Yuyutsu: << Best thing, just contribute your body to science (organ donation given first priority of course), then funeral expenses are absolute zero! >>

My father died a couple of years back. He thought he'd donated his body to science (i.e. the medical school attached to the teaching hospital where he died), signed the appropriate forms etc, and so had made no arrangements for his funeral.

After his death, the university decided they only wanted some bits and pieces of him, so we were left to arrange the disposal of what was left. As it happened, I was the only one who had any money, so I ended up shelling out a couple of thousand dollars for the cheapest cremation possible.

While "leaving your body to science" sounds like a great idea, I'd recommend a thorough investigation of what that entails, so that your family isn't left with a large and unexpected bill at a difficult time.

I agree with Belly - the cost of dying in this society seems exorbitant. When I die I have no interest in what happens to my dead body. Why can't it simply be incinerated or turned into fertiliser?

Now that's a good idea CJ, & bodies make good fertiliser.

There was a great story, years ago, about fertilisers at Kew Gardens, UK.

Evidently they had a grape vine producing over a ton of grapes every year. Apparently the only thing they did for this grape was to bury a dead horse beside it every year.

I wonder who would eat the grapes, if people knew some of us were buried under them?

Sometimes I can't understand people.

We all know we're going to die, sooner
or later. Just as we know that Christmas
is on the 25th December every year.
We prepare for the one, so why not the other?

A pre-paid funeral plan (depending on what you want)
is available with most funeral directors. We
spend money on lots of other things that we
possibly could do without. However, why not ease the
worry for your family, and plan for your funeral
ahead of time?

I guess many don't do that because they don't want to
be confronted with their own mortality. Death is not
a subject that people want to talk about. But looking
for others to solve the problem is hiding your head
in the sand and not very responsibile.

"I guess many don't do that because they don't want to be confronted with their own mortality"

What mortality? only the body dies, and as far as I am concerned, once it no longer serves its purpose, it may just as well be chucked in the nearest rubbish bin.

Why pay for a product you do not require?

The funeral director is a private entrepreneur who is there to make money out of supplying a service. Of course he will advise all sorts of things to commemorate the dear departed. It is because we are not firm in our wishes that vulnerable relatives are taken advantage of by funeral directors after our death.

I would very much prefer to be cremated ASAP, no frills and no service. Those who care will find comfort in one another, so my desire is that they have a celebration of my life through a family get-together then or later, immediate family only. I don't need my ashes to go anywhere but into the nearest flower bed.

How to ensure that happens is the problem, but other than telling near and dear and leaving $$, what else can be done? The wishes of the living must take precedence over those of the dead and many people find solace in visiting the graves of lost relatives and friends.

CJ Morgan
"...My father died a couple of years back. He thought he'd donated his body to science ... and so had made no arrangements for his funeral.

After his death, the university decided they only wanted some bits and pieces of him, so we were left to arrange the disposal of what was left. "

OMG, I had no idea that they would pick&choose the bits that they wanted! Thanks for this info because I too, told my family that I want my body donated to science/donate organs.

Foxy,
I totally agree with you. One puts aside money for everything else but many avoid funeral arrangements.
My mother is healthy and only in her early 70s, but she organised everything very well including her euthanasia application in case she will need it. She also visited some nursing homes and put her name on the list at her preferred one, just in case she will need to go there. And she has a funeral plan (wants to be cremated). It really is peace of mind to know that when the time comes, we don't need to make choices for her and doubt whether we're doing the right thing by her.

As for disposal of my body, personally I don't care what happens to it, and I don't expect my children to want to visit a plot or grave. But, I still think a plan of some kind would give my family the option to use it if they need it.
Perhaps they will need it for closure or help them with the grieving process or something. I'd like to know that the option is there for them.