"Melinda Tankard Reist may describe herself as a feminist, but I believe she is more motivated by her pro-life, right-wing Christianity — and her organisation’s half-arsed “girl-power” message is a convenient way to communicate those values to young girls. (Particularly ones with unwanted pregnancies.)"

Too right. I was involved in trying to get the abortion pill RU 486 through Parliament and one of the loudest opponests was Reist. Feminist? Bollocks.

Further, this advertising. Don't take it too seriously. The sexualisation of young girls in advertising is something else.

Prue Goward is about as Right as they come, and she is a feminist (whatever it really means).

I am sickened by the sexualisation of children, but I do not see any issue as rendering another less important.

Vanilla I read the Age opinion piece about the flip side of fantasy and the author raises some interesting and valid points.

Whilst reading the article memories kept popping in my head of ads that make me feel uncomfortable, my kids like listening to a certain radio station which sadly has about 6 ads in 30 minutes to do with erectile dysfunction during the day.

My kids haven't reached puberty and yet they are bombard with ads about erectile dysfunction, not to mention the radio hosts often talk about masturbation, ejectulation etc. So when I heat them talking about these subjects I chage stations with the excuse I want to hear the news or the traffic report.

I loved this phrase;

"Firstly, no one much cares what males think when it's their desires being appealed to and indulged, "

"so the average man can never win that woman in the airbrushed picture, however much he strives for power, money and six-pack abs."

"But for boys and men, arousal of this kind is forced on them dozens of times a day, every single day, since before they can even remember."

Only a dozen times a day? He must be getting old! ;))

What Simon doesn't mention is that males spend an enormous amount of time and effort trying to suppress or block out sexual arousal and that there is huge guilt trip being laid on men for being aroused or from becoming aroused.

I think that there are some or a lot of women who both resent this and desire it. In another blog one woman was lamenting the fact that her boyfriend had lost interest in sex and as such she felt undesirable.

She wrote' "it feels strange not to be desired that way."

In the oppositions paper is another blog by James Foster;

"Men don't think. That is why we have women. They do all the thinking for us. They tell us what things to do, when to do them, how they should be done and why we are doing them. "

Seeker,
If feminists succeed in scaring women away from men with their “men are violent” campaigns, then the only thing left in women’s lives are themselves, and their fantasies, and perhaps a mirror.

Ginz,
You seem very confused. You call yourself a feminist, but then you say you don’t know what it means. Maybe you think it fashionable to call yourself a feminist.

James H
James Foster seems another confused soul. He is quite possibly a feminist, and cannot think of a positive thing to say about men. Maybe he should stop calling himself a man, and start calling himself a fashionable feminist.

James — I’m so glad you liked this article, and you make many excellent points.

“What Simon doesn't mention is that males spend an enormous amount of time and effort trying to suppress or block out sexual arousal…”
I think he touches on that at the end, but that really deserves its own article.

“… and that there is huge guilt trip being laid on men for being aroused…”
Yes. But I would an aside on “being made to.” I hate the passive voice. (I’m talking grammar here: “to be” + part paticiple.) It’s the ulitmate lack of agency, of (funnily enough) passivity — it says, “I am at the mercy of forces.” I reckon anytime we feel we’re “being made” to think or do something, we should challenge ourselves. Who is making us? Are we surrendering prematurely? Some women claim they’re “being made to feel inadequate” by sexual imagery, some men claim they’re “being made to feel” guilty about enjoying it. I don’t doubt the validity or veracity of either’s feelings, but one must remind oneself one is in charge. I could spend all day feeling guilty I don’t look like Kate Moss. Or I could decide that maybe it’s a little sad for Kate that she doesn’t look like me.

“... a lot of women who both resent this and desire it… [One] wrote ‘it feels strange not to be desired that way’.”
Of course! The relationship women have with desire is every bit as complex as men’s. Our feelings are not politically correct, women court desire and then reject it, they resent it when they’re young and then mourn it when they’re old. It is delightful, torturous interplay. Possibly the silliest thing I’ve heard on these boards is a bloke saying (to paraphrase), “I’d love to be a woman! You have the power. Men just desire you...etc.” Likewise, many women think, “I’d love to be bloke! You have the power. You get to choose...etc.” In reality, both views lack imagination. Whenever you think, “It’s easy for *them*” you are missing something.

cont...

cont...

For both men and women, feeling desire and feeling desired is fun and tragic and frustrating and confusing, generally all at once. We need to empathise, to inhabit the world of the opposite sex. And we should not blame them for being honest, even if we don’t like what we hear. It may sound ridiculous to some men that a woman could feel guilty for not looking like Kate Moss, but rather than blaming her for being shallow or vain, imagine her world, her landscape. Some women don’t want to hear how much men enjoy looking at naked women, but to accept that it is the first step to not allowing it to ruin one’s self-esteem.

The great thing about this article is forces women to consider how men really feel about sexual imagery, not indulge in the cliched female idea that, given their druthers, *all* men would look at *all* porn *all* day. Or submit to the furphy, “If really he loved me, he just wouldn’t *need* to look at anyone else. Yet the article doesn’t point fingers — it is thoughtful, reasonable, intelligent. We need to stop the gendered blame game about desire. Desire is difficult to manage for both sexes. It’s also the blood that pumps through the veins of society, the undercurrent in all art, the passion in marriage.

Re. The Tankard Reist. You’re right, Ginx, in saying that her politics shouldn’t prejudice how one thinks about her argument, and I would have disagreed with her even if she wasn’t a sleazy puritanical god-botherer. But I see her broader agenda as influencing her thinking on this issue. She is, in essence, a banner of things. She doesn’t want women to be free, she wants to them to be protected. And not just from real things, like violence, but also from pictures that she regards as distasteful. If she says she’s a feminist, then she is — and certainly not all feminists need be lefties. But she’s not my type of feminist.