My separated wife and I still live in the same house (Different rooms) so we both can look after our children. We both love them and want to be full time parents.

My Question Is: - Do others live in the same situation and have you ever had other relationships

You think big are the salt of the earth to you and your ex great regards.
However it is not an option for most, I often think we should be educated far past school days in just living skills.
My job gets me close to this problem, so very many times I feel some understanding of it.
And frankly as one of a very big family I see it up close in my siblings.
The fact is we need another way, courts are useless and so full of PC rubbish that justice is the most unlikely outcome from them.
Yet our children suffer the most?
And very often the parent who both destroyed the marriage and harms the children most gets the kids?
We must come to an understanding children are not property and we only have them for a while.
No way I intend to be sexist but while I have an understanding both parents are likely to be the problem.
I fear men are expected to have far better manners than some women in these matters.
And I find courts are in no way related to justice in such matters.

Thank you Belly, as you could imagine it is a hard decision to make. We both want to do the best we can for children. That includes being truthful about the marriage not working. Dose anyone else have any experience like this.

BTW not sure current legals re this.

Previously such arrangements eventually accepted by court after a long time.

Problems may be time awaiting conclusion whilst property settlement, Centrelink, Child Support Agency, and everything else gets resolved, along with need convince court each is acting seperately throughout.

How resolve problems, such as if one party wishes bring a friend the other does not like home.

One creative solution was a couple who purchased opposite each other units. Accepted was an outer security door providing secure entry to both units, whilst able not requiring each unit door be locked.

They satisfied all they lived seperately whilst close enough to still provide supporting and secure environment for their young children. Outer shared security door let children feel they were living in a big unit with seperate lockable rooms

I got out of my first marriage 29 years ago. There's no way we could have continued living in the same house, so your situation never became an issue with us. Our children understood how things were and accepted the break up.

For many years my life had revolved around work and I wanted a social life. I learned to dance when I was 16 and went back to dancing. I spent my weekends socialising at the beach. I joined a singles club which had house parties [not a meat market, I didn't want that]. I had an absolute ball and got my life back.

One thing I noticed, those people who couldn't let go of their former lives had [in general] the most difficulty in getting on with their present lives. I'd say that most of us wanted to meet a compatible person, have fun together, fall in love and "live happily ever after" as the saying is. This would be almost impossible for those who were still living in the same home as their former partner.

I had a friend who was trying to do something like you have in mind. They had a big house and he lived downstairs whilst she lived upstairs and had her own entrance. He accepted that she was free to entertain friends, but he found it somewhat disconcerting when what was going on upstairs was obvious. Eventually he moved out and got the freedom he needed and was able to move on. Perhaps that suited his ex-wife too, but I can't really speak on that, because I didn't know her.

I've not been in the situation you are in so I can't speak from experience on that.

The point made by others about moving on is an important one. Raising kids together, C$A etc make it hard enough to move on let alone new partners having to deal with the ex under the same roof as you.

If you and your ex respect each others boundaries and the legals don't get in the way then maybe. My impression is that the kind of issues which split couples apart are still likely to be a problem when you are living under the same roof. That's your business but keep it in mind.

Good luck as you seek to find a way to look after your kids through a difficult time. If you can make it work it should cut out a lot of the practical problems with parenting after seperation.

R0bert