Pelican

You are so right about the comb-over. I am a big fan of Bill Murray and one of the most hilarious send-ups of the comb-over was his performance in 'King-Pin' with his lacquered comb-over flapping in the breeze. However, that was comedy - what is Donald Trump's excuse?

Agree that bald can be beautiful.

It occurs to me that the whole topic is a symptom of making judgements about people based on stereotypes and knowing almost nothing of the rest of their lives. Some people do have jobs that don't enrich them but which meet a need and their passions lie elsewhere. A cheap suit on a middle aged man might not look good, it might tell you something about their taste in appearances but it tells you nothing about the other parts of their lives.

They could have a really rich life in other areas which many of the wearers of expensive suits might totally miss out on. I know that I can get great joy from things that others just don't get and others seem to prize things that I don't relate to at all.

The funny thing is that people if given the opportunity have a habit of being very surprising with what enriches their lives.

R0bert

R0bert

I agree completely. Cheap clothing in no way is the measure of a man. It is the character, decency and empathy of the person, him or herself, that matters. Which is why I mentioned Donald Trump - all the money in the world, trophy wives and no class whatsoever. The same applies to to the likes of Paris Hilton, all the advantages and contributes nothing.

Therefore, a cliche:

You can't judge a book by its cover.

Fractelle and R0bert

Your comments about not judging a book by its cover remind me about when I was working in a pub in London in the late 80s. There was this old-ish man who used to come into the pub night after night and just stand at the end of the bar with his one and only drink and never spoke to anyone. He wore a tattered old suit, but was reasonably groomed.

Just the sight of him used to make a lump come up in my throat. One night it became so unbearable that I just ran out the back of the pub and bawled my eyes out. My husband suggested that I try drawing him into conversation, so I did.

I’d like to be able to say that he turned out to be a fascinating old man who’d had a wonderful life … but he wasn’t. He was unbearably boring. However, by talking to him, I realised that he was neither unhappy nor lonely. He was just someone who kept to himself and didn’t give a damn about whether he was interesting or not.

I didn’t realise it at the time but he actually taught me a lot.

Dear Houellebecq,

This thread is quite a surprise from you.
Most men tend not to speak about their feelings.
I suppose because they fear they're going
to be humiliated or belittled.
They don't want to be fired, or left out or
have promotion bypass them. They have status problems
and worry about their position in society, in the
family, at work. That's why I'm quite moved that
you opened up in this way.

Now, I've got to confess that -
I actually love a man in a suit.
A suit usually adds style to any man - (even one
with a comb-over - although, bald is sexy -
remember Yul?).

A suit gives a man something he may not have had before -
a certain 'bearing.' The same can't be said for - say a
kilt.
I remember seeing one guy with a fat belly
wearing a distressing kilt that was very short,
like a mini-kilt.
It happened at work - we had a "National Costume," day.
I'm sure he thought he looked like a million bucks - but
he'd have been better off in a suit.

They say that, "Clothes don't make the man."
But that's true only up to a certain point.
We do judge people by appearances - whether we
care to admit it or not.

You see middle-aged men in suits as some kind
of failure.

I don't.

R0bert:” The funny thing is that people if given the opportunity have a habit of being very surprising with what enriches their lives.”

Tell us then. “Moments of joy are felt when […fill this space…]”.

I think there should maybe be a stipulation that you have to be wearing a cheap suit while experiencing it and all females are in jeans and sloppy joes.

And no, “shopping for new clothes” is not allowed.

Me first; those looks of wonder in the morning when the tooth fairy did come and all those moments of magic reflected in young children’s eyes.