This year it will be the 30 year anniversary of when I gave my baby girl up for adoption. I was only a teenager at the time and it was surely one of the most difficult things I have ever done in my life so far.

I came across this poem a number of years ago and it certainly brought me a great deal of comfort. So for any one who has been involved in the adoption triangle, I hope you enjoy this.

Legacy of an Adopted Child (Anonymous)

Once there were two women who never knew each other.
One you do not remember the other you call Mother.
Two different lives, shaped to make yours one.
One became your guiding star; the other became your sun.

One gave you a nationality; the other gave you a name.
One gave you the seed of talent; the other gave you an aim.
One gave you emotions; the other calmed your fears.
One saw your first sweet smile; the other dried your tears.

One gave you up, it was all that she could do.
The other prayed for a child and God led her straight to you.
And now you ask me through your tears.
The age-old questions through the years:
Heredity or environment, which are you a product of?
Neither my child, neither; just two different kinds of love.

Tammy-Jo

Brave lady. You are right, of course, that no-one can possibly know exactly how you felt, even if they have been in the same situation - simply because they are not you. But I feel for any girl or women who has been through such a life-changing experience.

I think that poem could do a lot of good: not only to the mothers who share your experiences, but, of course, to the children themselves. What a very sensitive point of view it expresses and what a healing balm it is capable of being.

Thank you for sharing.

Dear TammyJo,

Thank You for the beautiful poem, and for sharing with us something that must have been very difficult for you. My heart goes out to you because even thinking about it brings tears to my eyes.

As Romany said, you are a very brave lady - and I wish that I could give you a hug.

You be kind to yourself and take care.

Tammy Jo :)

That beautiful poem sums it up perfectly. I have not experienced what you have, but as a mother I thank you for reminding us that children are precious.

TammyJo, thank you for sharing and posting that beautiful poem.

Thank you everyone for your kind words.

I was later reunited with my daughter in 2000 when she was 22. I kept my name on the adoption registery in my country of birth and dearly hoped she would find me. We met face to face and it was a healing time for both of us. The last time I had seen her was when I said goodbye 1 week after her birth.

She was adopted into a wonderful family. If I was given the opportunity to hand pick a mother for her I could not have picked anyone better than the beautiful woman who did become her adoptive Mom- her real Mom.

Yes, that poem really does sum the situation up.