The important thing is the relationship, which is marriage, not the State contract. If one does not have children or cannot have children [as one daughter] their love and commitment to each other is the marriage and does not need a State contract. They have a private legal contact and still hold their own names.

A State contract only need apply if children are involved; both to register the children as citizens and accept responsibility for their upbringing. I know of single mums with five children of different fathers and weekend access is hell for the children. I've heard boys say they want to murder their father for the way he has treated their mother. They have grown up with uncontrolled anger that is released in all their relationships. The media has a lot to answer for in promoting dysfunctional relationships and murder which children accept as normal behaviour.

Josephus, I have heard of similar problems amongst children of married couples too, so what is your point?
My parents were married in the Catholic Church and appeared happy for 20 years before dear old dad ran off with another divorced woman and her kids, greatly adversely affecting myself and my 3 young teenaged siblings.

So don't go on about marriage being the be all and end all for kids, because it often is not...

Suseonline,
Exactly my point. Marriage is the relationship not the State certificate.

Foxy

'Could you contribute something on the subject?'

Marriage to me is a covenant in contrast to a contract. Personally I have been extremely blessed to have a wife that has accepted me with warts and all. A covenant is entered more in what you can give rather that what you can get. Biblically speaking marriage reflects Christ who is the Bridegroom and His church (people in relationship with Christ). Unfortunately in our selfish generation good marriages are becoming rarer and rarer. People are carrying so much baggage into marriages that many fail.

As for changing the definition I think my views are well known. God is a covenant God (hence the hatred for Israel throughout history). God witness's a covenant in marriage hence whether u r shacked up, living in sin, or practicing homosexuality it will never be genuine marriage.

Thanks to everyone who's spoken about their
marriages and what it means to them.

To me - it is the relationship that matters.

It isn't always easy to keep the flame burning.
People grow comfortable with each other, or
they become creatures of habit and they aren't
always in tune with their partners. Sometimes
when you've been in a relationship for a while
you can get bogged down with a lot of negativity
and dullness and you can get tired of dealing
with all that stuff.

I think what is important is to take responsibility.
One person may do all they can to keep their
relationship as healthy as it can be, but it's not
enough. No matter how healthy you become, your
partner has to be working alongside you. Otherwise
it's not going to work.

Luckily, my partner does work alongside me.
We are a team. That's why it has and is working.
And hopefully, will continue to do so.

I've written in the past on this forum
what I think is relevant today about
marriage:

Each society views its own patterns of marriage,
family, and kinship as self-evidently right
and proper, and usually God given as well.

If we assume that there is only one "right"
marriage and family form, then naturally any
change will be interpreted as heralding the
doom of the whole institution.

It is important to recognise,
therefore, that there is an immense range in
marriage, family, and kinship patterns. The
marriage and family patterns of other cultures
challenge many of our assumptions about the
nature of marriage, family, and kinship.

Marriage like any other social institution, must
therefore inevitably change through time, not only
in our own society but in others as well.

Changes are already being attempted.
With Gay marriage being lobbied. But,
whether this succeeds or not in our society,
we have to wait and see. Thus far it still is illegal.