Hold the boat a minute!

Now I'm completely confused: in a previous incarnation Antiseptic went into detail on a few occasions about how his mother had brought him up in a feminist environment and gave this as his reason for disliking feminists.

Now we hear "I was brought up to respect women and to go out of my way to be courteous, "gallant", forgiving of their foibles, protective of their weaknesses and all of the rest of the traditional male virtues" - the very antithesis of a feminist upbringing - but gives this as his reason for disliking other kinds of women.

Then there was the news that his parter was going to have a baby which was duly born and gave him a reason to dislike breast-feeding women.

Now he claims to be single and says he has not met any woman at all he can honour. (which would include, presumably, the mother of his latest child).

What's going on here really?

Romany:"Antiseptic went into detail on a few occasions about how his mother had brought him up in a feminist environment"

In that case, please point out where, with a quote, because I've said no such thing. I was raised in a traditional family unit, 1 father, 1 mother and my grandmother lived with us until she dies when I was about 13. Off you toddle, the list of my posts is freely available and you've obviously got lots of time on your hands.

Romany:"Then there was the news that his partner was going to have a baby which was duly born and gave him a reason to dislike breast-feeding women."

Another "quote" that doesn't exist. As it happens, I think breastfeeding is an important function in the earliest stages of life, but I also think that some women try to "milk" that function into a career at home, paid for by the Govt and the ex. I don't respect those people or their intent.

2 down, 1 to go.

Romany:"Now he claims to be single and says he has not met any woman at all he can honour. (which would include, presumably, the mother of his latest child)"

Oh dear me, Romany, you really must try to read what is said, instead of trying to put your own rather tepid spin on it. I have two children by the one woman, to whom I was married. That relationship ended some 9 years ago but you're right, I don't have any respect for the personal sense of honour of my ex-wife and frankly, bugger all for you, dear. I don't have much time for dishonest people.

That's 3 out of 3 outright lies, Romany. No wonder you don't get much sex.

I know this will probably sound like
a cliche - but I was raised with the
ethos that, "It's not who we meet along
life's highway that matters; it's how
we treat them."

And so far, it's worked out rather well...

Relationships aren't easy - but if there's
give and take on both sides. If you try your
hardest to make things work - you usually
succeed. Of course there are impossible
situations - where no matter what you do -
you're mis-matched and nothing works - then
perhaps walking away may be the best option.

Yabby, I hope that one day you will find the
partner who satisfies all of your appetites.

I wish you All The Best.

Prostitution is simply sex as commodity. This works fine for people who are more comfortable separating the sexual act from the complications of an ongoing intimate relationship with another person. Some people are simply unable to articulate their feelings and needs in personal relationships and no doubt would be better off simply paying for sex than trying to have long term relationships which are doomed to failure, causing pain and suffering for all involved.

I have seen plenty of evidence of the above mentioned from a few of the posters to this thread. For example, to paraphrase Yabby, “blokes who bring home the bacon are entitled to sex whether their partner is interested or not” missing the point that both partners work whether in paid employment or in domestic chores.

And then followed up by this quote by Yabby from Brainsex: “98% of women according to an American study, wanted men to talk to them more, about their own personal thoughts, feelings, plans, emotions.
81% of women say it is they who initiate deep conversations, trying very hard to get men to express their innermost thoughts and feelings. Nearly 75% of women in long term relationships had finally given up trying to achieve a closer emotional bond.”

And then assuming that all men are like him in not wanting close emotional bonds with their partners. Yabby, men are not a single homogenous group, for which I am profoundly grateful.

Cont'd

Cont'd

So, there are still men trapped in the idea that males don't want to express their feelings to anyone especially their life partners (which prompts the question who do they talk to?) and still think of sex as something that women provide FOR them, that a woman refusing to have sex is somehow 'denying them' – never occurs to these men that women are denying sex for themselves as well and that there is a reason for it. These men will never find out the reason because 'talking about feelings' is female 'stuff' and, therefore, not applicable to them.

While men like this refuse to consider that it takes two people to have a relationship, prostitution will continue to do very well. And prostitutes thank you for that.

To A-septic,

LOL, when I read your claim “I was brought up to respect women and to go out of my way to be courteous, "gallant", forgiving of their foibles, protective of their weaknesses and all of the rest of the traditional male virtues.” I guess that must be when you are not posting online.

However I say thank you kind sir, as I too was brought to respect men and go out of my way to be courteous, gallant, forgiving of their foibles, protective of their weaknesses and all the rest of the traditional female virtues.

Therefore, I feel sorry for you and Yabby that you have been so unsuccessful in maintaining long term relationships and that you cannot reflect on your part in those failures. You bring out my protective instincts with your vulnerabilities. I suggest, perhaps, a course in meditation would at least help with your anger if not your ability to communicate in a courteous fashion to others

Antiseptic,

I do beg your pardon and apologise most sincerely. I obviously made a big mistake and got you confused with someone else. I don't follow OLO as regularly or as avidly as I once did - so the persona seem to have become a little muddled. I really put my foot in it that time, didn't I?

I had to grin at your parting shot, though. Having never once on OLO made any mention at all of my current personal circumstances - while freely discussing past issues - I'm also a little mystified at how you managed to draw that conclusion: or is a bad sex life something you just wish on those you don't respect? In this instance however, that's one shot in the dark that went so wide of the mark I'll dine out on it for months!

Once again, please accept my apologies for my previous post. Cheers.