I am all for men becoming more involved in the raising of their children. I do have one question though - does becoming a stay-at-home dad mean that the man is not only the primary caregiver but that he also undertakes the lion's share of the housework at the same time?

I can see one problem here and it is based on biology. That is the ability for women generally to be able to take on many tasks at a time and the ability of men to be able to think of only one thing at a time. I bring this up because of the ability of my husband to become totally absorbed in the cricket and nothing can break his concentration bar an earthquake. So what is the toddler doing in the kitchen while dad is absorbed in the cricket? Do men have trouble with this or is it a myth?

Also I am interested in the concept that men tend to gain self esteem from bringing home money so that the family can function. This role is entrenched in a lot of societies and how do men manage that shift from the primary wage earner to the primary caregiver, a job that is not as esteemed in our market society.

Yes, a SAHD does mean doing most of the housework. And some blokes are pretty good at it.

As to the cricket watching dad, is it more a case of selective deafness as there is someone else around who he knows will tend to the kids? I like my cricket, but I also know when my kids need/want something and having the washing on the go; doing the ironing while I watch, and after the dishwasher packed and running..

The self-esteem issue is an individual thing. I tend to think that a SAHD needs to very secure in their self esteem and masculinity more so than most

I neglected to mention that my son-in-law adores his children and does a great job as a stay at home dad. When things got a bit rocky in the marriage a while back as things do in marriages from time to time, my daughter asked my advice about splitting up and I said to her no man you could ever hook up with would love those kids more than David does. They have got passed it and are getting along quite well now. Happy ending.

Man at Home, I tend to agree with you. I think the cricket-watching blinkers are more likely to come on when there is another responsible adult in the house.

As for only women being able to do more than one thing at once, I really think this is a fallacy. Perhaps a self-fulfilling prophecy too. Women are expected to be able to do more than one thing at once, so generally they just learn to. Men I think are less likely to multi-task at home, as they learn that they dont have to (or are taught that, usually by inference). They certainly can at work, so its not like its something that the male brain cant handle!