Dear Ginx,

My comments weren't meant to be taken as -
any sort of "lesson."
And, I'm by no means suggesting
that we all have to agree or even be
"nice," to each other.

My comments were merely a plea -
for civility.

Is all.

And all I was doing Foxy, was talking about reality.

Ginx Foxy has asked for people to moderate their behaviour because the behaviour impacts on others. That's not an unreasonable request. She has not threatened anybody and seems to have tried to avoid singling individuals out.

Real debate does cause tension and sometimes inflamed passion but it appears that some of the abuse and nastyness which appears in on line discussions is individuals either enjoying the conflict or using abuse as a technique to cut out serious discussion.

For those wishing to expand their understanding of topics or even to persuade others regading a viewpoint a culture of personal attacks is harmfull. The site works due to a combination of relatively low editorial inteferance combined with flaming not being a dominant theme. If the balance shifts too far either way then it becomes something else.

I'm posting rarely these days in part because the use of personal battles seems to have become more widespread (a subjective view). I try to be fair in my dealings with others but quite frankly the effort involved in sorting through all the petty swipes is more than I can be bothered with.

Without the efforts of people like Foxy who try to clean up some of the rubbish others drop around this place it would lose a lot more contributers and readers. The reality is some will delight in making a mess here, others are so focussed on their own agenda's that they don't think about the harm they do and a precious few like will try and keep it better for most.

R0bert

Bronwyn and Pericles,

Thanks for the information on Belly and the link to the post where he outed himself, identity-wise.

Belly's last post on OLO was on Monday, 13 April 2009 at 6:34:46 AM, nearly a month ago now. See: http://forum.onlineopinion.com.au/thread.asp?discussion=2685#60155

With the information from Bronwyn's faultless memory as to Belly's full name, a google search set to 'pages from Australia' gave me a likely contact number for him. Two phone calls had me talking to a friend of his, and to that person's knowledge nothing catastrophically bad has befallen Belly. As it was put, "if anything had happened to him, we would have heard about it". In any event they will now specifically check up that all is well with him.

So, presumably, OLO will see Belly posting again before too long. I noticed in one of his last posts in the thread linked to, Belly claimed to be in the process of losing a bit of weight. Perhaps he has been 'away from it all' for a bit while continuing on this path.

Apologies to Fractelle for this little deviation from the topic. Now, back to the mayhem and free character analysis, not to mention some of the less conventional dinner party social graces. For myself, I must start doing a spot check of those 1,810,000 Google search results for (unquotated) 'sexy magazines for women', just to see how close to the money Fractelle's double quotation mark enclosed search term results of 149:4 really are.

PS I have just noticed R0bert's post as I went to post this. I take this opportunity for endorsing his general view, and particularly his observation that "... it appears that some of the abuse and nastyness which appears in on line discussions is individuals either enjoying the conflict or using abuse as a technique to cut out serious discussion.".

To all.

I have not received any email alerts for close to 24 hours now. Have notified the PTB at OLO, but wondered if others had ever experienced problems receiving their selected alerts.

I was, therefore, amazed that this thread was still running (out of control it seems).

I am not going to comment apart from thanking people for their contributions. I agree that we can have entertaining debate without resort to personal abuse.

I am not interested in statistics (thanks for your help Forrest) but I am interested in creating thoughtful response.

Humour is always appreciated, but not the schoolyard type where it is at the expense of others. And now I'm sounding like the 'Net Nanny' - which is not my intent.

I suspect that, like many bullies, people who do resort to flaming, apart from gaining attention, actually want to be liked. This may sound counterintuitive, but I think I may have a point.

I am going to end this post with a not quite on topic video from the wondrous Tim Minchin, there should, in this poem, be something that we can all identify with (unless you are exceedingly new-agey) and can laugh at.

I believe that our most valuable resource resides within in us - the ability to laugh - especially at ourselves. I went through my own new age stage some years ago, but fortunately avoided getting the butterfly tattoo.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UB_htqDCP-s

Ginx

I won't presume to speak for Foxy, but for me your banter is quite okay. You've gone to more trouble to engage with Houellebecq here than I'd be bothered with myself, but I see nothing offensive in what you say. Most of the time you're never far away from driving home a worthwhile point and adding to the debate in question and your quirky sense of humour provides great relief at times. :)

I differentiate strongly between your posting style and that of Houellebecq's. From the moment he started posting, he has carped constantly from the sidelines. Nobody would go to a new acquaintance's house for the first time and straightaway begin criticising them at every turn, and yet this is precisely what he's done on OLO. He harps on about elites and cliques and wonders why he still feels on the outer. Most newcomers ease in gradually and soon feel at home and well accepted by others on the site. The fact that Houellebecq has been unable to do this, or unwilling to, says much more about him, than it does us. It's a shame really because he does have a lot to contribute when he can put aside the personality attacks.

Houellebecq

You've overstepped the mark in this thread, a fact that should be obvious to you by now, even if it wasn't at the time. I find it curious that we've had no apology, and this from a person who has just recently started his own thread on personal responsibility. When are you going to stop blaming us and admit you've slipped up, and as such let us all move on? We're not vindictive. This episode won't be forgotten, but we are capable of moving on and participating in new discussions together.

I mightn't have worded this quite as graciously as Foxy and RObert have, but my intention is the same. Like all of us here I'm sure, I just want to see OLO remain a vibrant and interesting source of meaningful exchange and debate, without it degenerating to the level of hurtful personal attack.