticed Col was quiet of late.I'm happy for you Col.I hope it all works out.

Cheers all.

Houellebecq I am not quite sure about your Wednesday roster.

When I met my fiancé, on our second to sixth date, which took place on consecutive days, several times during this time I said to her.. ah this is all foreplay… which she initially did not understand but that is exactly what it was … and glorious it was too.. the building of intimate tensions, prolonged over time, rather than being spent too soon….

Like you said “There's lots more to sex than penetration.”

And then, of course, there is après-play… which not some analytical dissection to speed / lowness, positions ticked off or performance standards ……

but just relaxing and enjoying the soft afterglow….

Arjay “I noticed Col was quiet of late.I'm happy for you Col.I hope it all works out.”

Thank you Arjay..

Being quiet…. Yes, I have been diverted upon more important matters for the past couple of months (fledgling lurve……)

And to working out…… it most certainly will

No Arjay, I feel it's up to us to give these poor imagination challenged add people, something easy to do, & it does help the feminists with their inferiotity complexes.

There are a lot of small minded people in our communities, & it's up to us to help them out, with something to laugh at, or at very least, something to talk about. If they are so small minded they have nothing better than me to talk about, they have my sympathy, & I feel obliged to help.

I can't get anywhere near Col, [good on you mate, may you both have fun], as far as a tongue wagging topic, but I have just put my big V8 engined, 30 year old sports car back on the road, after an 18 month restoration. This one's a convertible, so it's much easier to get into, & out of.

Come to think of it, I did have my gorgeous 20 year old daughter come with me to a classic car show a few weeks back, & then drive the coupe in convoy with me to another. Perhaps I have made it to the dirty old man class, with all the new chums around here.

Probably not, a mate told me a couple of the younger new chums were asking where they could meet the beautiful "new" chick. She only lived here for 16 years,

Why mention your daughter here at all? What a strange man you are Arjay.. but i always suspected you were.

Why mention my daughter Rainer? I know a couple of men who have young daughters if 10 -12yrs and they find crass ads like this very distaseful.I still believe in standards and respect and children being able to enjoy their childhood.

Perhaps rainer,you have shifted the goalposts to suit your own agendas and a chance to have a snipe at me.

Foxy,
Your beaver reference reminded me that I'm getting old. When I first saw the ad I had no idea what the ad was about! I even wondered why a beaver a foreign animal, rather than a wombat to advertise what ever it was advertising?
It wasn't until we watched the ad show on Ch 2 that either my wife or I knew what it meant. Even my 23 yo daughter admits to having to ask at work.

The symbolism in that ad is pure male subconscious fantasy ?
The guys looking in the window at the girl's beaver....one track minded or perversion? either way the ad wins the cringe award for me followed by the Titan shed ads. What I would like to do with the sheds is reminiscent of the advertisers beavers.

Late night TV assumes if you're male you are either functionally impotent or have a fetish for porn. I swear that if naughty Nikki offer to show me what she and her Asian girlfriends get up to on my mobile one more time revenge is impendent. Grrrrrr
I never cease being amazed how simpleminded advertisers think we are.
Nothing to say ad in sex references and bingo. Strueth!

Hasbeen.. thank you for your good wishes…

Just to follow on from Foxy/examinators line of discussion -

I would note, the “Beaver” in indigenous to North America and ….

Thus, you will find no “Beavers” in

Brazil........

Hasbeen "perhaps I've made it to the dirty old man class.."There is no sin in looking. A couple of yrs ago we went to a 21st and there were some seriously attractive girls there.A group of us oldies with a few beers under our belts had delusions of grandeur when we thought that some hot sorts were giving us the eye,until I observed they were looking right through us at the young studs behind.Bummer!

Never stop looking,it keeps you young at heart and the girls happy.

“Thus, you will find no “Beavers” in

Brazil........”

Well that’s weird, hubby came back from a business trip in Brazil and I recall him mentioning that he’d never seen such good looking beaver everywhere.

Pied Piper.. Brazil is the home of the "brazilian" (as well as Brazilians).... not the "beaver"...

it is an either/or situation but it cannot be both.

Col that's a classic. No beavers in Brazil!

I wonder if there is any conservation movement.

I generally use cricket analogies (grass on the wicket etc) when it comes to this sort of thing. In fact I can talk to a few mates purely in terms of cricket and the WAGS just don't seem to get it for some reason.

"Pied Piper.. Brazil is the home of the "brazilian" (as well as Brazilians).... not the "beaver"...

it is an either/or situation but it cannot be both."

Oh, maybe it was when he got back from Spain.

There are a few countries he is not allowed to return to during my life time

Pied Piper, You said

"Well that’s weird, hubby came back from a business trip in Brazil and I recall him mentioning that he’d never seen such good looking beaver everywhere". I think you meant to type 'anywhere'.

He told you that AFTER he got home. Now give him a kiss for paying you a nice compliment.

I once mentioned the 'map of Tassie' and the boss replied that now it was more like Russia!

"Well that’s weird, hubby came back from a business trip in Brazil and I recall him mentioning that he’d never seen such good looking beaver everywhere".

Banjo:”I think you meant to type 'anywhere'.

He told you that AFTER he got home. Now give him a kiss for paying you a nice compliment.”

Banjo baby, don’t be a smart arse. I think it was Spain, something about gorgeous women there and beautifully dressed. I think the story about Rio was more about the guns and not being very safe place.

He came back from Canada with a story about strip clubs and how the patrons throw gold coins at the dancers – struck me as rather cheap and mean but he’s not allowed to go back there now.

He said nothing about females in England so he’s still allowed there. He was in Los Vegas a couple of months ago, never said a word about the place. Maybe the boy is learning.

Pied piper,
I wasn't trying to be a smart arse. It does not matter if he had been in Spain or Rio. I think he was paying you a compliment.

The Canada thing does sound a bit cheap and I thought they were more conservative than the Yanks. I also thought coins went out with pre war belly dancers in the ME.

Col is right, beaver is a yank term, around here it is the 'map of Tassie' The boss mumbled something about hot wax so I retired to the shed before it cost me more money. Did not get the cuppa I came in for either.

Between TPP, banning hubby from visiting the lands of the hirsutely denuded

and Banjo waxing lyrical (or not waxing, as the case may be) about the Tasmanian “bush”,

we seem to have found yet another way to skin a cat (or should that be “pussy”?).

What's all this beaver talk? A try hard with no class? I like people who give it a go no matter how low on the social scale.Years ago at uni there was a derogatory term given to young women ie "turtles" and I didn't get it at first."Well when they on their backs they're f*#ked."This was a case of masculine bravado destroying communication with it's opposite.Not very smart.

Class is not class unless it is backed by courage, tenacity and empathy for others.

I suppose it is like all these "natural" remedies that "may" help in various ways.

It is the thought that counts, as the placebo effect has been shown to work.